The Cruelest Form of Gaslighting

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DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.

THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.

[youngblood]

Confront a narcissist about what they did wrong and watch them make it about you.

[tag_]

The cruelest form of gaslighting to me is being told "I love you" yet their actions NEVER match the words.

[dominiquegianni-embrey]

It’s taken me 14 years of separation to get out from under the grip of that type of toxic relationship. At 72 years old I’m feeling the freedom to be me. No matter what. I’m one of the fortunate ones. ❤

[natalieparker]

A narcissist is a predator. They always need a target - someone they can pick on and abuse. This education is gold, thank you, good Doctor.

[KiwiBee]

My husband narcissist of 34 years was the darling of everyone. He would often say no one would believe me and he was right - he had crafted and groomed his monkeys. They believed I was insane. He's passed on now and I'm free of his cruelty and the tribe of flying monkeys.

[holistichoneybee]

The worst is when you start to feel like you are the narcissist.

[PoodlesMcNoodles]

Yes! “No one will believe you” is totally reinforced by the “justice” system when you report your abuse and the judge finds the narcissist not guilty. Mind F for sure!

[hilpherHarris]

I knew as a child who my siblings were as they were cruel and unloving toward me. Fast forward to adulthood, and I had one person to believe me, my mother, but she passed away, and I was left with the smear campaigns and gaslighting by not 1 but 2 narc toxic siblings. They have lied, cheated, and stolen from my mother, and I am being portrayed as the villain who did these acts. For my safety and sanity, I just left my family, and I tell you that I now do not care who believes me. It took about 5 years to get here. I realized I am a better and more productive person with them or the family enablers out of my life, so if you make these choices for your life, it does get better.

[karenspafard]

I think the gaslighting phrase, "Nobody cares" is even more cruel.

[JennRazo]

The narcissist will spend time with family and friends character assassinating you, which is part of the reason why people actually often times don't believe you. This sums up my entire relationship with my mom.

[delicate.mascara]

"He/she has always been nice to me" is, in a nutshell, why so many abuse victims never come forward.

[CampaholicsTV]

I’ve heard “you’re the only one that feels this way” and “no one else has ever had a problem with me” and “you’re insane “ so much that I literally started to wonder and then believe that I was nuts and I had to be the problem. Thank God I found this channel and a few others and have begun to get educated on toxic relationships and narcissism. I’m 56 years old and two people in my entire life have called me narcissist, turns out that those two people for the narcissistic mold that I’ve been learning about. I was blind but I now I see so clearly

[jokendrick]

My late husband was a malignant narcissist. He told me many times that he as an attorney, knew of ways to kill someone and get away with it and he would have me committed for 72 hours as it was easy to do. Karma (cancer) took care of him. I spent as much time as possible on road trips to visit relatives. My dog was/is/always will be the best companion.

[MulattaMermaidvlogs]

Never being believed as a child until the narcissist did something to them created so many trust issues.

[tennysoneffie]

My entire life, ( for sixty odd years) my sister whispered nasty untrue things about me into my mother’s ear. She in turn told my other siblings. Then in 2018 I was diagnosed with breast cancer. This same narcissistic sister told my mother not to believe me as I was only looking for attention. My mother never phoned or supported me during this awful time, Mum died 3 years ago thinking I was a liar…..that I had shaved my head to go grey without having to endure the ugly regrowth..
It took cancer to make me realise how malicious and bad they all were. I have a mostly ‘No contact’ with them now.
I understand what it means and how soul destroying it is when the narcissist says, “No one will believe you”

[christychristina]

I simply keep a daily written record of the narcissistic behavior of my elderly mother. Very simple, no personal feelings or input on my part, just almost like a transcript of a tape recording of what she said or did and the situation surrounding it or that triggered her. Word for word what she said. It is the most helpful thing I could ever have done for myself. I'm not doing it to convince myself, validate myself, etc. I don't ruminate on it or spend my day thinking about it. It's a clinical document. It is amazing- with time and distance, the actions and words really do begin to become almost like a mathematical formula, predictable, and similar. It allows me to take myself out of any responsibilty for this monstrous behavior and put it in context. Very helpful to my well being. Liberating.

[SamsungGalaxy-dcmq]

Here's an unpopular fact. People who are extremely likeable, are usually ( not always) narcissists. The fact is that authentic people are not always likable or agreeable. The most likable people I have known turned out to be narcissists. They were involved in their church, their community etc. If you get to know them well enough and long enough, the true version of them appears. They always slip up eventually.

[MegaSnow]

I have a child who is a narcissist. I lived with that child to help take care of my grandchildren, and ended up leaving a few years later after emails from her to me was the proof I needed to get help from other family members. Many seniors are victims of abuse, and it was difficult to gasp that my own child psychologically abused me to such an extreme that I considered ending my life.

Narcissism is so easily hidden to outsiders because the narcissists put up a great front to the outside world. My abuser told me several times that other family members did not care about me. When I left without a word to anyone, I showed the emails to family members who did in fact care very much.

I am in a much better place and am concerned that this happens to more elderly that we realize. Thankfully, I am in good physical health, and with therapy my mind will heal from the abuse I went through.

Thank you, Dr. Ramani, for this video. Gaslighting is so very damaging.

[Tarotlynx]

"No one is going to believe you over me." Mother was very good at that. I'm on the autism spectrum, and she was a professional nurse. So there was nothing I could do. She was in absolute control until I was about 40, in which, at long last, she wound up in a psych hospital where she was not in control.

[cymbolichuman]

Moral of the story: Think for yourself. Remember who you are. Believe
in the truth as you know it. Let them think what they want. Don't let them
think you are on to them. Most of all, believe in your perceptions.