10 Characteristics Of Highly Toxic Parents

DISCLAIMER: This video is for educational purposes only. This video is not a substitute for professional diagnosis, advice, or guidance. This video is not made to attack anyone who may display these signs, but rather to understand them and bring more awareness to the topic!

Writer: Max Gustavo
Script Editor: Vanessa Tao
Script Manager: Kelly Soong
VO: Amanda Silvera
Animator: Chantal Van Rensburg
YouTube Manager: Cindy Cheong

0:00 Introduction
0:45 THEY ARE HYPERCRITICAL
1:22 THEY DON'T ALLOW YOU TO EXPRESS YOUR TRUE FEELINGS
3:01 THEY COMPETE
3:40 THEY DON'T SEE THEIR CHILDREN AS INDIVIDUALS
4:20 THEY CONTROL THEIR CHILDREN USING GUILT AND MONEY
5:02 THEY ALWAYS PUT THEIR FEELINGS FIRST
5:34 THEY DEMAND YOUR ATTENTION AND PRAISE
6:06 THEY WITHOLD LOVE AS A FORM OF PUNISHMENT
6:48 THEY GIVE NO APOLOGIES AND TAKE NO BLAME
7:32 THEY IGNORE HEALTHY BOUNDARIES

[thatguy-tdmj]

expressing why you are angry = disrespecting your parents

[chynabarbieeeeee]

It's funny how parents think we have depression because of technology when technology makes us feel better and in our own little world

[KnittingJoy]

10/10.
"Stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about." One of my mother's favourites.

[idkwhypickinganameishard]

I want to stop watching because I keep crying with these videos but I feel more understood here than by my own family

[datboi]

1. they are hypercritical 0:45
2. they don't allow you to express your true feelings 1:22
3. they compete with you 3:01
4. they don't see their children as individuals 3:40
5. they control their children using guilt and money 4:20
6. they always put their feelings first 5:01
7. they demand your attention and praise 5:34
8. they withold love as a form of punishment 6:06
9. they give no apologies and take no blame 6:48
10. they ignore healty boundaries 7:32
I hope I could help!

[Imuishere]

“Quit being overdramatic” “act your age and be mature” I was told this when I cried. And that 2nd one hit so hard it made me want to cry.

[MARIE.M.A]

i started crying when most of these things matched my parents. i haven’t cried in years

[alunalionheart]

After 27 years I finally understand that there is nothing inherently wrong with me. I’m still struggling to find love and respect for myself and my personal goals. I see the same thing happening to my little sister now, but i’ve been cut off from the family and have no clue how to help her.

[DonkThikkness]

The stigma of “parents did their best” has got to end and we start acknowledging abuse for what it is. Child abuse. People like this do not deserve children, nor do they provide any value to the greater good of the world. I understand that these people often had abusive childhoods, but excusing it to allow the cycle of abuse to continue (which so often happens) is beyond irrational.

[haydenmusicacademy]

My parents literally checked every single item in this list. It's amazing how much damage toxic parents can do to us. I'm over 40 years old, have had no contact with my parents for nearly 20 years and am STILL recovering from the PTSD caused by being raised by them. Thank goodness I was able to find a good therapist. I hope anyone who has gone through this can find healing through therapy as it's helped me more than I ever could have imagined.

[joefred]

I expected one or 2 of these things to apply to my parents, but all of them did, and very easily lol. Everyone in my family acted like I was crazy when I distanced myself from my parents and moved to another state in my early 20's, but looking back I really think I made the right choice.

[alessandrocremona]

My late mother was this, I’m now watching videos and researching and realising I wasn’t the problem, God bless you all going through this, we are strong together

[DeletedUser_]

I’m so sorry for all the kids/teens who are here because of their parents being toxic. As they say, “All children deserve a parent but not all parents deserve a child.” I relate to all these things unfortunately Things will get better. Stay safe everyone 💜

[livishere]

Watching to try and avoid passing on toxic traits intergenerationalally. The guilt of trying to make your own mental health better while trying to raise a balanced happy child is the heaviest feeling . To any other parents here trying to better themselves, im proud of you! You are a good parent !

[inpireme]

If you searched for these videos and you are experiencing abuse, I hope you escape from these people and be healed soon. You are not alone. It is really hard dealing with them especially when they are supposed to be the closest people to you.

[onlyyou]

I have 2 younger siblings and now when I look back at how I used to treat them, I feel so disgusted of myself. But my reaction to their actions back then was only a reflection of the reactions I got from my parents for similar situations.

Now that I have started living on my own, far away from my hometown, I realise I've been abused, neglected and manipulated while I grew up.

I could never forgive myself for treating my younger siblings the way I used to do. Maybe it's beyond repair. I think I too have a hand in breaking them from inside. I'm so sorry for my actions but they don't necessarily need to forgive me.

[Danadan_]

Watching these to learn what not to do with my kids. I grew up in a very toxic environment and I’m always on the lookout not to repeat what I went through, break the family cycle if you will.
I am always questioning and teaching myself how to be a healthy parent because my babies deserve the absolute best, there’s a lot of doubt on myself but I’m trying really hard to be better everyday.

[Strokearm]

1. Hypercritical
2. They don’t allow you to express your true feelings
3. They compete with you
4. They don’t see their children as individuals
5. They control their children using guilt and money
6. They always put their feelings first
7. They demand your attention and praise
8. They withhold love as a form of punishment
9. They give no apologies and take no blame
10. They ignore healthy boundaries

[shroomiegunleader]

My dad was incredibly toxic. He fits into a lot of the categories on this list, especially #5. Anytime I would try and tell him the things he did wrong, his go-to excuse was, "Well, I could've treated you so much worse. I'm not as bad as other parents out there." I've been no contact with him for about 7-8 months now.

[TheCardiganUnderSomeonesBed]

I remember my mum telling me constantly how she didn’t understand how I was a bad and selfish person when she was such a great and kind person. Eventually I started to believe it. Once I asked to go to a movie with my friends and she said that I only cared abt my friends and no one else at all. I realise now that she was extremely toxic and I am beginning to distance myself now❤️