You Don't Find Happiness, You Create It | Katarina Blom | TEDxGöteborg

Why is it so hard to find that life of meaning, and connection, and happiness we long for? Why can't we just live in our "happy place" all the time?
According to psychologist Katarina Blom, the brain is not always on your side when it comes to well-being. Survival, absolutely. The rest, not so much. But there is hope!

[bluesssss]

To anyone who searched this video up hoping to be happier with the life you're currently living I wish you the best days of your life after watching this.
Smile and be rest assured that the happiness that you've been looking for has always been within you and it will take time to master the habit of truly being satisfied with where you are in life.
You watching this video already proves you're willing to try to be better and that alone deserves an applause. I'm proud of you❤

[royahashimi]

who has come here to boost their English like me?

[onceuponatime.podcast]

TED Talks is a great place for people learning English, for listening skill. Thanks

[tutu]

2:20 it's not just about positive thinking
4:20 we have a better chance at controlling our actions
6:44 diary study: negative effect of a setback was more than twice as strong as the positive effect of a success
8:00 negativity bias
9:20 happiness is a skill that we all can work on
10:58 exercise: [send] appreciative gratitude text to someone that you care for
12:24 harvard study: happiness doesn't come from wealth, fame or working hard [but] relationships

[PiyushKumar-lgis]

Had me in tears towards the end.
For whoever needs to hear this, just hang in there, this too shall pass

[alegna]

"your brain is concerned that you survive throughout this day, it's less concerned that you're a happy survivor".

[marksheraton]

It is the people in these Ted Talks videos that have got me through the past 5 years. I do not have anyone in my life to sit and share who i am with, but i know if i was to talk to these people they would understand. That is good enough for me . xx

[josepablobolanos]

I'm a Psychologist, too. And, of all the talks on happiness I've listened to, this is probably the best one yet. At least for my high school students.

[naiematussakinah]

I learn to improve my English while watching ted talk. And. After one year, im able to speak fluently in english, i guess if i retake my muet exam, i could possibly get band 4.
That's what i called systematic 😎

[miltonjunior]

Two things: first, happiness is inner, is not a destination, but how you walk along the way. Second, replacing bad habits with good ones takes time and discipline and focus on only one at a time. And don’t forget to celebrate all the tiny achievements.

[caroltian]

It’s better to control our action, rather than our thoughts. The quality of relationship matters more. Really amazing speech! To create happiness from now on. Let’s begin!

[nenginggrifitriya]

Wow amazing speech!👏🏻 I think this video is so suitable for young people in their 20s, including myself, who are in the early stages of quarter life crisis. In this phase we begin to question what goals and achievements we should get in our life. One of them is happiness. We wonder "where can I find happiness?", "how to find happiness?". It's all about "finding happiness". Whereas happiness is a skill that we all can work on. I’ve heard many people say that "happiness is created from ourselves, not be sought", I never believed that sentence until I finally did it myself. We should control our action not just about our positive thinking to create happiness, because if we only worrying our thought about how to be happy, it won't change anything. Let’s start an action to creating happiness by ourselves for a better life.

[Erickaosoad]

She is amazing! She speaks so peacefully and helpful! I would love spend a lot of time talking to her! Great TedTalks!

[yannieleung]

Happiness is a skill that we all can train and work on. I was afraid of uncertainty even I knew that the situation would not be improved nevertheless I kept on worrying. After watching this powerful speech, I learnt that happiness can be created because it comes within. It is true that positive thinking bring us a better life. Therefore, all of us should cultivate happiness by befriending our brain.

[nimishapal]

she brings a lot of positivity in her talk and how beautifully and calmly connected as evident in the second time exercise of clapping..it makes us realise how even in such short interval we could connect and make people believe in you...

[aqibzafar]

One of the way how get happiness is talk like this lady, speaking peacefully. It creates softness in listening too.

[victoriapalmer]

I try to nurture my friendships. I try to let my friends know how grateful I am for them. But the sad thing about recent years it's not a given take I never hear anything nice in return nobody is putting the effort in anymore to building and keeping friendships. I believe that is a big key to happiness is friendships.

[oiybmmh]

When we succeed, we must not forget our past.
When we fail, we must remember
there is still tomorrow.
When the path leads to nowhere,
we can always take another path.
We can make a diversion.

[Yootekholdings]

TRANSCRIPT:
Hello, everyone.
I would like us to begin with a short exercise.
So can everybody place their hands like this? Reach out your hands. Thank you and I will count to three.
And when I say three, I want you to clap your hands, OK? 1…2…3…
So, I did this to show you that we don’t always do, as other people tell us to do. We rather do as other people do. And this is important when it comes to creating wellbeing in ourselves and in others.
I’m a psychologist, and I train organizations, teams and individuals in creating happiness and well-being. And a couple of years back, I co-authored a book on the Science of Happiness.
But when the book was published, I was actually in the middle of a life-crisis. I’d just broken up with the person who I thought I’d spend my life with. I had no place to live, and no job.
And I think this is a very common human experience. We all face problems. We end up in crisis, sometimes, and we struggle.
But at the same time, I think most of us we long for that other the kind of life that entails meaning and connection and happiness. But it’s kind of difficult to live this life to always be there in this happy place.
And today, I want to show you why your brain is not always on your side when it comes to creating happiness. But also, what we can do to counter this.
And it’s not going to be by just positive thinking. This takes positive action. Because happiness is a skill. We all can train and work on.
I want us to start here: how it’s not just about positive thinking?
So let’s begin with this. Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you’re really worried about something and you kept worrying even though you knew that worrying won’t change the situation or help the situation anyway? And nevertheless, you just kept on worrying. Hands up. Right? We’re all doing this.
And if we could have total mind power, and just switched over toward these happy thoughts, we’d just have done that and get on with our lives. But that doesn’t really happen. That’s it
And did you know that, about half of the time that you’ve been listening to this speech, your mind has probably been wandering off thinking about other things?
According to a study by Daniel Gilbert and Matthew Killingsworth: our minds wander 46.9% of the time we spend awake. So our thoughts are automatic, they have a life of their own. And to create happiness by just controlled positive thinking. I think it’s hard, if not even possible, impossible.

[irisreteach]

Thanks to her I know I'm happy though I'm single, unemployed for almost one year. Because I have family, friends always ready to back me up. Thank you so much.