Is Your Breakup Actually A Blessing In Disguise?

-----------Will Your Ex Take You Back? Take The Free Quiz Now----------

YouTube! What's up, this is Brad Browning… I'm kind of a big deal. Well, I'm only a big deal if you need breakup advice, marriage help, or if you're desperate to win back your ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend. If that describes your current situation, then you have hit the YouTube jackpot… this video, I'll be explaining how your breakup might actually be a GOOD thing.

Stick with my all the way to #4, because that's the one that I think you'll find most helpful. But first, let's begin with question #1….

#1 - Are the issues that led to your recent breakup CHRONIC, or something that can be fixed?

But sometimes, these issues are fundamental and wont' ever change. Hey, dude out there watching this video -- yeah, you -- your girl has cheated on you 6 times in the past 2 years, do you really think there won't be a seventh time? Do you want to take that chance?

What about if you partner is certain that they NEVER want kids, and won't ever live anywhere outside of their hometown. If those aren't compromises you can live with forever, if you are 100% committed to having children, or don't like the idea of living out the rest of your days in Gary, Indiana…. Be honest and decide if you'll ever be able to fix the problems that plagued your relationship.

#2 - Can you picture yourself with your ex in the future? A year from now? Ten years?

Picture yourself, and what your life will look like, down the road… 6 months, a year, a decade… is your ex in that picture?

Obviously there's no simple or "correct" answer to those questions, and quite frankly sost of you watching won't have this kind of concern with your situation. But sometimes, the issues are just too overwhelming to realistically have a future together. Make sure you're being realistic about your future and who you want to be with months or years down the road.

#3 - How often did you and your ex argue?

Think back to before the breakup, when you were still together… how often did you have arguments? What were they about? How intense were they? Did you sometimes argue for no reason, or over small things?

Studies have shown that while a certain amount of arguing is normal and expected, some couples have personality clashes or are both particularly stubborn and prone to explosive arguments all the time.

#4 - Do you miss your ex specifically, or do you miss having a partner or being in a relationship?

Maybe you've confused the source of the heartache and sadness you've felt since the breakup…. Maybe you don't really miss your ex as much as you miss being in a relationship. This is a very common mistake that quite a few of my clients make, and it's especially common for younger people with less experience dating or being in relationships. It's also often rooted in an fear of loneliness that almost everyone has deep down, whether they realize it or not…. Nobody wants to be alone, feel unwanted, or not have a partner to share their life with. But that doesn't mean you should stay in a relationship that's not working, or isn't ever going to work.

And here's a bonus question for you… #5 - Have you taken my free quiz yet?

THANK YOU for watching, THANK YOU for subscribing to my channel, as I'm sure you already have…. If not, what are you waiting for? Click subscribe and click that little bell icon to get notified when I release future videos.

[tonyabeck-hoes]

God bless you brad your a relationship saint very comforting and reassuring

[nikhilbiswas]

Heartbreaks are temporary but Brad Browning is permanent.

[christiancarr]

Tbh the break up has made me open my mind and eyes and look around and just take sometime to myself. I still love her and want her back but I know now that I don't necessarily need her to be happy

[motorcitysobie]

I've been battling addiction for quite some time. I recently lost someone I truly care about because of my lying and my addiction. What really hurts is I'm honestly trying to get help and have been seeing a counselor / therapist along with monthly doctor visits to keep me on track. But I must say your videos have helped me more then I could ever put into words. Before I started watching your videos I was extremely depressed but since I started watching I'm at peace. I've never commented on a video on YouTube but I just wanted to say how much I appreciate your videos. From the bottom of my heart thank you. You truly are a blessing and the world needs more people like you.

[renyagami]

I miss being in a relation, having a partner to kiss & hug...

[tanganbabyrosak]

Brad browning, you're the boss..I love all your videos.. All your advice are working

[akhiltesla]

After a long introspection... I would say yes! It's a blessing!

[RyRyH]

Hey brad. All your videos keep helping me deal with my break up. Keep up the great work. I’m not sure how I feel about trying to win back for my ego or because I love her but question 4 hit home and it’s true. I’m not sure I miss her or the companionship. There is love there but I’m letting her go. This break up shook me to the core. And your videos have given me something to hold on to and start clawing my way out of the hole that I feel I been in. It’s been 4 weeks since the break up and 1 week since no contact.

