3 Things To Expect When Dating A Widower!

Dating a widower can be a great thing! But also has it's challenges. In this video i give you the truth on what to expect when this happens. My dating advice comes from years of experience coaching widowed couples and understanding how the brain works when it comes to loss and infidelity. Widowers and dating a widow sometimes find it hard to move on at times. Even when they thought they've made their mind up sometimes emotions can arise to make them want to take some steps back in the relationship. So I talk to you about how to handle this even if your dating a widower over 60. These dating tips are still relevant to anyone no matter how old you are. So enjoy the video!

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Apollonia Ponti

Creative Commons — Attribution 3.0 Unported— CC BY 3.0

[scottalynch]

The ones we lose are not exes. They are our late spouses.

I am a widower who is now dating a widow. We both understand we will always love our late spouses. We have talked about our people at length. There are a lot of memories & history, especially when we were with someone over 24 years

[Pat]

I married a Widower. I know & accept that he will always love his late Wife. He is able to love me, as well. He deserved a chance to have love in his life again. I was divorced & wanted to remarry, also. We met on Valentine's Day & fell deeply in love. We have been married for 3 years now & remain very much in love & very happy to have found love again late in life! He is the best man I have ever met! He treats me well & makes no comparisons. If he never said he loves me again, I would know that he does because of his actions towards me. He is a very mature & wise man to be able to move on the way he has! I am grateful for it! But for him, I would have remained single for life. I couldn't find any other man who compares to him.

[carltarajkowski]

I lost my wife (soulmate, lover and best friend) to cancer in July 2019…..we were both in our 60s…..there was many times that I didn’t know if I could go on… my thought was to find another widow because she would have similar life experiences….I signed up on a dating site and after some time found a widow…..we have such similar histories it was almost eerie….. we’ve had our ups and downs but are going strong approaching two years…
Love can happen again!!

[JoelManers]

Lost my wife of 24 years 22 months ago. You need to realize that a widower will always grieve on some level at what they’ve lost. A widower can hold multiple feelings at the same time, love and loss, happiness and sadness. He will always love his late spouse but that does not mean that he cannot love you as well.

[Lilliemoore]

My greatest piece of advice if you are dating a widower is to allow them the freedom to openly talk about their late wife and share the relationship with you. It will help you understand their relationship type. It will also draw him to you if he feels like you are not trying to get rid of her. She will always be there. His affection for you is different. Make your own place in his heart. Don’t rush him to move too fast through the grieving process but walk through the process with him.

[JoseMartinez-mnhg]

Great video! Just lost my wife of 32 years about a month ago. We fought with an illness for a very long time. Still working through grieving issues and spiritual issues. There is a lot we are not aware of in this life that can play a part in the experience of loosing someone dear to our hearts. I'm finding myself having to face different feelings that I was thinking I was prepared for as I dealt with the illness. After my wife crossed over I learned the hard way one is never ready for the experience and there is a very strong connection (love) that transcends the absence of your loved one's physical body. I think we can all rebuild our lives after such a traumatic experience with time, faith and patience. Good relationships are never easy to find or replace, it just takes time. Whatever happens love is never forgotten or lost. My best to all of you who have lost a loved one and still trying to resolve the grieving issues.

[SolvePennyProblems]

I lost my wife on Jan 30, 2019 after birthing our son in December 2018. I honestly, do not see how I will ever be right. I told her I was going to work gave her a kiss because we were going on a lunch date in the city. I got a call 20 mins before I left work for our date. I rushed home and I knew and felt she was gone. I am a single dad with emotions going everywhere every day and actively look for help. I am declining, and our son is literally the only thing that is keeping me fighting. I'm not asking for help because she is gone and nobody can fix that. But, it's very difficult.

[roygross]

My wife of 38 years suffered horribly with cancer 2 years, and then finally succumb to it... the only woman I had ever known.
we had an exceptional, & passionate marriage. I don't have any tears remembering the good times, but it is hard to hear or see any video of her taken during the last two years. I will weep for an hour or two whenever I do.
I was totally devastated and could not fuction at all when she passed.
I could not drive I could not work I did not want to get out of bed I begin to eat even when I wasn't hungry and even full... I gained and hit 300 pounds. but when I fell in love again... I got my life back.
I had people tell me I should stay single till you quit grieving... well I think I would have eaten myself to death!
But of all the widowers I know who have remarried none of them have ever said, I wish I had grieved alone longer...
To love and to be loved it still the best thing in the world! I say If you find love again, don't wait any more.

