Why do we love people who don’t love us back?

Sam King writes, “Do you think you can make us a video regarding why do we still love people who do not love us back ??????? I love your work, you are awesome in every way. “ Learn how you can turn the pain into strength by spinning a win from your loss.

The Dating Games Guide: You know you're being played, but what's the game?
And what's your countermove?

The Older Women | Younger Men Dating Guide:
Dating a younger man and wondering if it will last?
Attracted to an older woman and not sure how to make your move?

Rough breakup?
Check out: Breakup Triage; The Cure for Heartache

Wondering how to benefit from life's challenges?
Allowing Magnificence; Living the Expanded Version of Your Life

[seeflow]

IMO, we often love the fantasy of a person and not necessarily the reality that love is not being reciprocated by that person.

[gaillewis]

Too many of us treat love as a task that it must be earned, worked for, or fought for through strife. If we are learning an instrument, language, new work skill, new life skill, practice will make perfect or at least better. If we keep pouring our time, effort, energy and emotions into people as if they were an obtainable level of ability, we will always be disappointed. People either want us or they don't. It's not like training for a 10K where if we discipline ourselves, we can actually do it. Despite what everybody keeps saying about fight, work, put in constant effort, it shouldn't be like that. Just ask a little child how hard it is to love their parents, pets, and friends at school. If you have to win someone over, they are the wrong one.

Would you keep a job, car, apartment, shoes or phone that didn't meet your needs or was harmful to your well being? Don't keep people either, since they aren't genuinely yours in the first place. RUN.

[isabellamelie]

Is it really love when someone does not love you back or even hurt you? Hummm, sometimes I feel it is low self-esteem that keeps us hooked to someone that is not for us.

[erikamussey]

This video made me cry because this is my exact situation. I love this guy and I only realized it after he was taken. He opened up a feeling in me that I hadn't felt in a long time. I'm now understanding that it's not meant to be but that doesn't make it hurt any less unfortunately. I just hope that one day I can get past this hurt and finally be happy with the one who was meant for me.

[taralangton]

Not always a partner. Sometimes it's a "good" friend.

[thelovely]

its just not fair that he activated my heart but didn't feel the same way but I will take the lesson and move on

[yanir]

"Direct your love away from them and onto someone who may be better for your future" wish it was easier said than done but it sure is an ongoing process.

[katherinegoodacre]

I have Loved and not Received Love because I wanted to "Activate their Heart" so that they could Love.
Loving unselfishly is a Gift.

[cherylcuttineau]

My love interest came to activate and re-awaken my desire for love and a committed long-term partnership. At 66 I was happily single and then fell suddenly in love with someone who is emotionally unavailable. I am just now realizing this relationship has ended up in a ditch and no amount of wishing, hoping and LOA was going to change it the way I wanted. As Shakespeare once said, “love makes fools of us all.”

[marianna]

Susan I must admit, that hurt a lot. The more I keep on loving this person, the more I feel like I can’t let go the idea of us being together, being something together. You asked ‘what did they bring to your lives?’ and the first thing that came into my mind was ‘understanding’. He literally helped me (involuntarily of course) to understand and accept myself. Embrace feelings I had rejected in the very first place. I felt lonely and abandoned but then I saw him, a little broken bird trying to deceive anybody else by impressing them with some mannerism or bragging about nothing in particular. I am more than aware of the fact that these are all things I’ve come up with on my own. And I know that I’m falling into a spiral of self-deception just for the sake of love. I felt a deep and weird connection on a psychological and emotional level I’ve never NEVER felt before. I know it’s all in my mind, but I’d give away everything just to tell him everything I feel, give him the love I think he deserves. I should let go, but something bigger is holding me back... and the craziest thing is that I know we’re not meant to be together. We’re on two different level, we wouldn’t be good as a couple. Still, I feel connected to this person..

[JAMANIJAMANI]

I wish it wasn't in my nature to love...life would be much easier.

[tuanlocchopper]

eventhough she doesn't love me back, I'm glad I met her 🙂

[chilloften]

The gift I got....love self over others and much much more than others...ALWAYS.

[casperinsight]

Sometimes people open your heart
They hold the key to unlock your heart
but are not the person to share your love
They are just the catalyst
They walk you home and kiss you goodbye

[catlady]

What a great way to look at things. This guy was the first person I opened my heart to serval years after an abusive relationship. While this one wasn't what I thought it would be, this guy showed me I can care about a man again. He also showed me some fun times I never would have had. It's sad things aren't what I thought they would be and yes I'm heartbroken and trying to let go but this video helped.

[queenofswords]

Thank you Susan. This helps me get over someone I wanted but knew I could never have. The gift was a revival of my passion.

[stephaniemendez]

Sometimes it's just being addicted to bad relationships, which I finally realize is my problem!!! Doing the 12 steps, but still love to hear your videos

[athanasiatzr]

Your talk is so soothing to the heart of many people and you are empowering but nowadays in our society there is no genuine love that lasts and we must realise that if we want to stay sane ....it is a real battleship about who will quit the other person first ...kisses

[ShelleyG]

Hi Susan it’s been 18 months since my last heartbreak and this video is the one that finally helps me to move on. I had a few experiences that were good and I can accept that it wasn’t all bad. You’re a gem. Thank you for the clarity.

[Storm.]

I learned recently, that the things we love in a relationship, what makes one feel happy...are ones one positive traits that is brought up in connection with another..and even when they don't want us, those special traits we had with them, is OURS, which we will always have.. Thank you, this reminded me of that❤