The 7 Ways We Attract a Narcissist

The 7 ways we attract a narcissist into our life. Having this information leads us to healing and making sure we never fall prey again.

The 7 Ways We Attract A Narcissist
15:30 1. We knew from the beginning, we saw red flags and ignored them
16:05 2. We think we can fix them
17:13 3. We have an obsession with figuring them out
17:57 4. We do everything we can to control their behavior and get them to stop
18:40 5. We try to become whatever the narcissist wants
21:25 6. We keep going back, we "give ourselves away" yet we blame the narcissist
25:20 7. We can’t take ownership, we are always the victim, we can’t see our part

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Hi, I'm Kenny and I created this channel for you!

It has been my experience that the media, society, and our parents often teach us to avoid admitting, facing, or talking about any of our negative feelings and experiences.

This belief system cripples us. As a result, we are without the basic skills to navigate the simplest of life's ups and downs.

Even worse, it creates a separation from our authentic self because we learn the world will shame us for our slightest imperfection.

My life turned around when I realized that the answer is in the opposite.

I discovered that the solution to an authentic life lies in our ability to admit, accept, and love our perfect imperfections.

That can only happen when we heal the pain from the past that created the shame by becoming trauma informed.

Because when we make peace with even the darkest parts of ourselves, we are capable of loving ALL of ourselves. Therefore we are authentic.

Without it, we are stuck in purgatory. Instead, we are reliving the original pain and shame in our relationships, career, health, and hobbies.

Therefore, the secret to avoiding a life stuck in limbo is developing emotional mastery.

When we gain that knowledge, develop it into a skill that becomes a tool, we stop picking toxic relationships.

We don't settle for unsatisfying careers. We don't struggle with depression or health issues. We stop the self-sabotage!

In short, we develop a deep emotional calm, peace, personal love, trust, and respect for ourselves that we can now share with others.

If that is what you want, you are in the right place.

I am excited to be a part of YOUR journey in helping you to heal the pain from your past, love your perfect imperfections, and reclaim your authentic self by developing Emotional Mastery!

#Kenny Weiss #Kenny Weiss narcissist #Why do I keep attracting narcissists

[womanatthewell]

Thank you! I’ve been to two counselors and neither dealt with my codependency. It was a venting session about what the narcissist husband was doing with no solutions or real practical empowerment. This video helps me a lot to look at myself. I have to learn to be my own advocate and put up healthy boundaries. Jesus, please deliver me from codependency and empower me to be the woman of God you created me to be. Amen.

[carolynknott]

I am honestly grateful for the narcissist I married. Fortunately, I did not love him. The abuse that I tolerated forced me to seek mental health support. Finally, at the age of 56 I am no longer a codependent nor a people pleaser. I am happy and now pursuing my purpose.

[johnpre]

Spot on and heartbreaking. I damn near broke down hearing this. You are 100 percent correct about taking responsibility for our part in the process.

[tammystours]

Love this! I have been saying this since my early 20s.. I KNEW the problem wasn’t that men are bad.. I KNEW, there are good guys out there, but I just choose the abusers.. in fact I went to a support group for women suffering abuse, I would bring this up, our responsibility in it.. no one wanted to hear it! I have been well aware of my own brokenness and being the scapegoat in a narcissistic family.. my problem is, it seems no matter how much responsibility I take or how much work I do, these STILL seem to be the people who keep coming across my path.. the difference now is I recognize it immediately, and steer clear of it.. but I am very alone, I do not have any family that I trust, my relationship with them is very superficial as I cannot be vulnerable with them because of their predatory nature, and lack of emotional healthiness..
I’m now 54 and have been single for the last 7 years, I haven’t even dated.. I can tell many of my wounds have in fact been healed, but I do believe I still have CPTSD from the massive amount of abuse in my life. I get hopeful because I do in fact see my growth, but then the next person who shows interest in me will always be someone w high narcissistic traits whether it’s a female friend or a man who is pursuing me. It is frustrating.. I have done SOOOO much work and seen councilors, have become very good at being there for myself and content w solitude but I still have a longing for healthy friendships and possibly a spouse one day.. it is sooo frustrating that I am so aware and have healed so much, but this pattern continues to try to keep repeating itself.. I read the book Women who Love Too Much in my early 20s and I said, yep! That’s me!
I do in fact feel like I’ve come a long way in my healing journey.. now I’m just like: where are the healthy people?? Just one is all I need! I don’t know why I can’t break through this final stage of healing… if it wasn’t for my relationship with the Lord, and His presence in my life, I think I’d have given up long ago.
Thank you so much for your work! Many blessings!

