My Wife’s Anxiety Is Ruining Our Lives

My Wife’s Anxiety Is Ruining Our Lives

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[mmmmlllljohn]

This phone call probably saved his kids a lifetime of being people pleasers and thinking there was something wrong with them. Kudos to this dad!

[jungdoc]

I work as a resident psychiatrist. One of my attending physician’s, who herself struggled with anxiety, mentioned something very powerful about anxiety that I’ll never forget: “anxiety just makes you mean”.

[janicewright]

I would lash out. My hubby made me see a doctor. My hormones were whacked out! Got treated and our home was much calmer

[GrandmaLivesInTheBasement]

So many women unknowingly have hormone issues. Most doctors do not recognize and treat hormone issues in women. Our medical system is failing women!!! I know this because I have lived it and had to figure this out for myself. Most women are diagnosed with anxiety, depression, ADHD etc… when in actuality all they have is a hormone imbalance due to menopause / early menopause. Simple Hormone Replacement Therapy can completely change a woman’s life for the better. I found a great women’s clinic that specializes in balancing women’s hormones and it changed everything. Before I figured out my physical and emotional symptoms were due to low estrogen due to menopause…I went to many doctors and none of them even mentioned this as a possible cause. I will say it again..our medical system is failing women! Spread the word to the women in your lives!

[andrewbrendan]

I can hear the brokenness in the caller's voice. He is oppressed, ground-down and exhausted.

[Myr]

This sounds like my now deceased mother. She would fly into outrageous rages, screaming and cussing at us for things we had done 5 yrs previously. All because she got mad at someone else. She would later say “I don’t know why I act like that”. But after a while we stopped listening to the apology because we knew it would just happen again. We begged her to get help but she always refused. She destroyed all the love I ever had for her. In fact, that loving relationship never developed. As an adult I honored my mother, took her out every week to lunch, and helped her when she developed dementia. But when she died, in a way, I was relieved. I no longer had to put up with her abuse. Right up until the week before she passed she was still telling me what a horrible person I was as I was wheeling her out to lunch, buying her whatever she wanted at the store. It never stopped. For those poor kid’s sake, he needs to take them and leave.

[allanblack]

My dad used to say, "I can't make you mad, you are choosing to be mad." And that always made me more mad because it's not true. But he was right in the sense that people can make you mad, but no one can make you act on that anger.

[CrystalM]

Just listening from the start of the call he sounds absolutely exhausted and defeated. Thats what living with anxiety is like and I imagine what living with someone who has it is also like.

[TheDreamCrosser]

My Dad was the one to take us to take us for ice cream and airplane watching when ever Mom would fly off the handle. Doctor never could find a answer for her behavior, so this happened all of her life, and unfortunately that meant a lot of ice cream and airplane days. I am happy he did what he could and helped me get other “moms” from church to help us out with the girl things and whenever he would need to leave on business trips he would drop us off at those families and we would have a great time.

It was broken, but a I so beyond thankful for my dad. These kids will see you as your super hero. Please Raymond. Be their hero.

[d.zynedthrive]

When I adequately exercise I feel like a completely different person. Seriously, it's like I wake up the scared inner child who grew up with an alcoholic, neglectful, abusive mother, and change into the me who died when my father died and my mom started the drinking, the me I was supposed to be. It takes an hour of almost daily moderate to strenuous exercise, but my mind is clear...the depression and anxiety are gone, the irritability and anger, all gone. Eating healthy and time in nature certainly help as well. As a homeschool mom of 5, being in my right mind is obviously extremely important. I wish I had been more consistent through the years. I have a lot of regrets. My mother passing away also helped, sad to say.

[wisdom_seeker]

I’ve dealt with anxiety for a good majority of my life but it was manageable. Last year my 19yr stepdaughter had last minute brain surgery and diagnosed with stage 4 brain cancer. I’ve been a caregiver to her and my four other kids, and the stress has elevated my anxiety and i battle with depression now. After one day i explode in front of my kids and after that I said “I need help bc my family do not deserve this!” I’m in therapy and now I’m taking meds for my anxiety and depression. Best decision ever!!! And with the guidance of my Lord Jesus my family is mending..We are human and we all struggle with different things and we can all use some help time to time.

[kalapariplayer]

I really appreciate this episode. My Mom had an undiagnosed bipolar disorder, and my Dad always justified her, blaming everyone else for making her angry or doing anything that would make her tick (which was everything pretty much). She used to beat me and emotionally abuse me when my Dad wasn't home, until she died of cancer. He never stood up for us or seeked help for my Mom. I've forgiven both of them after a lot of hard work in therapy. Dads need to have these conversations, they need to take control when Mom is not up to it. And I'm glad he's doing what I wish my Dad would have done when I was little.

[jyfulblessings]

As someone who had a passive, excuse making, stand-by parent who didn't stand up and protect me as a child; it was really nice to hear delony's advice on this one. It took me until 27 to realize my "nice", "good" parent was actually an enabler and when I brought this up it was met with "well what did you want me to do?!" After 10+ years there is no regret, no reflection, nothing. It was very hurtful. Especially as a mother myself now to older kids. I would never treat my kids how I was treated. Have never. And I would never stand by and watch and not do something to protect my kids if my spouse was. It's disgusting.

[texasdazzlers]

My dad’s crippling anxiety ruled our household growing up, and it got really bad during our most formative years. Instead of leaving him and breaking up the family, my mom decided to just keep us away from him as much as possible. She enrolled us in every possible after school activity that she could afford, drove us all one creation to have meetups with friends, etc. so we didn’t have to be at home much. For awhile, I resented her for alienating us from our dad. Now, seeing things through an adult lens, I can see she was trying desperately to protect us. One time she told me “I just couldn’t let you kids think his behavior was your fault!” We would have. Children internalize everything.

[rodneyperry]

My angry wife would try to get me angry so she felt better about her anger. I stopped getting angry and it enraged her.

[neisci]

Parents that watch their children being abused by the other parent or any one else are complicit in the abuse. He needs to take those children and run. To every parent out there: Protect your children.

[robsgirl]

This is the message/ talk that i needed when i was a new mom.
In the early years, i struggled to keep my cool. I would lose it and then cy because i was becoming my mother, and i wanted better for my kids. About 7 years ago, after a really bad explosion, I finally resolved to make a change. I asked my husband to keep me accountable and never cover for my bad behavior with the kids. I actively sought out podcasts, videos, and books to help me.
It breakes my heart that my older 2 kids had a completely different mom than the younger 2 got.

[ireefree]

She needs therapy and if she refused it again than he needs to leave. This is so messed up and her kids will follow her path. Someone needs to protect these children 😢

p.S. some people shouldn't have children. My childhood was also messed up in some ways because of trauma / alcoholism of my parents. And only therapy helped me. I have no kids and I think I should pass on it because I'm still not balanced enough, maybe never be.

[chrislim]

My worst nightmare. To hate the mother of my children or have children with this kind of person. This guy sounds broken.

[marywiggins]

He should put up cameras, record the incidences, take himself to counseling, and take the kids to counseling too.
After getting this established, then he can leave with them if she doesn't follow medical advice.
The family model will become their experience as childhood trauma, and haunt them for decades unless they get to see another model, or another way to live. Kids deserve peace, they deserve adults behaving like adults that protect them.