[bertecrabtree]

Widowers can be emotionally unstable for quite a while afterwards. Taking it slow may help prevent a train wreck, but the woman will have to pull double duty on red flag identification for them BOTH because the widower may not see them due to their grief. The allure of dating and the emotions of it may be a stronger pull than the need to deal with the unpleasantness of loss. There's great motivation for putting off healing and jumping right into another relationship.

If you do catch a widower on the right side of the healing process, they are 100x better than dating a divorcee. Widowers generally value long term commitment, know how to keep a woman, don't believe the grass is greener on the other side, and will be more willing to grow old with you despite having differences where a divorcee has been trained to think they can just find someone else and will be more willing to quit than stick it out when things get hard. GL.

[paulclark]

Apollonia, you are spot on about how most widowers feel after losing their lifelong sweetheart, my wife passed away 5 months ago, but I had been her sole carer for 10 years, and my wife told me to find a new partner when she's gone.

[rickmahler]

I lost my wife to cancer this past September, it was a tough time watching her go through all she went through. It's taking some getting used to starting over and getting to know who I am without anyone in my life. All I can do is take life one sec, one minute or one day at a time.

[jackrembold]

Six weeks ago, my wife of 27 years died in my arms. On her deathbed she kept telling me that I would not make it alone and to please not live my life alone. She knew that she was dying and her last thoughts were to worry about me. That kind of love can't be replaced. I have a bit of an issue with the term "old wife" used in the video. Until or unless I re-marry, she's my wife and if I re-marry, she will not be my "old wife", she will be my first wife.

[kevinweber]

I am a widower. In my heart and soul I am still married to the the love of my life and soulmate. After 2 years, I am still feel the same. It is going to be a long lonely road back to her, but I hope to see her again. And yes, I hope we are still married. I made several little memorial videos and posted them on my channel. Erika is a beautiful soul. I hope everyone finds peace and happiness. God bless and take care.

[revelationguru]

As someone dating a widower, its not easy at all. And widowers should NEVER start dating until they are truly ready to date. They should not put others through unnecessary trauma. It's selfish.

[stinkybananaog]

You should really do a video on the effect kids have from the lost of a parent and the addition of having a widowed parent start dating.

[mairaraja]

I really needed to come across this video, thank you! As much as I love him and want him to of course always remember his late wife and speak to me about how he's feeling/memories, the deeper it's getting with us the harder I am finding it... now it relates with you saying trying to find someone just as great as sometimes I feel it's a comparison. Doubts are in my mind to not continue with how I am feeling lately going through all the emotions but I couldn't break him all over again...

[meiqichia]

I am dating a widower. Thanks for the advice. As I am single, as I never date a widower before.

[Myjoy]

Dated a widower who was 6 months out. He pursued me very heavily and showered me with flowers gifts romantic gesture. Fell madly deeply but his adult child was grieving and didn’t want dad to be with anyone else but mom. Her emotional well being is important. He stated he had a difficult and unhappy marriage but stuck it out especially since she got sick but had no good things to say about his ex. He has broken it off twice with me because of his child grief- which I want her to be ok. But it is difficult- because we really connect. I lost a child several years back so I understand grief. But it’s tough.

[edwinchira]

This video is amazing and accurately depicts what widowers do as a result of emotional turmoil. I lost my wife of 7 years 11 months ago to liver cancer. I have tears in my eyes pretty much every day. Our son is 6years old and he reminds me of her every single day. One significant challenge that I have always experienced is inability to avoid remembering the things she said or did, and I think that it may have turned off a potential love partner. I miss my late wife alot

[DLEVANS]

I just met a lady who lost her husband 2 years ago. We have been talking for 3 weeks now I’m taking it slow to get to know her and be very understanding.