How do busy people date (when they’re interested)?

Time constraints intensify the dating and mating process. How can you effectively date when you’re busy? And, how do you date a busy person? Here are the key components that must be in place for romance to occur, and continue.

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The Dating Games Guide: You know you're being played, but what's the game?
And what's your countermove?

The Older Women | Younger Men Dating Guide:
Dating a younger man and wondering if it will last?
Attracted to an older woman and not sure how to make your move?

Rough breakup?
Check out: Breakup Triage; The Cure for Heartache

Wondering how to benefit from life's challenges?
Allowing Magnificence; Living the Expanded Version of Your Life

[slimshadey]

This is so true! Love it! I wish you could put out another video on the same topic in more detail. Like, ways to make a relationship work when you are dating a very busy partner and knowing when to walk away. Etc. Love your video!

[petronecosmetics]

Wow, you're so clear! Right to the point. Easy to understand. Great video!!

[John-jlqx]

Hi Susan,

I am enjoying watching your videos. I love how you come at topics from all angles. Well done! :) I have done plenty of dating in my day and although a "senior", still very young in body & heart. The soul & mind has matured and learned much in life and in relationship. I work at it...as everyone should. On this particular topic I would like to share with you what I am noticing in dating women 50+. You are correct. We can all be busy at times. In fact some folks, women and men, like to fill up their schedule as much as they can, be it with work, hobbies, family, girl/guy time, whatever. What I am observing and running into is many women seem to want to have a man in their life more as a convenience than as a life partner. Someone to fit in when a time slot opens up in that busy schedule of theirs. And....they want exclusivity. To me, that is more like visitation. I can see where someone would fall for someone, start a relationship with them with the hopes that things will change and it will become the relationship that they hope for. One which is more spontaneous and has more frequent time together. Even though the other person expressed what their life was all about, a person in "love" always hopes they can give reasons for that person to change. Then they find them self dragged along forever on this path. I predict they will become so frustrated with this situation all the while working so hard to try and change it. Then they wake up one day and realize they put a heck of a lot more time into the unchanging relationship then they had planned. As Iyanla says "If you want to know the end, look at the beginning". I can see why men simply want to play the field and spend time with a variety of younger women. No attachment, no obligation and no hanging around waiting for busy person to free up some fun time.

[vicky]

Hi Susan. Thank you. Your such a sweetheart.

[ivkamamojkova]

Susan great video! I would also love so much if you extended this particular topic on kids and their biological parents interacting with each other even if one or both are already taken. Let's say that you are in this position of new partner and you have to deal with the fact that there is someone else (biological mother) in the picture all the time. Especially when kids are small it might happen that your partner spend more time with them than with you. How to handle that? You might feel neglected and at the same time you want to be understanding BUT there are these thoughts about you know . ...they have history together, they might one day figure out they should reunite for the sake of kids etc. How to keep your sanity in such situations as a new partner?what is objectively tolerable and what is too much? I know everybody is different but sometimes you might find yourself fighing your own true feelings because you feel like the kid is important and you are selfish for asking something for yourself. Thank you so much

[hello]

Thank you Susan for always giving very good insights.
I met someone a few weeks ago on Tinder. Seems nice, but: just finalized his divorce. He keeps texting me. I told him I want to meet. He said yes but did nothing. Last weekend I asked him directly for a coffee. He gave me some date options and explained him being busy with work and kids. I said maybe I van on one of the days he mentioned, otherwise it is not meant to be. His response: we do have more options after. It does not feel right for me to wait for him. At the other hand I don't want to be impatient, but I am.
Really I don't know what us the best thing to do. My theory has always been: if dating is not his priority, then it is useless. But I am not sure.

