it's time to LET GO of these type of 'FRIENDS'

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[funnytv-]

Bad friends often ruin your trust by sharing your personal information without your consent leading to strained relationships

[alexhutton]

We should never expect "perfect" friendships . Some of the best people struggle with friendship .

[kaigorodaki]

"Be the friend you wish to have" 💯

[roachbusters]

Almost all friendships I've had have been toxic. Real friends are an extreme rarity.

[Chan-cmdo]

In this age, you are really lucky if you can find even one friend that you can fully trust for the rest of your life. Time is so strange that you cannot trust anyone, this is not only for friends, but also for your siblings.

[ayeryhoy...]

It was hard to say goodbye to a friendship of over 20 years. I constantly wondered what I had done wrong. However, in the end, I realized that person wasn't truly my friend but someone who was causing me trouble. It's strange to know that an enemy is never the one who betrays you, but actually someone you considered a brother was the real enemy

[PerfectSense]

I have to disagree about the part about seeking friends who will make a point of criticizing you if you aren't "growing" enough to their standards. It's good to have friends who will tell you the truth if you ask. But I'm already fully aware of my own progress, I don't need someone needling me and giving unsolicited advice about how far along I'm on something according to how they perceive it.

[asdax]

Having too many friends is overatted. They don't develop social skills as highly as you think. Just making acquaintances is more than enough to get through life.

[asmrhistory]

I recently just distanced myself from a person I considered my friend for 24 years. I can not be with someone who constantly makes excuses for his degenerate behaviour. People need to realize that sometimes its better to be alone then to have so called "Friends".

[Amantducafe]

Careful because you can end up surrounded by perfectionist friends that will belittle you or use you as a measuring stick to feel better about themselves.

[UsurpersAndAssassins]

I'm glad you are realizing this much younger than I did. "Friends" are often just losers trying to keep you down to make themselves feel better about their lack of effort in life. Find better people. You can have fun with anyone, so it's better to do it with people who encourage you.

[FrFlamee]

"Be the friend you wish to have" truely the best thing ive ever been told.

[MrFiremagnet]

This thing is a double edged sword. Sometimes you get into a real ambitious group, and than you find yourself persuing things you care about in a context of that group, but that might not be really good for you in a long term. For example, everyone is working while studying - and you start to feel obligated to find a job even if you struggle with academia while they don't struggle or struggle but don't care about it. Well, if you don't have your own established goals and established boundaries you can easily become a follower and your following may diminish your progress in life.
So I would say a soft "no" to the fact that friends should be always challenging and that you must challenge other. Friends should be a support system, based on mutual respect and acceptance. Challenging yourself is your own job, not theirs.

[Fea.]

From my experience loyalty is the most important pillar for a strong friendship, cause you can be friends with anyone but without consistency, the relationship will fade away quickly because some if not most of those friendships are built around a benefit whether it's mutual or personnal benefit. To summarize all this we should love our friends as human beings and not as beneficial machines.

[Vikoboi]

Toxic friends will ruin your life and good friends will help you stay sane in your vulnerable times, above all the most important thing for me is to be your own best friend because no matter how good friends you might have there will be times when they don't have time for you and prioritize other things. Love and protect yourself before committing to others. Don't let other people be the only source to your happiness, being able to be emotionally independent is good! And do you best to have people that love and accept you for who you are! Have a good day everyone! Much love to you all!

[jcdeton]

I think I was the toxic part of my friendships. I had 8 friends and now I have 0 and Im alone. 2 I abandoned, 2 abandoned me, 1 died, 2 got married and left town and 1 started a career as a lawyer and went to study who knows where. Everyone had my number but nobody ever called me even once the moment we all graduated and life started. But I guess you could say that I also didnt call them so that doesnt mean much, I just suck at socializing and I accepted that its better for me to stay alone until I die.

[Marika_ER]

Screw the financial stuff. Friends are there to have fun and to talk to. I love my friends. If im broke, that's on me, not my friends

[lagomholly]

I do believe people come into our lives to fill a particular role at a given time. But when that role is no longer required and their purpose fulfilled they will then leave or something will happen for them to be no longer a part of our lives. This has been my experience with friends over the course of my life and I believe although it can be hard to let go initially, the signs are there when the relationship turns sour and they’re no longer a positive impact on your life. Just know some friendships don’t have to last forever and nor should they. Make room for the right people to come into your life and I can promise you’ll feel so much happier for it!☺️

[AnjekD]

While I do agree that toxic friendships can ruin your life, I think we should not be so eager do disqualify someone based on some "red flags". Remember, everyone is struggling as you do, and sometimes a good friend is just going trough a lot.

This tends to happen more frequently in underdeveloped countries where everyone's life is difficult, so if you live in such environments, you defenitely should consider lowering the bar a little. Life is not a competition and helping others is a sign that you are doing well to the point you can afford to.

[yonzonnn]

I've now realized that I was a part of so called 'toxic friendship' with my bff since childhood. Fat shaming is often considered severe and people talk about it and encourage it but only less people think that skinny shaming is as equally toxic as fat shaming, my friends always used to skinny shame me, first I took it lightly but as I slowly grew up, it has become my insecurity, I'm quite tall in fact I was the tallest in my friend group and my so called bffs used to point that out making me feel insecure. Not long ago I posted a picture of myself on whatsapp status and my so called bff were quick enough to point out by saying 'you look like a bamboo' 'you look like you're about to break'. But im thankful that im quite far from them now as im doing my uni in another city. Toxic friendship is really scary.
Thank you Ruri for bringing this topic and talking about it.