10 Things Narcissists Say (And What They REALLY Mean)

Decode the hidden meanings behind the words of narcissists with our revealing video, '10 Things Narcissists Say (And What They REALLY Mean).' We'll unravel the phrases that narcissists commonly use in relationships and during gaslighting. Dive into the complexities of narcissistic personality disorder and covert narcissism, gaining insights into the toxic dynamics of narcissistic abuse. Whether you're trying to understand the phrases narcissists say to you or seeking to decipher their favorite catchphrases, this video provides essential knowledge to help you navigate the challenges of toxic relationships.

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*In this video, I share the tips, techniques and insights that have worked for me in my own journey of healing after narcissistic abuse along with expert tips and tools I've learned through years of coaching narcissistic abuse survivors. I am not a therapist and this video is not meant to provide therapy of any form. #narcissist #covertnarcissist

[Dr.Options]

"I'm sorry you feel that way." The classic disingenuous non-apology.

[NKRAIEM]

I heard the " you're too sensitive" and felt the need to defend myself... Now I get it- not for me and not someone who I could be in a healthy relationship with.

[tootD]

The trick is to look at a pattern of behaviour rather than just one or two

1. “You’re too sensitive”, “you’re making a mountain out of a molehill”
Narcissists do not have the capacity to deal with or care about your emotions.

2. “That’s interesting, but you know what I find even more interesting is…”
They do so to take over the conversation and redirect it to something that serves their interests. You could try to take back control of the conversation, but consider if it’s worth it to attempt.

3. “I’m sorry you feel that way”
Sorry can mean different things. They may say it sincerely, or to manipulate. “Sorry” may mean either sincerity or accountability, if you’re seeing a pattern of failing to take accountability despite repeated apologies, it may be a red flag. If they don’t make it clear that they are not taking accountability, they may be meaning it in a manipulative way, and trying to pass it off as accountability.

4. “You are ruining my life”
Unfortunately, when a narcissist is unhappy, it cannot be their fault, so they point fingers at the closest person to them. But take a look at their life before you - were they ever happy before you?

5. “I don’t have time for this”
This usually happens after they drop a big drama bomb, they then point it at you, saying that your reaction is unimportant.

6. “You don’t want me as an enemy”
This is a threat that occurs when things start getting ugly.

7. “You’re lucky I put up with you”, “you’ll never find someone like me”
This is an attack on your character and self-worth. They’re saying that you are worthless, and no one else would tolerate you.

8. “You’re overthinking things”
They want you to stop thinking about their lies of omission. These relationships train us into patterns of overthinking, and the longer we stay in these relationships, the worse our ruminations get.

9. “I never said that”
It’s not just them saying this one time. It begins to feel like selective amnesia, where they forget the things that are not convenient to remember. They then start to gaslight you, making you think that it’s you who has the memory problem. Keep records so that you don’t start believing the gaslighting.

10. “You’re just jealous”
This is used as a way to shame someone for a response that they have. You may end up trying to convince yourself that you “shouldn’t be” jealous. Also, oftentimes, this is actually projection. Instead of accepting the blanket of shame, try to think about why you feel jealous.

[vampireslayer]

My "awakening" began with the realization that all Cluster Bs fit a behavioral template.
Yes, everything is transactional and manipulative.

[will_Iam]

The vulnerable narcissist is never so overt in saying things like this, it's more like insinuations and carefully crafted devaluations. Although, I have heard the "I never said that" on more than one occasion. And, the most telling thing was when she said, "you're so clueless I could be cheating on you and you'd never know." This left me speechless because there was no real context for this statement except me asking about how her physical therapy went a few weeks earlier. I stopped trusting her that night, almost 2 years ago, and I finally have things in order for me to leave and there is very little she will be able to do about it.

[timc]

Unbelievable how they deflect everything. Mentioned lack of accountability to her today. Rather than acknowledging it and willing to own it. It got turned on me and she played the victim again.
All she had to say is sorry and I will work on it. It is something I need to improve on. I have No problem accepting my issues and try to be better everyday

[NKRAIEM]

" I never said that " OMG. Heard this way too many times... tons of gaslighting and didn't know how to handle...And yes, I knew to keep detailed notes of conversations to help me reality check ... Who would want a relationship like that, yet I was so drawn in bc of the dysfunction and emotional games😢. Only now that it's over and behind me am I able to get clarity on what I was in ...

[donmulder]

With me they often say things that seem to fit into the conversation at the moment as not particularly concerning, but after I walk away, it seems like it might have meant something altogether different, not so nice or maybe even a bit threatening or intimidating.

[judyyates]

Oh thank God you won't find anyone like them! Let's hope❤

[jeradblazek]

I can deal enough with someone else's feelings. What I can't sit in and deal with is when the person decides to project onto me as the cause of those feelings when I simply ask what's going on, but it was deemed or perceived as a judgement, criticism or "not coming at me right".
Then, instead of us talking about why they were feeling a certain way before I asked, it becomes how I don't handle the situation, conversation, argument the way they need.

[joshuaw]

She was a sensitive covert narcissist who couldn't control her emotions while I was trying to solve problems factually and she never communicated any issues with my behavior, except don't raise my voice, so I didn't. I never thought she was a burden, but since I was taking care of her she felt like one. I communicated everything and she withheld so much and dumped it on me after she discarded me, after claiming that was her worst fear.

[chibaby]

He always told me “you’re lucky I like you a lot”

[ligyasouza]

Some years ago i was talking online with a person that turned out to.be a narcisist. We talked all day long and he seemed to.be a good person and really.appreciated me.😮however i started seeinh very stange things.He would flare up for no reason and i started walking on eggs.Once after a very nice convrrsation he disappeared for days without a single word .When i asked why he said he bever did it it wss me who did it.However my text was the last one and he wanted to.gaslight me

[beetleything]

Heard all of those things - sometimes 5-6 of them from the same person.

[Bob-zhdw]

They also say, "If you really believe that and it makes you feel better "...

[alicec.]

If this was a bingo my ex would have won 😂

[BigPete]

Hey Christina! I hope all is well down there! If I hit the Mega BILLIONS tomorrow night I’m taking a nice trip down! 😂😎🙏😍♥️

[Sarah-yjlf]

My supervisor does the first one EVERY time I call them out for anything.

[thebowtie______]

I had to call the police the other night on my roommate... again. anyways when the officer was here, i could see them comfabulate and fabricate in real time. I have become their worst nightmare and educated super empath with nothing better to do. I came in wounded from a previous run-in with a narcissist (though at the time, i didn't know).thinking, I'd found a best friend, but they went on to destroy an art piece(a maniquin I've been giving a face). I spent 40 hours + on. They tried blaming my cat, but she simply couldnt of thrown him over 3 feet from where he was. I began catching on. Over the next few months i got myself educated. Now, my self-worth is solid. My wounding is healed. Additionally, i simply refuse to be taken out or stay silent about the abuse. They really made a mistake by picking me. I stood up to my narcissistic step mom. So a 20 year old (im 27) was never going to get one over on me.
I have to be accountable in that ive not been a perfect roommate either. I can be scattered, messy, and loud. Howerver i came in with the best intentions

[Itsmeandthatsok]

My husband always said You just misunderstood me!!