[Teacher_Sal]

As the man asking..She's spot on! 😉

[sharathsuma]

Dear Susan,
First of all my apologies for not being able to keep track of your videos of late . Suma had suggested me to stay away from internet ( except for educational purposes
and use it for other purposes once in a month) . She wants me to focus on my studies at the moment and feels that browsing will keep me distracted . She never monitors my usage but I value her suggestions and don't want to disrespect or disobey her so I am just being less frequent over the web .
Thank you for sharing this very important message . Yes its a common problem now and sometimes one or both the partners often gets frustrated when other doesn't give enough attention . In our case being in a senior leadership position Suma leads a very busy life . Every day she leave home by 7.30am to work and get home at 7pm, then work late, answering emails. She need to travel a lot to conferences and meetings, while my internship work is a normal 8:00-to 5pm and, I got a waiver from most of the college classes due to my internship overlapping with my classes . I can extend my working hours to learn a bit more however since she is working late I thought it would be better for me to finish early (I try to utilize my time at office to a maximum hardly wasting any time for browsing or loose talks), pick up her daughter from school, as well as cooking and finishing the chores around the house before Suma returns . I also bond with her daughter Minu and she too helps me with some of the work around the house . I realize that being in a senior leadership position is very demanding and I see there are days when she returns home exhausted . So, never approach her with any complaints and always greet her with a happy face while she returns . Because of her dynamic career we are not able to spend as much time as we would wish to .But we try to compensate for it by utilizing the available time to the max . Friday night she likes to spend time with her friends and unwind herself over a drink . I dont mind that at all . I know it is very important for her . On Saturdays she has asked me to completely focus on my studies and projects . There won't be any disturbance and she will take care of the work at home and cooking aswell as spending time with Minu . However Sunday is our day and how much ever busy we both are we have decided that we both will be spending the day together . Minu will be there, and we three go for outing as a family . We have lots of fun . Sometimes we cook together . When Minu sleeps we make love . Though our lives are busy we adjust our lives accordingly with both of us valuing each others personal growth .
After a month or so I will be appearing for job interviews and Suma is helping me immensely with that .Its really a boon . She asks me to write down the points starting with " tell me about yourself " . She tells me that my answers should be crisp and to the point . She makes me rehearse before her . She has a lot of experience and has conducted many interviews even for the senior professionals . She gives me a lot of advices and sometimes when I don't perform upto the mark she scolds me a lot and make me write or speak the same content several times .
All these events make our life very special .It feels as if we are spending a lot of time together yet not interfering in each others private space .
I hope there is always a way around even when we are busy . Your suggestions are always helpful and I am benefiting a lot from it . I am also extremely lucky to have Suma in my life . Have a nice day, Susan .
Thank you,
Sharath

[MdAbbas-ntjy]

Hy Susan good morning you have a nice day

[robotfreedom]

Thanks for another great video Susan, I have a similar situation, so I dated a girl for the summer things seemed fine but out of nowhere she told me that she couldn't continue because she was so busy and wasn't ready for a relationship I said I understood and backed off that was 6months ago but about to months after she told her feelings it was brought to my attention that she was now in a relationship so I just kept to myself let it be and now just last week she asked someone to pass a message to me for me to contact her, it just confused me because I thought I was over it and that she really had no interest in me at all I'm not sure what to do at this point I haven't contacted her or plan to do so even though I'd really like to hear from her.

[flowerdiva]

Susan, not sure if you have covered this topic, but how do we deal with boyfriend's ex not having fully left the man's life? I'm dealing with this ex that I have not met, but she keeps on meddling in my boyfriend's life and he doesn't even realize it. I don't want to set ultimatums: it's me of her, but I find it a constant irritant that she is still manipulating him. Thank you Susan!

[crisj]

omgg, my time is all over the place, I own a business, I am also going to grad school, I need study time, family time and yet I want to date and I have to find a quality person who is not going to distract and feel bad I'm neglecting them.

[benedictaalfonso]

That person have to find a right lady for the kids, because the kids are very important and we have to take a good care of them and you have to treat them like you gave birth to them

[How.Dare.You.]

Totally. Im dating a pilot with a child so the worst combo 😂

[benedictaalfonso]

Susan that’s peanuts, It’s easy as 123