Why NO CONTACT Makes Your Ex Come Back & 3 Key Steps

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Ever wonder why that old saying "absence makes the heart grow fonder" holds true in so many people's experiences? In today's video, Thais Gibson shares the ins and outs of the "no contact" rule and why it works.
Watch now to find out what the no contact rule is, as well as an exercise you can do to help you meet your needs, as Thais provides useful tips and guidance.
To learn more, explore the transformative course, "How to Heal From a Break Up & Transform Grief", for powerful tools you can begin using immediately on your journey!

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00:00:00 - Intro
00:01:34 - What Is No Contact
00:02:23 - What is included in No Contact
00:03:21 - Why does no contact work and what’s the purpose?
00:04:21 - How long should we stay in no contact?
00:05:39 - Using no contact to the best of our ability
00:06:45 - IAT Promo: Sign Up Now!
00:07:40 - How do we heal those actual voids that the ex left behind?
00:10:33 - Meeting your needs
00:11:09 - What to do
00:14:41 - Conclusion

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Hey there! I'm Thais Gibson, and this is the channel where I teach you how to transform your life.

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Our Youtube videos give you a glimpse into this in-depth course content. Much of what you'll learn here is based on your attachment style and how that affects the relationships you have with your family, friendships, and of course, your romantic relationships.

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#PersonalDevelopmentSchool #ThaisGibson #PDS #AttachmentStyles #NoContact #WhatIsNoContact #NoContactAfterBreakup #UnmetNeeds #BreakupCourse

[ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool]

Have you ever used no contact after a break up before? What was your experience like? ❤

[LuisBarroeta]

Give the gift of NO contact for those individuals who didn’t want to make the relationship work and expected things to just BE instead of realizing their attachment trauma was the reason relationship didn’t work

[gokuwufei]

No contact is such a strange phenomenon Thais. I've been watching you since New Years and was CRAZY hurting and obsessing, she was on my mind 24/7 and my DA ex actually still shows up after our break up 2 years ago. We both stayed single and hung out until she exploded and ditched me on New Years. I put in the work. Upgraded heavily, and now after just spurts of no contact unless she reached out to see me....I really don't think I want her anymore. I took her off that pedestal and realized she's not capable of loving me like I deserve. I can't pour from an empty cup. She's so creative, BEAUTIFUL, funny, and smart....but me growing more secure made me realize the truth. She's just a friend I once had a wonderful 3 year relationship with...thats all. Nothing more, she's not the one 🤷

[tumbleweedconnection]

No contact with an ex should be forever. Until or unless they reach out to you. If you break no contact you will set yourself back in your healing journey.

[danilaroche]

3 exes came back after lengthy NC. The thing is they never grew.. They were all tortured, depressed and in bondage. My belief is the Lord knows whose my best partner. Im glad your branching out! Your so pretty! God bless and keep you.

[emey]

As former ap no contact is like slowly but once we die we find true peace🤷🏼‍♀️

[melly]

Mine left and never came back…it’s been 1 yr and 3 months now. I did no contact for 3 months then reached out and that did nothing for me. Struggling getting passed being discarded like a one night stand but it is what it is. I have to move forward. We were together for a year.

[forthebigwin]

Thank you for stressing the importance and no-compromising approach of no contact. You're absolutely right that people tend to look for excuses or nuanced definitions to help cope with the issue, but like you said no contact means absolutely NO contact. Not enough coaches/creators in this space highlight just how important this is.

[HopeFaithExpect]

Been strict no contact with ex wife for last 12 yrs (together 8yrs) and strict no contact for 9mos now with ex fiancee (together 9yrs). Not a peep out me or them to me. Neither came back. They gave zero F's. No Contact doesnt work to get em back. Its complete bs if you think it will cause a person want to get back with you. It works to make you a better person & stronger.

[OneWhoKnowz]

I didn’t get back with any of my exes…I been no contact for a year and a half. It’s been the best time of my life. I healed so much of the trauma I carried around.

[bevanavard]

You are a the breath of fresh air I needed thankyou.

[shaynesimmonstattoo]

Did no contact with my recent ex, she came back, we agreed to a shared set of values and boundaries for her to get another chance, 2 months later she violated those boundaries and *half *agreed to fix it but didn’t actually *do* the fixing… so I don’t ever plan on taking her back.

I remember someone saying that a person should get one chance per lifetime. She got her do-over and fumbled it. She’d have to put in the work with enough consistent therapy to basically show up as an entirely different person.

[thebirima]

No contact when u still live together in one house with three kids is impossible. Therefore I limit the contact to what is necessary to keep the household running. In all other aspects I show no initiative and don’t show emotions. I do however answer politely when spoken to me. If it were possible to move to another place I would.

[nickblackman]

No contact is forever don’t waste your time - however always be the better person and end it on a good note- and wish them all the best in their life. You have a life now go live it!

[Calicokitty]

Thanks for such a helpful video. But, while I can see how examining and meeting my needs is so helpful, it somehow seems so technical in the midst of my own hurting.

[caitlingregory]

That’s fantastic. I need to check these classes out. Thank you!

[donovanlemos]

Well I've done it twice.

Currently doing the 3rd, I don't know if it will work this time. She is an avoidant of sorts, not sure which one really.

First 2 worked well, 3 weeks the first time, and 9 weeks second.

She reached out with a classic "Are you alive?" After 3 weeks, spoke to me for 3 days and now has vanished again. Had to unfortunately speak today to arrange collecting some stuff that I do need and something else I can't avoid, and she said she thinks it's best for both of us to split.

So I'm confused, seemed she was coming back when she messaged the other day. But not so sure now...

I am hurting. NC is hard enough, but when you get false hope, it's amplified 😢

[ColorMeMaria]

I understand the concept of working on ourselves through this time. Getting them back by doing this seems like a false hope however, when you can assume that they may be doing this as well. So if we both do no contact and we both only communicate if the other one comes back then it’s like we’ll never get back together..

[QueenDeeTV]

This video made me realize my ex DA technically broke no contact after I walked away, after only three weeks, which I think is unusual. Started liking my pictures and watching my story on Instagram. Here’s the twist though, he didn’t even do that during the 9 months when we were together ! So confusing.

[delbertfrench]

Do you always wait for them to contact you or reach out when you have healed. Also what do you do if you see them in public at a sporting event?