How to Help Someone With Depression: 32 Tips for When They Don't Want to Talk: Depression Skills #2

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Depression can be debilitating, and when your friend, spouse, child, or someone else you care about has depression, you want to know how to help them. But what if they don't want to talk about it? You want to know how to help them anyway!

In this video, I teach 32 ways to help someone with depression that don't require you to talk about depression! These skills are essential for friends and parents of someone who is depressed.

Therapy in a Nutshell, LLC, and the information provided by Emma McAdam are solely intended for informational and entertainment purposes and are not a substitute for advice, diagnosis, or treatment regarding medical or mental health conditions. Although Emma McAdam is a licensed marriage and family therapist, the views expressed on this site or any related content should not be taken for medical or psychiatric advice. Always consult your physician before making any decisions related to your physical or mental health.

About Me:
I’m Emma McAdam. I’m a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and I have worked in various settings of change and growth since 2004. My experience includes juvenile corrections, adventure therapy programs, wilderness therapy programs, an eating disorder treatment center, a residential treatment center, and I currently work in an outpatient therapy clinic.

In therapy I use a combination of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Systems Theory, positive psychology, and a bio-psycho-social approach to treating mental illness and other challenges we all face in life. The ideas from my videos are frequently adapted from multiple sources. Many of them come from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, especially the work of Steven Hayes, Jason Luoma, and Russ Harris. The sections on stress and the mind-body connection derive from the work of Stephen Porges (the Polyvagal theory), Peter Levine (Somatic Experiencing) Francine Shapiro (EMDR), and Bessel Van Der Kolk. I also rely heavily on the work of the Arbinger institute for my overall understanding of our ability to choose our life's direction.

Copyright Therapy in a Nutshell, LLC
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[kevinfeliciano]

Seeing your loved ones suffer from this kind of illness is so hard.

[tomlowe]

I imagine most people on this are watching it because they're trying to help someone or want to know what to do incase they need to help someone in the future so I'm gonna say what always works for me, when you're helping someone you have to show them that you care, tell them you won't let them go until you are certain they're ok, don't make them feel under pressure but make them feel that opening to you is the best thing to do and keep it between yourselves and tell them you're always there for them and mean it

[Imtoobusyslayingrn]

I have a boyfriend struggling with this and I just don’t want to lose him and I want to help him find a brighter path and I want to let him know that things will get better

[EmanuelNhemachena-rmzj]

My gf going through this im trying my best to help her its so painful.

[Andrew-uhwf]

Dad I’m trying my best to help you I hope you can be okay just know I love you and I’m here for you just as you are here for me

[jaecarter]

This kinda made me cry, lol. I am going thru a depression phase myself. And I am seeing things Anxiety symptoms in my little sister and I just want her to let go. Of things. I wanna be the best older sister .. thank you

[imaunicorn]

My brother is suffering from depression and I want to help him because our parents doesnt believe he's not fine :( Thank you for this video!

[concertsintoronto]

I’m going through this with my bf. He doesn’t want to open up and I respect that some ppl like to figure things out on their own. I’ve given so many opportunities to talk about it and created an environment where it’s non judgemental and patient. I didn’t force it as much as I want to help, that’s his decision. I just tell him I’m here for him and he knows that. I really hope he gets professional help soon because it’s hurts to see him like this.

[jesscha]

I watched this video to help myself, more or less. As someone with depression, I find it so inspiring to look through the comments and see so many people who genuinely want to help (i don’t have much of that in my own life). Honestly, the person dealing with depression wants space but at the same time knowing they have people that care about them and are willing to listen or help out whenever needed; it is Everything. Feeling depressed, feels lonely if no one is around that cares to help, but the opposite (someone wanting to over help or “fix it”) is also overwhelming. Anyway, just literally spending time with them, even if its in silence means the world to them, i promise (even if they don’t show it) 💛

[thesalonicacastro]

Thank you 😣😭
I don't want to give up for my boyfriend. 💖
I hope this will help me to understand him more.

[d.w.stratton]

My partner has just been breaking down seemingly out of nowhere and having these awful, silent, body-shaking sobs. Just started sobbing in the grocery store today, then again at home. When asked what's wrong, their answer is "nothing in particular" or "I don't want to talk about it". I feel like I'm doing at least 15 or 20 of the things in this list and it is just so maddening because it feels like they never feel better and never seen to notice or appreciate it benefit from my efforts so it just feels like I'm spinning my wheels. I don't mean to make it about me, but it feels like I'm doing the same things over and over again and expecting a different result. At least today they finally said they would be willing to see a psychiatrist to talk about getting help with this. I'm worried about what happens if that doesn't help them. Please keep my partner in your thoughts, won't you?

[haphuongnguyen]

I never went through something as near as depression but i already felt so bad (suicidal thoughts, doubting self-worth, ...) I get it when you say you feel like you wanna end everything.
It just feels so helpless seeing someone you know going through things like that. I just hope that someday i might be able to help people who are struggling with mental illnesses.
Please remember: You are loved. You are enough ❤️

[Anemyya]

My friend is currently in a depressive episode and they told me, that they don't want to talk about it. So I let them be. I text them every morning, telling them that they should rest if they feel like it, I tell them that I'm always here for them. They texted me today and said thank you.
If someone doesn't want to show you their wound, give them a hug. You can't force them to show you but you can make them feel less alone. Just don't be obnoxious

[felyciaed]

I've been listening to my sister alot, she's the kind of person who talks about her deppression in a joking manner. She says that she doesn't want help nor want to talk about it, I still worry for her though. So thankyou for the video, she's not much of an outdoors person but I'll try to follow most of these when hanging out with her. To everyone searching this video up for someone they care about, I'm rooting for you!

[homoerotic]

Thank you so much for this video, and all your others but I love how you made this one for the loved one of a depressed person helping give ideas on how to get better, or at least make it better. ☮️💖🌞

[megarayquaza]

And 14 year olds pretend that depression is the Coolest Thing

[YourIngrownToenail]

With the coronavirus happening, i'm just gonna send funny tiktoks and keep reminding her that she's actually not invisible. That a lot of people sees her and love her.

[carpenterfamily]

Really great topic and tips ~ so many times people who are hurting don’t want to talk.
But obviously we love and want to help them. 💕

[foodiewaalafood]

Extremely helpful video. Very precise with a variety of things to do with someone who is depressed and not willing to talk. Keep up the excellent work 👌👍

[jokerfacexiii]

My sister most likely has depression. My mother me, and my older sister went through our younger fazes of this and think my little sister is going through this now. Thank you. My mother is coming to me for advice because I'm the empath and basically life coach of the family.