[jacquelinearbuthnot]

Because of you Mr. Weiss, I discovered today that not only have I been loving a narcissist but I'm a narcissist too. We both have childhood trauma and this is why we attracted each other. God through you, answered my prayer of what I've been seeking. Finally I know at 66 years old that its time to keep seeking help because I want to heal. Jacqueline

[HolisticManifesting]

This is groundbreaking. This is why I don't listen to Dr. Romani as much, I always feel like victim. This makes me feel empowered. This is why I always feel like I'm a narcissist too, because parts of me are. Smh

[Amor-Fati.]

I will not pitty their trauma as a child. The depth of evil, I have to fight becoming vindictive like them.

[petroschoeman]

Wow! I grew up in alcoholic family and yet I married an alcoholic. This all makes so much sense. Thank you

[nancyblessing]

Thank you for addressing this. The co dependent has to ask themselves "what is it about me that attracts this kind of person?"

[AttackHak]

Codependents and narcissists are two sides of a coin. Not many people recognize that… under empowered narcissism that’s a perfect term. I am so glad you are bringing this all up. As soon as we learn to have power over ourselves and break our patterns life starts to get so much better!

[carolynknott]

I was offended when I first saw your videos a few weeks ago. I finally understand your message and I am very appreciative of you stepping in front and away from the crowd on this issue.

[SMA]

This is one of the best analysis of the narcissistic relationship. I’ve been on an in depth exploration into my own part of why I have attracted narcs to me. At one point I had a FB group on narcissistic recovery and no one wanted to own their stuff. All they wanted to do was tell their stories of the abuse they endured. I began to believe these groups were a perpetuation of the charge to the narc. So thank you for speaking truth. It is so valuable.

[Geronimou]

Traumatized people continue practicing the things that allowed them to survive during those times. By understanding and knowing such matters we can be more mindful and not absorb such issues. With love all things are possible but it takes self awareness.

[totorro]

Thank you for helping me tremendously in snapping out of the victim and hatred spiral that I found myself in after second a counter with narcissistic individual. Thank you Kenny, you are doing God's work here in healing and restoration of those individuals who are willing to change, do better and be better

[wonderingstar]

You are so spot on!! we must realize that we can`t fix the other...and yes it feels like you are been drained ...this personality will make you do all the wrong things just to please them.

[mariannewisenor]

Thank you. My husband of fifty four years was a low grade narcissist. He died six years ago as I became knowledgeable of what was happening and began studying. Thinking about an event where he showed one of his narc traits, I would introspect and my intuition made me feel my part in it. This happened couple of times, so again thank you, more understanding.

[patkruse]

Kenny. I’m divorcing a Narcissist after 40 years of marriage. Also my 2 grown children are also Narcissists. Thank you for enlightening me! Your story is truly helping me. God Bless you.

[SpeakerConsuela]

Interesting take! It makes sense to me! If the ex-narc had never develop a strange anger problem, I would still be attached and addicted to the affection.

[YGabi]

The saddest thing is that we forget the abuse and killing and how dangerous both can be!😢

[TKouklaki]

Many congrats to you again ! You’re really so enlightening to me . I’m also a psychologist and I had also to abandon the manipulative relation I had with my editor … no matter what - he was really so demanding, so cocky, playing the victim all the time and so unkind. A real trap for my self esteem. Thanks me, finally I really got rid of him and put an end to all his games …😒