The UNDETECTABLE way vulnerable narcissists love bomb

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DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.

THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.
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"You're the only person I can talk to about this". Said the vulnerable narcissist to everyone they talk to.

inthehouse
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This is why I am afraid to ever date again. They seem like normal people at first. If I hear a victim story it's a big red flag now. Healed people talk about how they are fixing it and how they have healed and how they took responsibility. This is such important knowledge.

justines
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The idea of "not leaving or giving up on someone when they are down" really hits home. I thought I could save him. I thought I could love him enough to change his life and shine a light on him. I ended up losing my friends, family and self worth in the process.

melmo
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I married a vulnerable narcissist. I thought he was a smart safe person who just wasn’t assertive enough to achieve their goals. After 15 years, I didn’t understand what was happening to me, but I knew that living with him was killing me. I was a shell of a person. 5 years later and I’m finally starting to recover.

joyinthecenter
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First red flag: You will witness/experience the passive aggressive behavior. They make it harder to leave because they will weaponize your empathy against you. Their "Vulnerability" is actually repressed anger. That was another red flag: anger issues.

lilrodz
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My experience with vulnerable narcissists is that contempt rolls off them in waves. They can't hide their bitterness and their hate. Listening to their negativity is exhausting.

kristins
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THE COMPLAINING!!! It is the vampiric sucker of life and all joy.

therealJamieJoy
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The circular arguments are what gets me. Recycles the same nonsense month after month year after year.

kanunut
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The uniqueness of this situation is that for many years I didn’t see “love bombing” phase from the covert narcissist. I thought that I’m the one who is “love-bombing”. I felt that I need to help them emotionally, financially, psychologically - I gave them all my resources. Love bombing from covert narcissist- is their story in very beginning, when they represent themselves as almost saint human, who didn’t succeed in life because of their humbleness. This was the most seductive and exquisite love bombing.

IrinaVanRonkel
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"And then you look up and realize you're doing all the ...work in the relationship." Yup, that sums it up! Anything you ask them about gets scoffed at, treated with contempt.

korab.
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"No matter how much empathy, or no matter how many caring ears you offer them, they will forever seem stuck in a victimized place, and can't seem to move forward from that mindset." This is... someone I'm close to in my family right now. I thought she just needed to get things off her chest, but now I'm realizing, after 2 years of listening to her complain, that it will never come off her chest. In fact, I'm beginning to think she likes it this way.

einahsirro
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Narcissist label gets thrown around a lot these days. There are people who actually do need help and fail to launch because of undiagnosed ADHD, anxiety/depressive disorders, codependency, learned helplessness and OCD/religious trauma. These people do not help themselves because they do not know how. They have low self worth and self sabatoge. The sob story is often trauma dumping which is an unhealthy coping mechanism. You must be able to decipher covert narcissism from someone with other types of problems. Also, most people do not take on people as projects, because that type of person is probably people pleasing or looking for validation. The best way to avoid getting sucked in is to offer help in small doses, encourage and then pull back. Reward when they level up and stick to your boundaries. A narcissist will suck you dry but someone who needs help and support will benefit from it.

artboxfashion
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There is a difference between 1) helping someone who truly needs help in the moment and 2) taking on a “project” to transform someone else’s life or attitudes for them. We cannot change others; they have to want to change and put forth the effort to change themselves, to find better ways of coping and living. “Fixers” need to stop trying to fix others, and instead focus on fixing their own boundaries and seriously slow down in bonding with anyone who they feel drawn to fix.

saa
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This is SO validating! They act humble, and like they are so altruistic. But the truth only becomes clear later...after so much manipulation. And it doesn't stop. Even at the end. They still see themselves as the "good" one...and no matter how badly you were treated...its still turned into.."I did so much for you!".
Covert narcissists are just so emotionally damaging.
Thank you, Dr. Ramini!

randomsasquatchwithwifi
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I grew up in a family of vulnerable narcissists, and I did a lot of therapy to get past it. These videos are so helpful because they show me where I've still got traces of narcissism to work through. It's hard to look back through my life and realize that even though I thought I was fine, I was still carrying on the family tradition with a victim mentality and being really self-absorbed. But I'm determined to get every last speck of these traits out of me. Being healthy enough to face the truth makes a big difference.

aliciahall
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' Being someone who feels like always helping and ' fixing ' people's problems to help them - can encourage a vunerable narcissist ' - WOW . Absolutely true

alanalycan
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I’m divorcing a vulnerable narcissist. They are always the victim and nothing is ever their fault. During arguments she would use everything you’ve shared as a weapon, but the minute you mention theirs they play the victim to make you feel bad and say this is why they never open up to people. Whatever she fails to get done becomes my fault because I didn’t help her get them done. Also when they want their way or want to get out of something then they will become emotional and cry as a way to manipulate to get what they wanted. They hold you to a standard as a partner that they can never give you in return. Lastly, they take control over the argument to express their emotions and you never get a turn to express yours. You’re left being upset while they’re already behaving like everything is okay again.

mellow
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My vulnerable narcissist ex told me “you’re incapable of love because you were never loved as a child” weaponising my childhood experiences against me to explain why I, in their view, was “incapable of loving them”, basically because I wouldn’t take their s*** anymore

AppetiteRose
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The love bombing I received looked like this:
-poor Eeyore, he’s so sad and mopey
-a lot of future faking. We’d talk about vacations we wanted to take, the house we wanted to build… when xyz happened (which it never did)
-his roommate sucked, his parents sucked, there was always that supervisor that didn’t recognize his expertise, and they sucked too
-everyone he’d been with had cheated on him, he decided to trust me anyway and take a leap of faith

lindseydantzler
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I briefly dated a vulnerable narcissist. Luckily, I saw the red flags early on. What initially seemed like deep, intimate sharing quickly transformed into me having to listen to endless sad stories from his past. I caught on to this, along with his passive aggressive behavior. When I confronted him about it, he became defensive and started blaming me. He even said that his trust in me was betrayed! I believe your work helped me see these toxic patterns quickly, so I removed this person from my life. Many thanks! Gratitude and appreciation!

lisaasteriou