Midweek with Dr. C- Narcissism And Your Compassion Fatigue

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Dr. Les Carter is a best selling author and therapist who has semi-retired to Waco, TX. In the past 40+ years he has conducted more than 65,000 counseling sessions and many workshops and seminars. He specializes in anger management and narcissistic personality disorder.

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[karolemcaninch]

When fatigue wins over compassion, that's a sign for us to move away, and forward.

[aaronkwolfe]

Compassion fatigue for a person who has loads of compassion leaves a deep emptiness. Fill your reservoir and be compassionate to those who can/will benefit from it. This takes understanding.

[tanyawhitman]

I didn't know the narcissist in my life was a narcissist until about 2 months ago. She called me constantly to complain and I always listened and tried to cheer her up to no avail. I had been a listening ear for over 4 years. I had a pinched nerve in my neck for that 4 years and when I stopped speaking to her my pinch nerve pain went away and has not come back. I didn't realize the negativity was causing me physical pain until the contact with her stopped. I'm so grateful not to be in pain any longer and I feel lighter and so much more joyful. Thank you for educating us on this topic, it's been so valuable to me.

[Hatbox]

I don't know that I had loads of compassion for my ex narc, but I was worn out from his constant demands. You couldn't do enough for the guy. His neediness caused fatigue.

[t_nels]

Dr Carter,
You mean everything to us. You are loved and so appreciated. This vacation is essential. Enjoy.
It also gives us time to watch your play lists and hopefully take advantage of one of your courses.
Thank you for being with us through the holidays. 🌹

[tbunnyshy]

Its like watching your loved ones on a sinking ship. They are determined to stay aboard and they are unreachable. 19:42 - be still my heart, it hurts but its the truth. “They are committed to their own damaged ingredients”. It hurts that no amount of empathy will reach their hearts. The family system is committed to the dysfunction at all costs.

[teddyrascal]

Brother, ive been watching you for years. Never gets old.

[margaretgreason]

Animals are more humane than some people ❤

[kathythrasher]

I am fatigued so I did go 98% no contact with a family member . After 70 years 😮I understand change is not coming 😅

[rebeccasmith]

Gus is amazing!! He was meant for you.

[suelindsey]

Equality fatigue is so right on and there’s nothing I can do about it😢

[notaclue]

For me I just refuse to be manipulated but I like to think I can use compassion with discernment. I feel no guilt at all about that.

[PTPilot]

Les, your passion to help, educate, validate and your empathy toward this subject is truly amazing! You’ve been a calm voice of reason and knowledge for me for the past 8+ months through this journey from a suspected covert. You truly are appreciated. THANK YOU!!!!
And to the subject matter, yes I felt completely drained of compassion and empathy. Felt empty in every sense of the word.

[margaretgreason]

It took me 31 years to get what you're talking about Dr. C!

[lyndabrown]

"Compassion Fatigue"...well, who knew there was a term for what I am feeling at this point in time?! It only took me 30+ years of "banging my head against a brick wall" so to speak, just because I have "the helper" syndrome real bad. However, today, I have had enough "misery, " and even though "misery loves company, " I can no longer 'help' the narcissist live life at my expense. I understand how frustrating it must have been for you, Dr. C, in getting this point across while in your practice, but "you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink." Unfortunately, one has to have their limit of misery before they 'see' things differently; and once they see it, they can 'unsee' it. And then one can finally "live and learn" and "do better"... which is where I am finally at.

Also, I have always believed that dogs are very intuitive when it comes to sensing or knowing good people or bad people. Dogs are very intuitive with people's emotions, too. Whenever I cry, my dogs always immediately come close enough to my face to lick my tears away as if to tell me that it's going to be okay. And I am sure others have had the same experience with their dogs.

As for the relationship of the narcissistic mother and daughter part of this video, I thought you were talking about my cousin. She is in exactly the same position of now being so much older and understanding how and why her mother was so horrible to her as a young girl. She finally does feel so much better going no contact, but more importantly, the understanding that it wasn't her all along that was damaged. That was her mother. I hope that other woman you spoke of, Dr. C, will finally release any guilt she has, too.

I am so happy that I learned about "Compassion Fatigue" today. Thank you for furthering my education about everything that goes along with narcissists and narcissism, and please keep these videos coming, Dr. C. Enjoy your holiday next week, and please give Gus a hug for me! 😊❤

[elainesmith]

Dr. C. Enjoy your time off! R&R we all need!❤
I suffered from empathy fatigue working in health care for yrs ...I thought. My fatigue actuall came from the narcissist I was married to and his crazy family, I later realized....they had drained me.

[dianaschramer]

The loneliness and grief are so heavy at times 😔

[fred.k]

Dr.C enjoy your time off take care please, see you!🙏

[snowbear]

I used to be that person who would ring people and complain. I was so full of pain. I just had to talk. But I alienated a lot of people. I was not malicious, just full of pain. I also was sick of people correcting me all the time and telling me off. So I felt that having others listen to me and support me was a way they could help me rather than put me down by giving unsolicited advice.

[heathermixson]

Yes, you most definitely get to the UGH feeling by just the mere thought of them. The truest form of complete energy draining: narcissists.

**but so refreshing when they are not around!!!!**