Why Relationships Require Self-Love

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No animal, perhaps, can hate itself except - of course - a human being: it’s one of the strangest, and most regrettable, flaws in our condition. This tendency to self-hatred is not only destructive of our spirit, it constantly undermines our efforts to establish workable relationships.

FURTHER READING

“No animal, perhaps, can hate itself except - of course - a human being: it’s one of the strangest, and most regrettable, flaws in our condition. This tendency to self-hatred is not only destructive of our spirit, it constantly undermines our efforts to establish workable relationships, for it is logically impossible to allow anyone else to love us insofar as we remain obsessed by the thought of our own loathsome natures. Why let another think better of us than we think of ourselves? If anyone did step forward and tried to be kind to us, we would have to despise them with the intensity owed to all false flatterers…”

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CREDITS

Produced in collaboration with:

Aaron Sampson

Title animation produced in collaboration with

Vale Productions
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"true love is the search by one radically imperfect being to express their tenderness at the sight of the struggles and pains of another."

anupma_sama
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If we don't love ourselves, we risk attachment--which is not love. We risk becoming attached to someone who could give us the love we want, even if it is only given to us in pieces. With this, we may become dependent on this person to give the love that we long for internally.

This purely external source of love causes suffering when gone, but having an internal source keeps us afloat.

MeganS
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"True love is only ever the compassion of the fallen for the fallen" is poetry!! who wrote this?!? I'm a songwriter and i gotta say I wanna steal this so bad. bravo y'all

VictorKholod
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This video stirred up a lot of emotions since I know all too well the feeling of self-hatred and how it can destroy relationships. Growing up, I wasn't taught to love myself and it's been a long, demanding path to progress to my current stage. Nevertheless, I'm not exactly there yet, but I'm pushing myself to get there. Love yourself, you deserve it! ♥

SearchOfSelf
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I was honestly surprised that the first moment I could express love to myself was the day I realized nobody else was ever going to do it. The callousness and pure evil of other human beings means I am all I have or will ever have.

Akumeitakai
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This is so true. This happened in both of my last relationships. First, I made them love me and I eventually made them hate me because of my self-loathing.

RahulSingh-ktgl
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Like mama Ru says: If you can’t love yourself, how the hell you gonna love somebody else?

luizamatias
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1 year of IFS therapy helped me to finally learn to love myself ♥️

I became a primary caretaker for my Inner Child so I won't burden my partner with that role.

My favourite book: You're the One You've Been Waiting For

kierlak
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"To fall in love with yourself is the first secret to happiness." Robert Morely

trinaq
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I have been through self hate 😢 I understand and 100% agree with this topic. Thnx for this lesson

shulawamushe
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The timing of this is video is ridiculous. It aligns with my present relationship with someone who displays the worst of narcissistic traits. Though I've been used & abused by this person, I still feel deep sorrow for whatever their past has done to create such a severely scarred individual. It's a sad situation all around.
❤️⚖️🧠

earnyourimmortality
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I have been heavy into self hatred
I have been curing it for the last 2 years and i can comfortably say I have beaten it with a lot of struggle

indissolubilisociavit
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Subconscious priming! If we are loving to ourself we are creating a subsconscious comfort zone of being loved. So when it comes around we accept it fully and it feels right.

ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool
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Your one of the best channels out there. Each video, each post has some incredible things about life, humans, love, relationships everything. Thanks alottt for being here and making this valuable content about life, emotions and mental health in this age where only few people know about the importance of these for an individual. I'm glad i found your Channel.❤

Farmingforskills
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Came here to make just to comment that I'm SO glad I'm now deeper in the path to true inner peace and that I'll (probably) never need to come back to school of life videos again. I wish to thank this channel that brings a lot of light in a sea of confusion in the self-help midia, you helped me a bunch! And for those in strugle, have hope, it IS possible to find peace, organize your thoughts and be present. Good luck!❤

wit
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I think, even if it has been mentioned before, that there is something to be said for self-love versus how a lot of us grew up in the older generation of people, pleasing and children being seen and not heard, and told to never talk back or be selfish and only think about themselves all of the time. So we did the opposite. I know what I am struggling and wrestling with as an adult is how to be empathetic and get out of my own head and listen to others, while also knowing when to pull back and tune out from their negative energy, and know that I can’t always help them or be responsible for their lives, even if they can’t see that or don’t want to help themselves. I love the music in these videos by the way.

goingup
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What kind statement about yourself would you wish to remember in self-hating moments? Let us know in the comments below.

theschooloflifetv
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ive been my own worst enemy for the last 5 years of my life. After years of trying different things to appreciate the life I was given it took a 4 min and 15 sec video for me to do some proper and deep self reflection. Thank you, I think this is the start of a better lief

icansavehiphop
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Sometimes these videos pop up in my feed in the exact moment I need them ❤

shenanikenz
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The fact that the value in this video is free 💯

cyyylas
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