I’m JEALOUS of my Therapist's other Clients? [CC English & Español] | Kati Morton

Why am I jealous of my therapist having other clients? Now this can happen for many specific reasons, but there is really only one root reason to explain why we could feel this way. That is: attachment in childhood. Could be due to trauma or emotionally unavailable parents. This can be triggered by therapy because it could be the first place you have felt safe talking, sharing your real feelings, and most of all, being heard and understood by another person. That’s why transference is so common in therapy. Just think about it, if you were never listened to, cared for or validated, when we find a person who does even one of those things we can never want them to go away. It may feel like we have found something extra special and that can only be ours. We don’t want to share for fear that they will leave us, and that’s what causes that feeling of jealousy.
While I truly believe that transference is the root most often that causes this, I also think confidence plays a role. If we don’t think we are good enough, or even worthy of care and support, we may worry that our therapist is going to feel the same. Or we can worry that another patient may take away from their time with us.
Whatever the reason it’s important that we talk about this with our therapist. Let him or her know what you are feeling and what’s coming up for you. You could even let them know why you think it’s happening, and help them guide you and support you through it. Because in all honesty, the jealousy isn’t the real problem, it’s just a symptom of the real issue.

I'm Kati Morton, a licensed therapist making Mental Health videos!
#katimorton #therapist #therapy

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[freethegays]

How does she manage to put out the exact video I need everytime. Like its starting to get weird Kati.

[avabaumann]

I love how she responds to our concerns and makes videos that I’ve seen people suggest

[mlisa]

I have always felt ashamed for feeling jealous of other people going to my therapist. Thank you for addressing this and speaking out because I’ve been keeping this in and avoiding my therapist which isn’t a healthy thing but discussing this with my therapist really scares me

[malcolmwhitmore]

I love the “welcome!” Whenever she does the intro 😂❤️ I can’t help but say it along!

[bookish]

I get jealous when any female in a position of care towards me shows care towards someone else.... teachers, friends, employers. But I don’t get jealous of my therapist’s other clients. I think it’s because part of my knows it’s there job to care so I don’t attach as easily.

[OhiChicken]

This was oddly specific and perfectly timed. I went to leave my therapist office today and his next client was waiting. I felt very strange and hated the feeling it brought on. This video helped, thanks.

[ciaramcalary]

i know it’s irrelevant, but... i’m really scared to tell anybody about my bad days or negative thoughts but i don’t want any attention at all, i hate the thought of even thinking that there might be something wrong with me and i really don’t want to be seen as an attention seeker, which is a very common first assumption in my school. it’s come to the point where it’s really hard getting through the full day bottling all of this up but idk what to do tbh

[caseyprice]

when i see my therapist walk out of her office with other client's it makes me go crazy or even when she mentions other clients because i want to be her favorite

[sheppak]

I was seeing a therapist for a few months. I found when I spiraled into a worse depression and stopped booking sessions on my own, that my therapist never reached out to me, or questioned why I cancelled my last session without an explanation. I thought therapy would help me, but that was the second therapist to leave me hanging on appointments and I never felt comfortable opening up to because I felt like a paycheck, not a patient. I wish I could find a therapist who seems to care as much as you do.

[josephrogers]

Some time ago when I worked with a therapist, I reached out my hand as a greeting, and she turned away. I figured it was probably boundaries and didn't think much of it. 2 weeks later, I see her hugging another client. The client was thanking her for her help. I wasn't jealous, but confused. She could hug another client but not even shake my hand? When I met with other therapists, they would actually reach their hand out to me and introduce themselves. I guess therapists prefer some clients over others. But it's not worth overthinking.

[torihoover]

I don’t even have a therapist and i’m already jealous of other clients. I need a therapist. I feel like therapists don’t actually care, you are paying them to listen and just do their job. it’s not like having someone in real life care about you. does anyone else feel that way? or am I wrong and just over thinking?

[TheDarcij]

I am SO attached to my therapist and we have talked about it a few times. She is so kind and patient and it does hurt knowing she has other clients but I also know the care she has for me is genuine because she is such a genuine person and so that one hour to me is so special.
I need to talk to her about my attachment more but I fear that if I really tell her the extent of it it will scare her or be too much for her therefore causing her to stop working with me.

[jiyaswtu]

Hey kati. I've been meaning to talk to you just so I can thank you, I've suffering GAD for five years now and watching your videos makes me wanna reach out and get help.
And I did while watching your videos and thinking about your words and keeping in mind that it's okay to feel that but it's not okay to hold on to it. Thank you so much just know that you're being the reason why most of your followers is seeking help. Keep up the good work.

[EricBZink]

That is something that is so true because I know personally I wanted all the attention and help at times, it does not work that way and we have to realize its a we thing! Love the video and love what these do for my inspiration and my channel for video ideas! Appreciate what you do more than you know!

[bubblysmile]

2:20 !!! I always get really upset, lots of crying and thoughts about them hating me or that they'll leave me. I always try to remind myself that its not about me and that they have a good reason as to why they had to cancel.

[NMierLaVeau]

5:20 seconds unlocked why I have struggled for years with my muted jealousy. Thank you!

[emmablackwell]

I've been seeing my therapist for 11 weeks and doing CBT and it's honestly really helpful. She's so different to my other ones, she listens to me and genuinely tries to understand and give me great advice. I'm so glad I found her and your videos helped me ask for help so thankyou for everything. You're amazing, loved this video &Love all your videos xoxox

[an-chriventer]

Thank you for this amazing topic, Kati!❤🤗😃😊

[cmayblack]

I’m glad someone asked this question because I’ve been feeling like this too! Thank you to the person that asked it x

[gabrielletyler]

QUESTION: I finally decided it’s time for me to go to therapy BUT I feel guilty about spilling all my crap on one human being. How do I not feel guilty about seeing a therapist?