How to stop thinking about what I did in the past (real event OCD)

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In this video, we're going to talk about why rumination fuels anxiety and OCD and how to stop the cycle.

Thinking about our past is normal. What is not normal is feeling guilt, shame, and anxiety. Let me show you how to move forward.

– – – Disclaimer – – –
For information purposes only. Does not constitute clinical advice. Consult your local medical authority for advice.

[ocdandanxiety]

Do you think about your past too much?

[ryancurtis]

I'm gonna say it right now: Real-Event OCD is a B----! There's stuff I've done in the past I am not proud of. And even though it was a few years ago, OCD still likes to dangle in my face to this day.

[Hythenos]

Self compassion feels hopeless at first but it’s just a muscle you have to train. You just have to start with the fake it to make it method, and keep trying to be kind to yourself. Focus on who you are today. Focus on how you feeling guilt or shame probably means that you’ve learned and won’t be making the same mistake again. Also talk about the event with someone you trust like your therapist. Mine helped me see the event from perspectives I never considered. I dealt with it for 5 years and I finally beat it. I think you can too no matter how terrible or illegal it was. You are a person and we all make both good and bad decisions. Trust in yourself to know the path forward and stop avoiding what makes you happy because you believe you deserve some sort of punishment. Just go out and do it! I believe in you!

[The_Roach_Hiding_In_Your_Room]

I did a lot of bad things when I was younger. I wouldn't even call them mistakes because that downplays it too much. I'm trying so hard to be a better person but I keep getting fixated on the thought of one specific thing coming back to haunt me, like what if the people I love now found out about it and hated me, or what if I got in trouble for it. Sometimes I think of that and I can't stop and I just think of it over and over. There was one really bad week I had where I almost threw up because I was so anxious about that.

[Vynessah]

It's so hard when other people remind you constantly of your bad decisions. Specifically, with cancel culture. I feel like with my gen z generation, they don't allow any mis-steps whatsoever...even if it happens over ten years ago. They claim people "never change." :\

[alexandrac]

This one is the worst. It feels like I’m supposed to be feeling guilty because the things I did were wrong. And if I “let them go” then I’m letting myself off the hook when really I should be suffering. I wish I was a kid again when I had nothing to feel guilty about lol😂

[MrCaprisun]

Yup, I was young dumb and lost, but still, what I did was horrible. And ocd tells me "what If you want to do it again?" When I know i won't or "Was it really bad?" (yes, yes, it was) I'm not my past, and i know that, and it plays images over and over, but in the end It's all OCD

[mallowjim]

I wrote down all the events my real event ocd screws me about and ngl reading them again and again and aswering "I dont care" helps

[lambs]

Amazing how treating OCD involves confronting those fears head on. That takes a lot of bravery and strength.

[reichan]

Thank you so much for this video. I made a horrible mistake when I was about 12 or 13 yrs old that I deeply regret. I completely forgot about it until it hit me randomly when I was 17. It was like my brain zapped my memory of what happened. I beat myself up so bad and it triggered my anxiety horribly. I even thought it was a horrible dream or something like that. I would try to problem solve and played different scenarios in my head over and over and over again to the point I became mentally exhausted. Throughout the years it would come and go, but I always felt like I deserved to suffer.
It’s the worse thing ever and I’m teaching myself self compassion and how to forgive myself. I feel like my brain has been in overload with everything I’ve bottled up for decades. I suffer from various OCD’s, anxiety, existential crisis and DPDR. This has been such a rollercoaster ride of mental illness 🥲🫨😵‍💫

[NeonBeeCat]

i did so many awful, nasty, and horrible things when i was a teenager that i can hardly live with myself cause of it, it makes me wonder what if all the time.

[madhu]

I don’t think words can express how grateful I am to you💗

[PaulaSmith-mibz]

Does anyone else look at random people and wonder ”what would they think of me if they knew all my mistakes"

[rodneytrotter]

Brilliant video, i have been struggling the past few years with real event OCD in conjunction with false memory OCD, which is pretty scary as it makes you question how things happened and can make you believe in things that didnt happen. Keep doing your thing nate ❤️😎 love from UK

[MsAshleyW]

I have real event OCD and it is unlike anything I have ever felt before! I do have other themes but this is by far the hardest. I am hoping that I can recover and take something positive from it in the end.

[icantthinkofaname]

Thank you so much for these videos. There are times where I can feel myself regressing in my healing journey, but you and other ocd resources really do help me better understand my mental health. I swear you guys have saved my life and I’m sure countless others.

[AstroBethTeal]

Hi Nate, I am not sure what else I can say other than thank you. I have no idea how you always manage to upload a video on the exact subtype of OCD that i may be going through. Each time without fail, you help me understand that the very thing that has been torturing me day and night for the past month or weeks is just OCD and nothing more. I'm not sure if you have wires connected to my brain that let you know whenever I'm going through something but I am so grateful to have found you and your channel. I thank you endlessly for the work you do.

[AlisonBryen]

This channel has helped me to accept that I have OCD. In the past, I could never believe it as Real Event OCD is rarely included in the self-help books, and I was bombarded by thoughts about things that had really happened in my life. So, even though my therapist assured me it was OCD/intrusive thoughts undepinned by shame and guilt, I couldn't accept it as the books didn't cover it. I just thought i was a monster and hated myself.

It is only recently after watching YouTube videos like yours about real event OCD that I have finally been able to accept that this is what I have, and I am able to more fully engage with the treatment, and it is beginning to work for me.

OCD thrives on doubt and uncertainty, and it can latch on to ANY subject/focus.
I just wish a lot of the self-help literature explained this better.

[trf]

Nate, I appreciate you and your content!
viewers, I know that whatever your going through seems OVERWHELMING and you may be thinking "I can't anymore with ....". You are strong. You can get through this. I have been dealing with intrusive thoughts for 15 years. I've had depression since I was a kid. ocd/anxiety for 20 years. the "first" 10 years of my intrusive thoughts were a nightmare! The last 5, its still hard to deal with but with cognitive behavior therapy and watching Nate's numerous videos on countless topics, I've been able to overcome so much (even those things I didn't know how to bring up in therapy or weren't an issue until the past couple years). I know the feelings of doubts, and even suicidal thought reasoning (if i do I'll end myself). You are NOT your thought(s). If you WERE your thought(s), it WOULDN'T bother you. that's why we seek help. because we don't know what to do and we're scared. The "what if I do this/that? what if I did do this/that??". I love you, keep fighting.

[christianrutegard]

Thank you, Nathan. You're one of the best ocd experts online.