5 SIGNS you are NOT an EJ (ENFJ, ENTJ, ESTJ, ESFJ) | Fe and Te Extraverted Judging Hero Enneagram 1

Diane and I list 5 signs you are NOT the EJ personality type (ESTJ, ENTJ, ENFJ, ESFJ).

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Hi there! I'm Joyce, a certified MBTI® Master Practitioner, Enneagram Coach, Jungian Typology Expert, Master NLP Practitioner, and Gallup® CliftonStrengths Coach.

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0:00 Introduction
0:08 ENFJ ENTJ ESFJ ESTJ
0:15 Sign #1
1:18 Sign #2
2:37 Sign #3
3:20 Sign #4
4:24 Sign #5

[SandaMayca]

These quicker videos you've been posting are FANTASTIC. So illustrative and to the point. I can now say for sure I'm not an EJ, and that's so helpful 🖤

[dawnriddler]

1. Being highly attuned and never questioning your own beliefs, values and desires as an individual, separate from the group
2. You have a string need for self-expression and differentiation as an individual
3. Prefer spontaneity over plans in most situations, not just in times of rest and relaxation
4. Frequent hesitation with getting into action
5. Feeling energized across the board from having downtime

[benjaminfast]

I'm definitely NOT an EJ. Didn't relate to any of this, lol! In my downtime (which is OFTEN) I am usually watching TV, playing a video game, reading a book, researching random ideas for any of my interests (or just random stuff for creative writing). I am almost never thinking about other people while I'm alone and it makes me feel like I'm self-centred when I start to think about that concept. But I just get wrapped up in my own little worlds of interests and the rest of the world disappeared from my mind.

Once I'm physically around people I feel I'm very attuned to them and their needs and thoughts and opinions. But it comes with some level of anxiety because I feel like I'm not able to fully be myself around most people because I'm too concerned with them and how they feel about something. That's why I feel most relaxed when I'm alone and I don't need to consider anyone else, when I don't have external pressures.

Not sure if that's an IJ or IP thing, or even maybe an EP thing? Any insight would be welcomed!

[shaneaverystarr]

Wow, number one was very decisive; not an ExxJ. Thank you!

[sofia]

Great session! Please continue this series of “5 signs you’re not an X”. Good topic/approach.

[jaywalks]

I can see the points here. Age does change this somewhat though, as I appreciate that by not looking after myself, I am a burden on those that I care about. Thus forcing myself to introspect on what I need and how to make requests for those needs to be met.

[grazynawolska]

Yes but Ti/Fi are important too. It's not "selfish" to occasionally take care of yourself. EJs have to learn that.

[brexcubo]

Thank you. Very good video. As an entp with very developed fe i'm always wondering if i'm mystiped, and lately people had associated me with a lot of enfj characters in media, but i really am not, even if i kinda admire them

[RisingSun]

This was another fantastic video Joyce! Love your content
-Your Friendly Neighborhood ENFJ

[Illysi]

Point #2 made me laugh: as I walk my dog I usually watch youtube, but I always pause the video as I walk past other people out of embarrassment/not wanting to stand out.

Point #5 I also thought wasn’t me, but when they said you feel an obligation to the group as an EJ, I started to realize that even when I watch a video or play a game on my breaks at work, my main focus is thinking about how to be better during my next classes

[gin-ginevi]

I love these shorter vids! I love the longer vids too but it's harder to find time for them at times.

Haha, naps are too short for me! Just spent three days recharging by myself at home doing nothing after months and months of having to "extrovert". I actually thought it wasn't enough, lol. -INTJ

[TransparentLabyrinth]

So a distinction I thought I'd share here based on my observation: I know someone who I believe is an EJ (ENFJ) who also has strong people-pleasing issues due to trauma. I have strong people-pleasing issues, but I'm pretty sure my Ji function is closer (1st, 2nd, or 3rd). The difference, from what I've been able to glean, in how we go about people-pleasing is that this ENFJ will actually struggle to come up with something for what they want, even if trying to get it out of them. For me, I have a fairly clear idea of what I want, depending, but sometimes I don't want to voice it because of people-pleasing. If asked, I can probably come up with something, I'm just hesitant to share it. This would make sense in that for the EJ, people-pleasing compounds the already existing Ji issues, pushing identity even further out of sight as a priority. But for the stronger Ji type, in my experience, it's more of this push and pull; I want what I want (if it's a situation where I know) but I may not want to say it.

Oh and additional note, part of the reason I may not want to say it is because I'm used to dealing with Fe in dom or aux position in my life, along with people-pleasing, so if I just plainly state what I want and don't also check in with them, they may just go along with what I want... to I guess "meet the needs of the group" as you put it. So the only way for me to successfully try to people-please is to be careful in stating what I want, so it's not latched onto as a way for them to people-please. It's really something else watching two people-pleasers try to please the other lol. 0/10, do not recommend. A funny (but unintended) example of this is the CalebCity video about two NPCs doing a mission together. Not that people-pleasing makes you like an NPC, but the passing back preference-stating to the other person.

[dominicsey]

This was interesting, makes EJs very impactful and coordinated in an adaptive way

[MiguelAngel_]

I like this kind of short videos. They are really useful. Thanks. Can u answered me if the estp are impulsive. Thanks.

[moneymanagement]

Can you do one on the TJ - INTJ, ENTJ, ESTJ, ISTJ??? I have each one in my family

[allisonscanlan]

Very interesting! Is this guest an enneagram 1 lol 😅

[love-risa]

what about the fe-ne (te-ne) or fe-se (te-se) EXXJ for the spontaneous one?

[jasminerox]

I actually identified as ESTJ before this video but now im considering ISTJ🤔

[stormiewutzke]

I understand they aren't my favorite. Ip

[MsSturbuck]

Omg this type of video makes everything SO much easier to understand 🤍 Please make more of those about other types