When the Avoidant Realizes They Lost You | What Happens?

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Transform Your Pain and Grief of a Breakup with: How to Heal From a Breakup & Transform Grief

In this video, Thais Gibson defines what the boomerang effect is and what happens when a dismissive avoidant attachment style realizes they lost you. Discover the 3-step process of navigating a breakup as Thais provides some understanding and useful tips. For more information check out the relevant course above on how to transform your pain and grief from a breakup.

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00:00:00 - Intro
00:00:41 - Carrying a Fear of Commitment
00:01:43 - Feelings Minus Fears
00:03:41 - Melting Iceberg
00:07:53 - What You Can Do To Heal
00:08:00 - Step #1: No Contact
00:09:00 - Step #2: Question Your Stories
00:10:03 - Step #3: Map Out the Next Phase of Life
00:10:36 - Summary / 7-Day Free Trial: How To Heal From A Breakup
00:11:24 - Conclusion

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[ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool]

Have you experienced this before? let us know in the comments:

[dustinquinton]

DA’s get depressed after a breakup. Their partners get depressed during the relationship,

[mariapap]

As harsh as it may sound, people should deal with their own shit before getting romantically involved with other people and hurting them. I don't care WHAT your problem is or in what mess your emotional world is in, that doesn't give you the right to make a mess of my life and emotions. That's so outrageously selfish!

[danielosmon]

What happens when an avoidant realizes they lost you, absolutely nothing. They continue on their journey the same way they did when you met them

[emd]

"I'm in therapy because the ones around me who need it won't get it"

[wendydaniel]

The more you " heal " as an individual, the less tolerance and patience you have putting up with the " up and down", hot and cold" destructive, behaviors of the DA...Keep your dignity and self respect by putting that energy into those who are deserving of you. ❤

[ashleykathryn]

I think these people should stick to 3-6 month relationships and be upfront that that's the most they can invest with one person. It would save a ton of heartache!

[lrose]

A relationship with a DA is so draining. I really feel like I’m walking on eggshells. When I feel any type of emotion, she is ready to call it quits. It’s like I have to mute myself to get along. I’m sooo exhausted

[Candy_Mountain]

I love <sarcasm> how DA’s often create the problem and the conflict between you but then won’t take accountability, show remorse, apologize or change their behavior

[demzwordz]

I moved on from a DA and am now in a committed relationship with a wonderful man.

[bystandersarah]

These are the babies that were left to cry in their crib to “self soothe”. Don’t let your babies “cry it out”, go pick them up and help them so they can be securely attached rather than dismissive avoidant attached.

[monavis]

Notice how selfish they are that even after the breakup, they miss the services you provided SO they never miss you as a person. Call it divine intervention that god loved you enough to remove you from this toxic situationship. Count your blessings and light a candle for the poor new victim who is now taking all the abuse !! This is not called avoidant attachment. It is called avoidant DETACHMENT ! Stay far away from these entities.

[nrktdnx]

A relationship with the DA left me so confused, empty, wanting more, never feeling fulfilled and the indirect communication killed me.

[hatumahoe]

Run! And run fast! I brokeup with a DA on Christmas day. Out of the blue ghosting me for days. Not even sending a message "hey, merry Christmas". OUTTA THE BLUE! You end up feeling like crap. Like you're worth nothing.These ppl are heartless. Mean. Petty. Totally disagree that they don't do it on purpose. They do. They're adults. They can see you're hurting. They just don't care. I despise these ppl.

[tjc]

This video was so needed. My DA ex will always have a place in my heart, I can see and empathise deeply with how much he struggles but after 2 and half years and being ditched twice by text, I can’t put myself through that again. He needs to heal, I wish him peace and I hope some day he is brave enough to let someone in but I deserve more than he has the capacity to give me right now. I choose myself. I’m worth more than a “maybe”. I hope lots of my fellow APs will realise the same thing. Someone out there will value what you have to give (not saying you don’t have work to do too, I know I absolutely do, but don’t stay in a situation that’s hurting you, the other person needs to at least try to meet you in the middle) x

[marioct]

I hope that my avoidant ex experiences a level of suffering so great that he HAS to get help to heal and stop hurting people.

[rainerneumeister]

I’ve only dated a female dismissive avoidant once. Believe me they are not worth it. They are very close to a narcissist in their behaviours. A lot of them are serial cheaters . And my ex avoidant cheated on every one she dated . They also seem to devalue you by picking on your flaws over time.

[ananichi]

Being with an avoidant means anytime you have a negative emotion, they use it as a reason to “leave” oh to “protect” you bc they “ can’t do anything right “
It’s literally hell.

[jessica]

I release the need to prove my worth to ppl who are avoidant. I release all wounds I carry that attracts me to toxic relationships. I am content and all is well.

[Theinsomniac]

Human beings are not toys that you can put on a shelf when you don't feel like being bothered...