5 Signs of A Dysfunctional Family Dynamic

Do you often wish you were a part of a different family?
Unfortunately, not all families are idyllic. Sometimes, a family home can be filled with tension and anger instead of warmth and love. If there’s a dysfunctional family dynamic, every new day brings a different set of challenges. Here are a few common signs of a dysfunctional family dynamic.

Writer: Stela Kosic
Script Editor: Caitlin McColl
Script Manager: Kelly Soong
VO: Amanda Silvera
Animator: Aury
YouTube Manager: Cindy Cheong

References:

[Nerunerunerium]

In my experience, opening up to each other (family) is like asking for insults or arguments :/

[khalilahd.]

It’s incredible how accurate these videos are. Your commitment to healing my inner child has encouraged me to prioritize my mental health and to work through these childhood traumas. I hope nothing but growth and continued healing for those still navigating these feelings 💚

[derekbacharach]

As a therapist, I have clients who have experienced at least one of these in their family upbringing. What's so hard is to realize you're in a dysfunctional family while you're in it because you have nothing to compare.
I hope there's another video that can answer the question my clients ask me and probably some viewers who come from dysfunctional families: why?
The short answer to this is it's Intergenerational transmission. It's not genetics; it's learned and passed on.
The good news is by watching this video, or if you already realize you come from (or still are in) a dysfunctional family, you flicked the switch in your mind from auto-pilot to manual, the first of many steps you can take to break the Intergenerational pattern and prevent the dysfunction from getting passed down.

[gamesboredom]

Fear, neglect, silence, and isolation...man, this video made me cry. I'm tired of this kind of life

[alexandriarogers]

As a new mom to a beautiful 6 month old baby girl, I greatly appreciate all the parenting psychology content you've all been putting together. It helps me know what signs to lookout for and how to be aware of how mine and my husbands parenting styles affect and will later affect my children as they grow. And as such I can try to be a better parent to them and give them the best life I can. Thank you for all the parenting psychology content 😊

[sundaymorning]

Here is a Summary
1. 0:21 - Fear
2. 1:06 - Codependency
3. 1:58 - Neglect
4. 2:30 - Silence
5. 3:09 - Isolation

[shantallj]

Growing up I identified with several of these dysfunctions. I am 50 years old and I am still affected by it. I vowed to change the narrative with my children so they would not identify with my past disfunctions 💔

[Larry_Alvarez]

Both of my parents use fear as advantage for me and my sibling for more than a decade and my father is the one who abuses it the most. I tend to find the cracks and fight back and encourage my sister later on. Both of us are no longer in fear of what we stand on, he's no longer a problem.

[Tarrzan]

Silence and isolation is a BIG one for me and my family. I have two parents and an older brother and little sister. We reside far away from our relatives, and when they do come visit us, my brother and sister isolate themselves in their room. In the household, we all pretty much do our own thing and barely speak to one another. I’m the outgoing one in the family that my parents relied on. But I don’t think they see that their parenting has made my brother and sister any better, nor are they capable of pulling themself together. A lot of confusion and miscommunication. It’s quite saddening and frustrating for me.

[btcxwxy]

Here you all go:

1) Fear (0:23)

2) Codependency (1:07)

3) Neglect (1:58)

4) Silence (2:31)

5) Isolation (3:10)

[eniss]

I’m literally crying right now because every single point mentioned is something both my sister and I faced growing up to a more extreme degree than I’m often capable of admitting even to just myself. Thank you for these cute little videos that cover such important ideas with such kind and calm language in addition to the cute style of animation.

[hiitsme]

My family shows all of these signs. Unless there's guests at home. It's like they're completely different people. It never fails to surprise me how great they are at acting, they could've been in cinemas lmao

[mael_neves]

Growing up with my parents I have learned that lying is the saver option

[randomlymadeanimations]

And some parents wonder why their kids don’t feel comfortable around them-

[EncerK]

Silence and isolation were/are my family dynamics. We all lived together as individuals. We didn't talk much because my dad wouldn't allow open conversation. We kept to ourselves as best as we could, just to try to keep the peace. And then we didn't have any social connections outside of the family, either. I struggled with poor social skills for a LONG time.

[DreamyWorld]

Friendly remind that NEGLECT CAN BE EMOTIONAL ALSO! Similar to the "Silence" point made in this video, a parent can be neglectful by not caring about their child. Not spending time with them, not talking to them or having interest in their lives. Not remembering facts about their kids, like their age and what grade they're in. It's still abuse, even if it's not as obvious.

[jacoebiegreenley]

As a girl growing up in a disfunctional family and living out of fear from my "father" is never easy and I'm scared to even do anything in case it annoys him or makes him shout over the small inconveniences, I don't wanna blame my mental health on him but he's definitely the catalyst on why I'm so introverted and i lash out when things get stressful, I don't see him as a father figure as he's given me no reason to see him as one, and once I've gotten older to where I realise what things are, this is not what a family should be like a house gripped with tension and fear because of him

[starcloister]

For me it was the fear. I would hide my interests from my family because if I was interested in something they didn't like or approve of, they would make fun of me or yell at me. Like if a show was deemed too silly or juvenile for their tastes, or if an interest was deemed not respectable (like when I told them I wanted to develop video games for a living). Sometimes I'd be watching my favorite shows in secret and my heart would be racing because I'd be so worried they'd come in my room and see what was on.

[TheLeah]

My mom was abusive to me and I feared her. I was afraid of making mistakes because she would scream at me, take away my things, and physically beat me. I’m in therapy now and as an adult our relationship is better now but I still fear making mistakes and I’m scared when people yell at me thinking they will harm me.

[dripz]

For me it's not my family dynamic, it's the father-son dynamic. He is never abusive or neglectful, but he applies to everything you said in the video (except neglect). My small problems don't really matter anyway because other people have faced real abuse and neglect (including my Dad).