[nobles]

Good video. These are very important questions everyone should ask themselves in my opinion. Especially before anything is done that might damage the possibility of getting back together.
Great advice!

[arunsontakke]

Happened with me Brad.. thanks for helping me through it...!!

[letough]

Brad...
I was in a relationship for for a little more than two years and.
It's always been very chaotic from the get-go. I was often the one who tried to compromise and that led to the point of controlling and complete lack of respect from her part till I started to set limitations after a quick break this February.
We broke up for good last week when she, childishly, threw another tantrum when I didn't let her control me. Yes, the quarantine definitely has a part in it but at the end of the day she's too immature and we fit all the four items you pose on this video.
The breakup is for real this time and I feel like it in my bones.
Now...here's the thing...she has a 4 year old son who I deeply love (he loves me the same way). I became his 2nd father. For the last 6 months or so he was probably the biggest reason why I stayed on the relationship although I loved her very much(I don't know if I still do though... it's certainly different now).
She just sent me one of those "I hate you" texts(literally text since I blocked her everywhere).
I ignored it.
I'm not planning to talk to her anytime soon and I'm willing to have a me time and afford to be selfish since I've been invested on making this relationship for almost three years however I do want to keep a connection with the boy.
How do I equate this in ur opinion?
Should I just let it fade out for a bit and then talk to her in two or three months time or after "no contact" we can start a conversation to settle things down?

[rg]

I'm sure it was never right.
Between my gut telling me something is going on and other things dish it has been doom from day one. Too overwhelmed and too tired to see any positive outcome of our marriage

[jasonparedes]

Hey Brad, I stumbled upon your content a little earlier today & I must say I am in dire need of your expert opinion to help cope with what I've been dealing with for past 24 hours. Just yesterday I broke up with my girlfriend who I've been with for 3 years and to be honest, it was the most difficult and heartbreaking thing I've ever had to do. To give you an idea, she suffers from anxiety and depression which she has dealt with from her teenage years up until now. She is a beautiful 23 year old who I fell deeply in love with during our time together and is unlike anyone I've ever been with before. I've definitely been in my fair share of relationships here and there over the years (the 2 main ones prior being 5 yrs and slighter under 2 years respectively) but none have made me feel the way this one did, not by a long shot. Long story short, I broke up with her yesterday night. My fundamental reason for the break up was that after almost 3 years within the relationship, she would not seek out help for her depression which resulted in unconsciously pushing me away and having the sense of truly being alone. I read numerous articles on the subject, watched several seminars online and brought up seeing a psychiatrist several times. I can't claim to be an expert on the subject but I do understand that depression has to be one of the toughest things a person has to deal with which is why I never forced her to do anything she did not want to. Progress not perfection, that's an idea I strongly live by in any relationship. The problem was that there was 0 progress in that front, instead she went for instant gratifications (concerts, minor indulgences, etc.) and setting aside this monumental issue rather than seeking out the help she desperately needed. I would be lying if said it wasn't emotionally exhausting but I never felt a sense of having to be there, quite the opposite. I am not coping very well with the choice I have made, I really need advise. Have I done the right thing? As much as I wish I could be able to be the man she deserves and needs I just couldn't be that because of that halt in progression and it breaks my heart. I do not think of myself as a saint or "knight in shinning" armor by any means but I do still love this girl.

[someguy]

Bout the argument part
We literally never had a fight. Like the most heated argument was like raising our voices and quickly dishing out arguments for each others standpoint. Only to end after 10-15 min and coming to a satisfiying conclusion where both are happy

[veritasvincit]

I married and was divorced by a hypergamous woman.
We knew each other from the ages of 3 to 16.
Met again aged 42.
She had a profile I would not usually go near but gave her the credence because of our shared youth. Besides, once you're in your 40s you accept that everyone is entitled to a past.
What is a hypergamous woman?
1)Doesnt work.
2)Has children often with different partners.
3)Only feels love towards the child she carried for nine months.
4)All men are dispensable including the children's father(s).
5)As soon as the next best option becomes available she'll move on and take it.
Her drive is to get her and children's needs met.

