Beyond Fight, Flight, Freeze and Fawn: The Subtle Responses People Can Have to Traumatic Events

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Many people recognize the 4 F's: Fight, Flight, Freeze, and Fawn, but there are many subtle responses that fall within these categories. Those with unhealed complex trauma often rely on at least one of these responses, but there are also more nuanced or intense variations of each that can emerge in different situations.

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💜 Please be aware of scammers impersonating Tim or the Tim Fletcher team! We do not provide any phone numbers in the comments and Tim does not chat privately with viewers. We will never ask you to join us on a messaging app. When in doubt, reach out to us via our website at timfletcher.ca. Stay safe and scam-aware. With Love, The Tim Fletcher Team.

TimFletcher
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I was sent to a childrens home aged 2. I was surrounded by people with whom i had to fawn. I also have 3 older brothers and so fawning was my life! When I left the home aged 6 I used to cry in the night time for no apparent reason. On the plus side I have developed an almost psychic level of empathy (post traumatic growth!) which I now use in my coaching work

rohnos
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Boy, this explains a lot of my relationship with my Father. Around age four my Mother gave me the job to entertain my father before dinner hoping to keep him from drinking too much. Later when things got worse I was never sure when all hell would break loose and I would end up getting hurt trying to protect my mother.

lauracapaldo
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I prayed for some help today and then I clicked on this which puts some awareness to what I have been feeling the last few days... Thank you, Tim!

CynthiaSchoenbauer
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Listening from Florida 🧜‍♀️🏝️🐬 while evacuated for the hurricane ☮️

caroleminke
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Freeze and fawn are the 2 I’m working hard at overcoming ….thank you ❣️

godzillamanstreb
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Listening from Spain.
Complex trauma is International.

Lyrielonwind
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This makes me so happy. Just knowing that there’s reasons for this behavior is motivating me because that means there’s solutions

merriem
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Love your content!!!! Only person I can listen to with real solutions. Thankyou

Lionessliving
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Hi Tim,
thank you for your thorough explanation. It helps me to understand my husbands behaviour much better. Iam listening to you from Germany. I once lived in Winnipeg and my husband is from Toronto. Thanks again for sharing your deep insight and knowledge. 🙋🏼‍♀️Sonja

SonjaWatson-xf
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Yes…all the above. One of my first remembered traumas, , was fainting from fear when my brother hid in the dark and grabbed me. I then began my journey of practicing the Four F’s. And which worked for me at that particular event.

Ruby-wise
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❤I am every thing you describe as complex trauma...without God..there would be No way I could cope with this ..when I first heard you, I couldn't believe someone actually described Me..at 53yrs old, I've be 12..for too long...starting to grow up a bit 😅I'm probably 14 now ..strange but true..also I'm a mum & granny...I realise my daughters have this stuff two because* I was there mum...and that really sux...I hope this trauma can stop for our generations. Down the line ..bless you dr...
And thank you .🎉🎉

JodyRobertson-fk
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Oh my! Please and appease for so many years makes a person tired!!

Happylilsis
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I’m always curious if any connection has been found between babies who had to cry it out and their mental health today in their 30’s & 40’s. Seems like there was a resurgence in leaving babies to cry in the late 70’s through the 90’s to not only Ferberize babies, but extend the time left alone to teach “self-soothing” from anywhere from 6 weeks old to 3 years.

Seems like so much of the 4Fs would be established with those early experiences that no one comes when I cry.

amymefford
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Thank you so very much you are literally a God send! The Lord bless you for all the understanding and healing that comes from the wisdom you are sharing. May He continue to strengthen you and love you in so many ways!

indigo_dreamz
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Thank you Tim, this is an excellent presentation, an eye opener extra to my original understanding of the 4 Fs.

alison-ot
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He is so good that it makes me uncomfortable and has to pause every now and then😅

Jay-ixxp
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@tim fletcher Can freeze look like a child checking out? Not hearing you, not having opinions, not looking you in the eye?

suzannemartin
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The microphone/acoustics was not the best on this - the lower end sounds very "booming" making it harder to make sense.

Maganyos
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The opioids in freeze response… the BODY produces these opioids ?

heatherwallace