Making Sense of Mindblindness and Alexithymia: Tips for NT spouses

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[rudyescobar]

I'm a magnet for out of the ordinary situations, so finding myself in a neuro diverse relationship doesn't surprise me 😂 In all seriousness, it's a challenging situation that requires extreme commitment to making things work.

[ViagensGringa]

This is the MOST helpful one so far. We agreed to get together after dance on weds, and he sat there hugging and chatting w another woman w his back to me for
20 mins while I waited on him like a damn puppydog ( he was my ride) and then was totally shocked that I was annoyed.

[lyanimoody]

Great explanation, now I'm starting to understand my husband who has ASD, THANK YOU FOR MAKING THIS CHANNEL 👍🏼

[chriss]

I can simplify this: Don't assume that someone will get the exact message you're trying to convey. This goes for NT folks and ND folks alike. Everyone is a unique person, with their own unique understanding, and communication is nothing but a group of imperfect symbols. Someone can get enough of your message to come to their own understanding, but unless you've found a way to directly implant a thought, no one but you will ever fully and completely grasp the exact idea that you're sending.

[jesuslovesjudy]

Yes he doesn't understand my feelings nor does he have any ability to ever identify what he feels. He's even said that he's never had a feeling in his entire life.

[lakibender]

Ok im starting to understand what I don't understand... LoL thanks a lot Mark

[mreese]

The neuro typical is just as mind blind in understanding the neuro diverse as the other way around.

[moonxxdark]

I have a question. Is mind-blindness not something a person can learn to cope with to some extent? It seems to me that where intuition fails, logic can take over to some extent, obviously never on the same level. But can a person with mind-blindness not memorize certain cues? Such as eye-rolling means someone is being sarcastic, crying means someone is sad, stomping around means someone is angry, etc. I have alexythymia and struggle to recognize my own emotions, but I have learned that certain bodily sensations mean I am feeling something, and then I can pause and try to puzzle out the meaning behind those sensations.

[zenarchived]

im just here to help my gf, she has problems expressing her emotions and im a child abuse victim which makes our situation worse so im trying really hard not to vent or rant

[amerlylau]

Oh my...yes, now i fully understand..also kind of hard to digest the fact 😂 this explained why he believes me when i sent him pic of my beautiful tattoo on my waist from back n tell him its my mum ..
n my sarcasm sometimes lead to his anger..😂
thank u for the explanation.

[gemmabanks]

My other half has alexithymia and Aphantasia. But no other neurological differences. So not ASD, or autism etc. I have an over active imagination and emotional instability disorder. So we are an odd pair. 🤣 but I thank you for this video, truly! Xxx

[markhutten]

ASD+NT Couples resources:

Parenting resources:

[markhutten]

If I have “mind-blindness, ” I am not going to know what you “might” be thinking - and even if you tell me what you are thinking, I’m not going to understand why you are thinking that way.

If I have “emotions-blindness, ” I’m not going to be sure what I am feeling - and I am going to be even more out of touch regarding what you might be feeling. Even if you tell me what you are feeling, I may not understand why you are feeling that way.

So, if you provide a lot of vague data in your “message delivery, ” I am not going to get your main point, because it’s buried somewhere underneath the confusion that I have downloaded - and the more confusion I have, the more anxiety I have.

The more anxiety I have, the greater the likelihood that I will continue to distort your good message - and if you get upset and angry with me for NOT “getting it, ” I will revert to some form of a shutdown or meltdown in order to reduce my anxiety.

[_Trakman]

isn't mind blindness a newbies name for Alexithymia

[zeneto]

Hi,
I must conclude that i am not in the spectrum.