I got caught out.
We mutually decided before marriage that she would look after the household while I did shifts in a foundry to pay for it all.
Eventually, zero housework was being done and all she wanted to do was to go off gallivanting out dancing and engaging in various other social engagements.
Once I remonstrated she issued me with a divorce and moved on the the next easiest available option.
Not the first time she's done it either as I found out later.
I was too trusting.
Imagine my surprise to read in the divorce proceedings that I was an aggressive and controlling bully that she and the children were in mortal fear of.
She got her little girl to say the same because as we all know, little girls do and say exactly what mommy tells them to.
Beware gentlemen.
These women are out there and they're very convincing. I got fooled and I don't consider myself to be a particularly slow minded dullard.
Trusting, yes.
Anyway, it's human nature to love someone you've been close to and had great times with.
When the betrayal rug gets pulled from under you it's still natural to love them.
However, these people are not governed by the same morals, values and decency as most.
I was destroyed when I was suddenly locked out of her life.
Truth is that it was the best thing to happen to me.
My virtues and values are appreciated elsewhere now.
As for my ex wife? Well, she'll do it again. It's a strategy that clearly works and is backed up by the welfare state and the gynocentric divorce courts. She'll do the same as she did to me and her first husband to someone else but the law of averages and human nature suggest that at some point someone will pull the knife out that she backstabbed them with and use it on her figuratively speaking. That makes me very sad.

[pranavkmishra]

Brad if possible please make a video on long distance relationship.

[paaul]

The best one yet, great food for thought.

[LetsdoitK]

Hey Brad, please help. Thank you for all your videos. My question is how after NC should I talk to my ex? We were living together for over 6 years, we know each other very well. He asked me for time to think 2 years ago but he was massaging me every now and then. I applied NC for few months, I could noticed he got angry but in the end after 6 months sent me very long email with pictures of us saying that he was wrong and he wanted to meet. It took me few days but I said yes and I met with him. It was really bizzard meeting, he was asking a lot of questions about me, he was impressed that I was doing relly well. He never mentioned about getting back together but I thought that was ok as it is better retake it slowly. Then I didn't hear from him for few months, then he contacted me again and then I asked him to meet and ask him what was going on. We had a big fight as he said that he still is not sure, and that email wasn't really what I thought and I should keep doing my life.I was so upset. After 2 days he waited for me on the street and said that he perfectly remember how amazing I am and he first need to get better as i did. We didn't contact each other for 5 months and then he reached out for Christmas again with very long email but I didn't answer, so he reached me out again and again and wanted to meet. I repilied saying that I had nothing to talk with him. 2 months later he wrote again to meet, I said no. Since then I think he applied NC rule. He wrote me 3 weeks ago but I noticed that if I was cold he was cold as well but in the end we had nice chat about travels and our lifes generally. He tried to explain that he didn't contact me lately because he noticed I didn't want it so he didn't want to be annoying. I really do not know what to do and how to behave, because if I am not even cold just neutral he steps away but I am afraid of being freindly because based on my experience from last year he can understand this as he still has time and I am available but on the other hand we should reconnect again, so how to do it without being friendly???? - it is too much game for me! :( I am sorry for this being so long but I am really confused and need
advice.

[victoriae]

Hi Brad. So my ex broke up with me a little over 2 weeks ago and we've been together for about 4 years. He broke up with me because he said that he felt like we were going in different directions, and then said that he thinks that we should work on ourselves, but then also went to say that he was not ready for a relationship...? Which confused me because we have been together for a few years and were serious. We were both happy as well and the relationship as a whole was positive. I haven't contacted him, but I saw him a few days ago a we had a nice conversation (we don't hate each other). He even complimented me and said I looked nice. I'm just confused is he contridicting himself?

[kasiak]

My ex bf broke up with me over a month ago after a severe argument. We were together for almost a year. I really loved him and begged and pleaded him for getting back with me. After a few days he agreed to try once again but it wasn't the same as it was before. He wasn't eager to text or meet with me, he was cold and finally he broke up after a few days. I begged and pleaded again but he didn't want to be with me again and after a few days he blocked me on Facebook. We haven't contacted since. At the beginning I was really depressed and wanted to get him back, but then I felt relieved. I hadn't been happy in this relationship for the last few months, actually. And even though I was still in love with him, I realised that I he wasn't a man I'd like to be with. He had one feature that completly disqualified him as a partner and because of that feature I was so unhappy in that relationship - he was a mama's boy. I wanted many times to break up with him but I couldn't do it because I loved him so much and hoped he'd change, even though I'd heard many times mama's boys don't change. Now I wouldn't want to be with him even if he was the last man on Earth. All girls and women who read it, NEVER date a mama's boy, they're horrible partners. Thank God it ended so soon and I didn't waste my life for such a man.