What is Projection?

What is projection? We hear people accusing others repeatedly of projecting but what is it and how can be best deal with it?

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[derekburge]

Never argue with a blown fuse... Holy shit. That's amazing advice!

[svartvist]

Thanks Tom for this clarification. My last run in with my daughter is abundantly clear now.

[adamludwick]

Damn it. You just explained my teens and twenties.

[dirk]

Thanks as always, Tom! Really looking forward to part 2.

[WallyPyneoil]

Lot of stuff about projection in 'Families And How To Survive Them', published in England in the 1980s. I read this book in 1986. Watershed moment.

[johnnylaramie]

Wonderful video, Tom. I enjoyed your explanation and the minor road rage example reminded me of my own past projections. Thanks :)

[Dnizzle]

That is the behavior of someone who is narcissistic

[Kitsunetim]

I see the projections in drivers today honking their horns. It's insane.

[Agenda-ztdj]

IMO, Our culture keeps us so busy, that we don't have the time for solitude, self reflection, and deep thought! This keeps us from seeing any real issues we have, and seeing what are simply projections aimed at us from others! Peace & quiet are essential for good mental & emotional health. I think this is why women love, create, & foster so much drama in a relationship. This keeps a man in a state of confusion as the shit tests fly past, and we try to just get a handle on the situation. I found that a short drive to a place I like, the park, the beach, the mountains...helps to ground me back to reality & I can then come up with some solutions to the problem at hand. Just my 2 cents!

[Seeleau]

Men Are Good That is how feminists use the threat narrative, saying men hate them and are out to get them etc. But it suggests that they are the one wishing ill on men instead. That would be something impossible for men to resolve on their own, like how you resolved your anger towards that driver who raced past you.

[phantomofoaktown]

How can you tell the difference between projection and an observation?

[tflics]

Great video! Do you think a lot of internet arguments stem from projection?

[Bombem]

Two thoughts: First, when discussing on the Internet, your primary goal is not to convince the other side, it's to convince the audience. So having your opponent go *kaboom* can be an excellent tactic to show others that your position is the rational one. (Of course, the next question then is if your audience actually values reason over emotion...)

Second, is projection the same or different from people assuming that you must be thinking the same way that they are? I see this a lot in feminists who claim that "You MRAs believe that men are oppressed in this society" and seem completely unable to process it when I reply "No, I think that men and women face their own specific problems and men's are not recognized nearly enough, but _nobody_ is _oppressed_ in the West today if that word is to retain any significant meaning at all".

I refuse to believe that this thought is too balanced or nuanced for some human minds to process, so they must be assuming that my worldview is simply the mirror image of their own ideology. Which would be projection?

B20

[HenriFaust]

I disagree that you should never challenge someone who's projecting because they might explode. If you have an audience, you should do exactly that. Their unwarranted emotional explosion will win people in the audience to your side better than any rational argument could. People instinctually avoid crazy people, as loose cannons are dangerous.

[LukeDavisAuthor]

I assume projection of insecurities when someone uses a shame attack. If they believe something is an insult then it is something they have an insecurity about. :) I normally just pump more current through that fuse though. Its like lighting a firecracker in an explosives bunker.

Them : You're a compassionless prick
Me : Is virtue signalling not giving you the same fullfillment as actually making the world a better place?

Them : Did someone hurt you? (When they hear I'm MGTOW)
Me : Sorry love but you can't force me to find you attractive.

Them: You're pathetic ...
Me: Is it comforting not having your own thoughts, or have you just not thought about it?

Them : You're not a real man.
Me : I believe thats called being someone's bitch, and thank you for making it clear who the bitch in this equation is.