Being Lonely in Your 30s

Sharing my experiences with loneliness as a man in my 30s.

For the algorithm - mensmentalhealth, self improvement, stoicism, spirituality, connection, relationships

[JayWallace]

Been truly humbled by the sheer amount of people going through the same struggle.

One thing is clear - we're not alone.

Thank you.

[MTSpade]

I'm 34 and havent had friends or a gf since high school. I act ok to most ppl but the truth is I just wanna tell them I'm lonely af

[sl]

I'm 38 and have never felt lonelier in my life, but at the same time I'm more okay with being alone than I've been before. I've realized that I'd rather be alone than being with people who judge me and make me feel like I need to be somebody else.

[HobbyAsylum]

We live in a time of immense loneliness.

[Agadendro]

It can all change in the blink of an eye, remember that. At 32 I had no one, now 6 years later I have a wife and kid. Never been more happy.

[tituscrow]

I’m 50 - I’ve learned this. - it doesn’t matter what you have. If you don’t have anyone to share it with. You don’t have anything. It’s a hard fact. & materialism wants us all lonely and also adversarial.

[blaket]

I actually didn't mind being lonely in my 30's. I felt like I still had time. Now I'm lonely in my 40's and it's an entirely different feeling. I'm 42, no wife and no friends and trust me it is way worse than the same in your 30's. When I was in my 30's I still had hope. Once you hit your 40's that's just about gone.

[oGorgopodaros]

This man has balls of steel for sharing his thoughts in public.

[frn]

It's such a sad thing that in today's world, we are the most connected yet we're lonelier than ever.

[bjorncleven]

I'm 36 years old and have 0 friends. This video is the best I've seen in years. Take care.

[izilfe]

Bro.. the fact that you were able to make this video and talk about this topic in a public setting PROVES that you are a brave person.

[johnlopez]

35 here. Over the years, I've been embracing my loneliness more and more. I see right now as my 'Golden Era' to master myself! It's my time with no distractions to get back on track financially, physically, romantically etc. I've begun to learn to love myself again on this solo path. But most importantly. I am learning to 'just be'. It's peaceful. If you're reading this, please know that things get better...remember this: if you can conquer your mind, you can conquer the world!

[marcelinolorenzo]

I am 28...introvert, no friends, never had a girlfriend, no talents, no looks, no job, had a terrible high school and college, addiction, not sure about the future, so many Just praying my Rosary everyday and going to church ... has given me hope and reduced my loneliness... 🙂

[michaelcosta]

Social anxiety is real.
I suffer from it for years now. It is BAD.
I’m 34, soon to be 35, and I don’t know what to do.
I hear ya, bud. This video spoke directly at me. Thank you

[wargo]

I was lonely for many many years in my life. Didn’t have a girlfriend since highschool. I was oddly content being lonely most of the time and had a sense of comfort in it. I was jealous of a lot of my friends who were married and living different lives than I was. Many of them are now divorced and went through very tough situations. The best advice I can give anyone who is lonely is to not force yourself out of it. Don’t settle for the first thing that comes your way to make you not lonely. A bad relationship is worse than no relationship. And being lonely is ok. And if you are lonely, you’re not alone, because there are many many people out there who are experiencing the same feeling. And there are many people out there who don’t know how to be alone and that is a big weakness in my opinion. The less dependent you are on other people for your own happiness, the stronger you’ll be. I ended up meeting someone after 10 years being alone and now I look back on those years and I’m thankful for every minute. Just never lose hope, and don’t ever get down on yourself. Things will happen naturally if you just keep doing you.

[kriseightyfive]

This is one of the realest videos I've seen in a while. I don't know how it ended up in my feed, but here we are.
Personally I've been trough it all, to the point I'm now almost 40 divorced and single. Over the years I've lost everyone and everything; family, friends, wife, kids, and even homeless for about 3 years. I've managed to bounce back being more than financially stable and physically and mentally fit. But I'm still lonely.
I'm often described as the "I wish I had someone like you" guy, but if I where to drop on the ground right now, I wouldn't be found until the house starts to smell. I've reached all my goals, but even then there's no one there. And at this point I don't even know where to go or what to do.
All I know is, we are not made to be alone.

[Peter_Holder]

I'm 32, pushed a lot of my social circle away in my 20s. Everyone seemed to have figured out their career, were moving out, coupling up etc and I had no idea what to do with my life. It felt like I was being left behind and also lacked any purpose in life. It was a miserable place to be and I didn't know how to express/talk about it. So I withdrew into myself and hyper focused on financial/career success. I've felt loneliness for a long time, but masked it as being self-reliant. There is definitely value to being comfortable with being alone, and I've learned a lot as a result. However, I don't want to live my whole life this way. I recognise that I do want friendships and romantic relationships, and I believe it's possible for me.

Thank you for posting this, I imagine it took a lot of courage.

[awakenthegreatnesswithin]

“Perfection is the enemy of progress.” We get stuck where we are because we want everything to be perfect before we take action

[cola]

You are not alone. I feel the exact same as you and I am in my mid 30s. I have thought about doing a video but I don't have courage due to social anxiety. I commend you for your courage in making this video.

[devilsadvocacy]

Figuring out one’s life has no timeline. Set goals, and when you reach them, set more. Life is a journey, not a destination