Husband Wants To Keep His Money Separate

Rachel's husband is having a hard time combining his finances. Watch as Dave explains the importance of having all the money in one account and the benefits that provides to a relationship.

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[MrJdouble]

People who bring less to the table always yack the loudest about openness and sharing.

[dustin]

My wife and I have separate accounts and you know what, we have never had a fight about money!

[milly]

My mum & dad never had joint accounts and they’ve been married for what feels like 100 years.

[jat]

I bet there are some things she isnt telling you.

[hirambright]

I think they should have three accounts, his, hers and theirs. That way there will be fewer fights about money. If he wants to buy a $1, 500 golf set and she wants to buy a $1, 500 purse there will not be an issue.

Individualism is quite healthy even for married couples.

[nvmcrider]

I'm guessing that she earns less money and has more debt than him.

[troym]

Husband is a smart man! Split the bills but keep it separate! My ex-wife was screwing me over. She would have all of his stuff at the end of the month while I was trying to save. I would have nothing at the end of the month because she “had a more expensive lifestyle!” I agree with DR on most issues and I know some couples can make it work but my wife was out of hand and so now I’m on my own and I have more money in my pocket and more freedom.

[lytonya]

I don’t know about this one. It’s easy to combine finances when you are both great with money. That’s not the case at times. Do what works for your household!

[melissaandreag]

We got married a year ago and still have our separate accounts. What we want to do is keep those separate accounts, but create one joint account for gas, groceries, etc. and a shared savings account :) I don't feel the need for us to both have just one joint account where all of our money goes

[hotandsoursoup]

If most marriages end in divorce over money issues it would not be wise to put your accounts together

[anubisgod]

I think keeping accounts separate can work. Its all about communication and honesty. They both have pros and cons and so the best option is dependent on who you are as people and as a couple

[aeromedical]

If women would get off this kick of wanting to be in control of EVERYTHING, you wouldn’t have this kind of problem. Women want control of the finances from the second the ink dries on the marriage certificate. They start to treat their husbands like they are financial morons and need to be treated like out of control children. The guy no longer “deserves” anything other than what she feels he’s entitled to. Meanwhile they spoil themselves while emasculating their partners.

[DK-]

Get a separate joint account that direct deposits for monthly expenses. Her "transparency" is nothing more than saying that she doesn't trust him to responsibly spend money. People who are used to being independent don't like being treated like a child with their money. Good luck to the husband.

[dolobrolic]

The problem with “joint account” is wife thinks her money is hers ....and your money is

[thomasaitken]

In an age where half of all marriages end in divorce, 70% of which are initiated by women, with "dissatisfaction" listed as the most common reason, it's hard to fault a man for not wanting to have a joint account. In a joint account any authorized user may legally clean out the account and all other authorized user have no legal recourse if this occurs.

[CarolBennettGA]

To each their own. Some want it separate. Some want it joint.

For us, in our marriage of 16 years (together for 20), ours are all joint.
Have we had financial struggles early on? Absolutely.
Did we argue in the beginning about what to do with which funds? Absolutely.
Have we had it where he was working and I out of work or via versa? Absolutely.

That said, those disagreements we had forced us to communicate. To have the hard conversations and to make sure we had the same goals.
Him and I are literally on the same page. We haven't had any arguments about money in years. We talk daily about our budget etc. We both have a voice and say in whay we do with our money. If one of us feels strongly against something, we wait and talk about it further.
We are in our 30 s, on baby step six, and pay cash for everything. We save for what we want. I cannot tell you just how much peace comes along with this. Its truly a blessing for us.

[johnmosbrook]

This woman only wants a 'combined' account (not joint account) just to have 'transparency' (making sure husband is not spending money on other women), although she contributes nothing to the account. Nothing but mutual trust here, right?

[corn_pop]

Dave must've been tired when he took this call. He didn't ask if either had children from first marriage and how old they were. Secondly, he didn't ask how old each of them were. He also didn't ask what the complete financial picture of each of them was coming into the marriage. If he makes big bucks and has a lot of investments, he may wan to keep finances separate so he can leave money for his kids. Alternatively, his first wife may have burned him financially.
How can Dave make his pronouncement that they must combine finances knowing absolutely nothing about them? Again, must've been a long day/

[DisabilityExams]

You divorced your first husband - maybe that's why your second is nervous.

[ElliotScottDating]

I wouldn't want my wife seeing me buy hotels and hookers either. Even then, I am keeping my money separate!