A Narcissist's Dirty Tactic Of Triangulation

Narcissists want to build themselves up at your expense, and they are willing to use dirty tricks to accomplish this goal. Dr Les Carter describes one of their favorite ploys, triangulation. Your task is to recognize this tactic and maintain your integrity so you won't be sullied by their games.

It also is available on Google, Apple, Spotify, and Amazon.

Sign up for Dr. Carter's course: Ready, Set, Connect
Get 20% off when you use the coupon code: rsc20youtube

Dr. Les Carter is a best selling author and therapist who has semi-retired to Waco, TX. For 40+ years he maintained a counseling practice in Dallas, conducting more than 65,000 therapy sessions and many workshops and seminars. He specializes in anger management and narcissistic personality disorder.

You can follow Surviving Narcissism on:
Twitter: @SNarcissism101
Instagram: @survivingnarcissism101
Facebook: @survivingnarcissism101

Dr. Carter has two other courses that you may find to be useful:

[chelleb]

Before I knew the word “triangulation” in regards to them, I instinctively knew that narcissists always need an ally and an enemy to function. I just didn’t understand why. Now I do. They don’t want peace, despite always claiming that’s what they want more than anything. The truth is, they want constant strife. They are warmongers who need allies and enemies to help them in their pursuit of eternal chaos. The carnage that ensues is what brings them the most pleasure in life. They will pit everyone against each other and somehow come out looking like both hero and victim at the same time. It’s actually quite impressive how they pull it off again and again and again and…

[theresathompson]

They are exhausting and irratating to deal with. It's best to get off their crazy train before they drive you crazy.

[susanwilson]

What is really sad is how many individuals fall for the lies even when they know you. Nefarious is certainly the word that describes this scenario.

[peacenquiet]

My mantra to protect my peace and guard my heart…
“I know the truth, and God knows the truth”

[druchampion-payne]

When triangulation turns others against you and you're shunned then this is "collective bullying" or "mobbing" .... I dealt with this type of bullying from my in-laws; specifically, my mother-in-law and 4 sisters-in-law. It's incredibly painful to be treated this way and damages your mental health. I'm currently working with a therapist who's helping me break free from this type of abuse.

[smustipher]

Triangulation is the preferred tool in my narc family system. It's sad to see people gossiping, slandering, and spreading false information instead of focusing on building healthy relationships!

[joltjolt]

When people talk about you to make others your enemy, they're narcissists.

[aaronkwolfe]

The duplicity used to gang up to win. Winning means everything to a narcissist.

[elisabethledez]

I was so shocked when I dicovered my narc mother was saying horrible things about me. Now I know this is called triangulation. Believe it or not, these individuals even tiangulate their own children.

[roxymovie]

Narcissists love to play -
the triangle.
Not as a musician.
But as a director.
Behind the scenes.
Composing drama - of the finest conart.

[laura.danisi]

RUN FROM THESE PEOPLE & DON’T LOOK BACK!

[lynnschaeferle-zhgo]

The Doctor here advises “rise above “. That’s the only way to go. Narcs love drama and chaos and it they aren’t getting what they want they are counting on a blow up for you to look like a jerk. Then they will pull their tricks while you are distracted

[CrazyEightyEights]

Few can poison wells like the malignant narcissist.

[lipstickprincess]

I was raised by a covert narcissist and pathological liar.
My mom and the rest of my “family” are emotionally dangerous.
My scars are deep.
I’ve cut them off for my own protection!!!

[BunnyLang]

This happens to the family scapegoat from an early age.

[monaj]

This is just what toxic siblings and parents do...in the name of God please rebuke all evil 😈 in families and heal all victims..Amen 🙏

[angelamwatts]

You know that you're a victim of triangulation when people who don't even know you look at you with contempt and stay distant from you. This is what my narcissist son did to me. My son was dating three women at once. I thought that he was serious about this one girl whom he was seeing exclusively until surprise, I was informed that he had gotten this other girl pregnant. So he broke it off with the one woman who was crushed and went with the other girl. The other one left him too. This pregnant girl and her family "loved" him but had this attitude about me that was cold and distant. I remember going to the baby shower and feeling like a fish out of water. Three years and two children later, she dumped him. I had very low contact with them. Long story short, the chaos, fighting, scapegoating, and drama ultimately led to me into going hard core no contact with my son and all associated with him including my grandchildren because the kids were used as a weapon to manipulate me into his "control." Any little infraction (real or imagined) turned into "you're not allowed to see your grandchildren anymore." I blocked all of them from my phone and social media.

I have tried every other solution and failed. I'm not going to take the blame for all of my son's problem. There's a boundary in place and whatever he does or says is none of my business. His victims can figure it out for themselves. You cannot warn potential victims because they won't believe you. They have to see it for themselves.

It's called life...

[elizabethf]

We have a narcissist who triangulates the entire group. It's soul-crushing.

[kdakuginow]

Triangulation is dangerously scary. Total strangers can do this to you and you are left wondering why. Then you realize; any nearby vulnerable person will fit their profile.

[paulaw]

OMG! I'm a lawyer, defending a person involved with child protective services. . .What you just explained is how they were completely buffaloed by the narcissist's triangulation! He won custody.