Family Scapegoat Leaves - Narcissistic Mother Cult

Going no-contact with my narcissistic mother was like leaving a cult, since my father and siblings completely shunned me. In the linked video, I explain 5 things I did to deal with this as part of ongoing recovery from family scapegoating, psychological abuse, and narcissistic abuse.

As a family scapegoat abuse survivor, when I walked away and went no contact with my narcissistic parent, it was a very difficult decision. Toxic family dynamics are difficult to understand, and the smear campaign waged by a narcissist parent against the family scapegoat only compounds scapegoat trauma. The toxic family system makes it very difficult to escape.

The cycle of abuse in a toxic family system is such that when the family scapegoat leaves, the narcissistic parent will smear the scapegoat to everyone, to cover up the toxic family dynamics, and the scapegoat will be shunned just like a person who left a cult.

#narcissisticmother #psychologicalabuse
#scapegoat #narcissisticabusehealing #narcissisticabusesurvivor #narcissisticabuserecoverycoach
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MY BACKSTORY:
This Youtube channel is dedicated to helping survivors. I’m sharing my journey of recovery from:
* narcissistic abuse and psychological abuse (narcissistic mother)
* domestic abuse, domestic violence and emotional abuse (narcissistic husband)
* family scapegoating and toxic family dynamics (toxic family system)

I married a pathological narcissist who was later diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). He used lovebombing and since I was love bombed, I failed to notice the red flags of dating a narcissist. He showed his true narcissistic traits after we were married. I became trauma bonded with my narcissistic spouse, so it was really difficult to break the trauma bond.

My narcissistic husband subjected me to psychological abuse, emotional abuse and domestic violence. I left my violent husband 7 times but took him back 6 times because it was difficult to break the cycle of abuse. Eventually, I had enough of my abusive marriage and finally divorced my narcissistic husband. He pled guilty to domestic violence offences and I began to recover from narcissistic abuse. I broke the cycle of abuse, never returning to domestic violence again.

People often asked me why I kept returning to domestic abuse, and for a long time I found it difficult to explain. However, eventually my psychologist helped me see that I had gone into adulthood with very poor boundaries since my highly narcissistic mother used gaslighting to violate my boundaries. I became the family scapegoat but because I had a trauma bond, even when I became aware that my mother is a narcissist, I found it difficult to walk away.

I know how difficult it is to recover from both domestic abuse and family scapegoat abuse. I had low self-esteem the negative messaging from my narcissist mother led me to internalise unhealthy messages that led me to have negative core beliefs. I showed signs of a dysregulated nervous system (C-PTSD), and was diagnosed with depression and agoraphobia.
As part of my healing and recovery, I have used use the following trauma therapy methods:

* Cognitive behavior therapy (CBT) / traditional counselling
* Eye movement desensitization and reprogramming (EMDR)
* Hypnosis downloads (Hypnotherapy developed by Mark Tyrrel)
* Rapid Transformation Therapy (RTT)
* Somatic Experiencing (SE) developed by Dr Peter Levine and praised by Dr Gabor Mate
* Somatic movement
* Sleep affirmations
* Journalling prompts / self-reflection
* Shadow work (Carl Jung)
* Guided meditations (Dr. Joe Dispenza)
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Voiceovers: I have used a voice-over in this video to protect the privacy of my extended family, many of whom have also experienced abuse.
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IMPORTANT SAFETY MESSAGE: Remember, abuse isn’t always physical and can happen to men or women. Leaving an abusive relationship can increase your risk of harm so make sure to contact your local police if you need help getting out safely. This video isn’t intended to replace therapy, so if you’re struggling then please reach out for help because you don’t need to go it alone. You can talk to a wise friend, contact a support hotline, or call an ambulance.
The information given in this video is general in nature and is not intended to diagnose, treat or prevent any illness, including mental illness, and it is not intended to replace counselling, advice and/or treatment from a registered practitioner of any profession. If experiencing difficulties, you should speak to a professional and in an emergency please go to an emergency room or call your local emergency number.