Is Male Privilege a Myth?

I made an entirely separate video refuting every one of this guy’s points, but I was just like...what does this solve? How is that helping solve anything?

#toxicmasculinity

[littleesecretss]

I’m so tired of people treating complex issues with an all or nothing attitude. It’s such a lazy and simple minded approach to a intricate conversation

[pusheenqueen]

It's always the same thing. In particular I always hear:

"But men have problems too!"

No one is saying men don't have problems. Everyone has problems. When I discuss women's issues and misogny and the way men benefit from that, so many men immediately equate feminism as something bad that will happen to them.
A lot of men see women being empowered as oppression for them. Wanting equality is asking for too much. Women are supposed to generally be available and yielding to the men in their lives and for us to even challenge that notion is depriving them of what they feel entitled to: our time, our bodies, our energy, our desires, our concerns should all adhere to/be at the disposal to the men in our lives, sometimes even men we don't know or haven't met. The opinions of our hypothetical boyfriend or husband should mean more to us than our current wants and needs; even our mothers will say "How will you get a man that way?" "What do you think your future husband will think of-?" because internalized misogny has taught them to teach their daughters the same old BS they heard growing up.

Oh and god forbid you're a man sincerely speaking against misogny. God forbid you as a man decide to not hate women.

[strawberrysangria]

Thank you! I'm sick of this "us vs them" mentality. Privilege doesn't mean perfection. It means recognizing that people struggle with things that others don't for unfair reasons. It's not hard to be courteous of each other's struggles without racing to the top or bottom. We all bleed!

[Bubaluve]

Just the fact that as a grown woman of 32 years old I had to get my husband's written permission to have my tubes tied, there is not a single procedure that my husband as a man needed me to sign off on unless he is incapacitated. Let that sink in.

[LoFiAxolotl]

As a men... it's definitely just a myth! I'm sure a woman can just go to an interview and be immediately taken serious and the interviewer won't just stare at her chest and make his assessment of her based on his physical attraction to her.... ohh wait nope that's still the case... as a CIS gay men... i see that shit all the time.... i literally sit in meetings where a woman can make a great point just to be ignored for a men to make the same point and it'll be applauded... i can't think of any interaction in society that doesn't disadvantage women....

[isabelmcgaugh]

It’s incredible that some men can identify the unreasonable standards and expectations put on them by our gender roles, but fail to identify that women also have those struggles, just on the flipped side. Ex. Men aren’t allowed to show emotions, women are written off as irrational because they’re too emotional. We’re all fighting against the same thing, it just negatively impacts us differently. Why would you double down on unfair roles instead of removing them for everyone?

[Sharie_mabari]

Just ask trans men how differently they're treated as a man than they ever were presenting as a woman, and you'll know it's not a myth.

[voidpunkprincess]

One of the most stubborn part of privilege, is those with privilege are completely capable of never seeing it.

[carnevalmefisto]

Very simple example:
In country where I'm from (Poland), it's illegal to make person sterile. THEORITICALLY.
Woman, no matter the age, who doesn't want kids (or more kids), can't be sterilized (if "illegal" doesn't pass during conversation with the gynecologist, it's simply a classic "what if you'll change your mind one day?"). Men? Easy, peasy, wasectomy next Tuesday, settled. Because wasectomy sometimes can be "undone", so there's no permanent "harm" done to the body = perfectly legal.
Pay gap. Men use this a lot to say it's a myth, because statistics usually deny that. But there's a thing: business place doesn't have to say in their statemets WHO EXACTLY has the lower and higher income. Just the "our employees have (let's say) $2500-$3000 monthly wage.". There's no obligation to include WHO EXACTLY earns those $2500 and who $3000 among all employees. My girl friend, who worked for an international corporation, after few YEARS of working there, accidentally discovered, along with other women, all females are getting $300 less every month, for exactly the same job (office job, not physical). It just poped in random conversation of her coworkers.
YES, it sucks for men to not have equal chances in court for child custody. But it could be due to statistics. We have a divorce lawyer in our family. He said he's not surprised women get full custody so often, even when some of those women are toxic. Lots, and I mean LOTS of fathers actually don't give an F about their kids and even go mental when getting to know they have to pay alimony for their offspring. Daddy cries and sobs in the court how the woman is about to take his precious kids away from them, but when asked, they have nothing to say about their children. Your son's best friend name? Not known. Your daughter's favourite color? Dunno. When kid has next doctors appointment? Wife takes care of it. Favourite subject a school? Eeeee... all of them? [let's face it, kids talk about those things all the time, it's not rocket science to get to know your child's favourite stuff] Sir, do you want a medal for knowing your children's names then? The fact it happens so often, hurts the great dads and children too (when they are left to stay with psycho mama). [Gladly, it changes lately and courts do tend to take fathers more seriously, unless he's an obvious manipulant].
YES, men have jobs where they risk their lives. Hard, physical jobs. But this argument is used so often, makes the feel like somebody wants to push agenda that every single man is working in a coal mine with XIX century safety standards and every single woman is a house wife, whos only job is to bake hubby a pie. Hard psychical jobs some women do are simply unseen and unappreciated. Because it's women job, and it's often related to looking after somebody else (elders for example. Lifting obese granpa or grandma is no biggie).

[LilaEule]

The question should not be "Who has it harder - woman or men?". The question should be "What are the things that make life hard - for woman and men - and how can we solve those problems?"

[kcl]

Not only does his argument sound absurd, being upset that men's voices aren't at the center of this debate is, ironically, a perfect example of male privilege.

[agoffgrid]

As a trans woman I can absolutely confirm that presenting as a man was a million times easier socially. But even when I'm a hundred percent passing as a woman people are absolute garbage and social life is so hard because they treat women like s***. I get completely ignored in hardware stores and if it wasn't for my favorite FFL paying attention I would get ignored at the gun counter too. I get explain how I don't know anything because I'm a woman wear what I said would be taken as gospel as a man. It's complete crap male privilege is extraordinary invasive and destructive to society and freaking annoying

[LapisLazuli]

If you want to see male privilege in action- how many laws restricting men's access to the basic human right to bodily autonomy and self-determination can you find being pushed through legislatures?

[summerrose]

As a woman who works in a male-dominated field I am constantly having to defend my right to be in the position that I'm in. I literally cannot imagine anyone turning to a man and asking him where his boss is, which is something that has happened to me. I can't imagine giving someone my professional opinion and having them ignore it until they hear the exact same thing come out of another man's mouth, and then it's magically transformed into the most brilliant advice ever. So, there's one kind of male privilege.

[dinosaurs_rule]

Well said! Happy pride month and men's mental health week everybody <3

[DoomShepherd]

"Men have problems too!"
*YES we know, let's do something about ALL our problems!*

[TheImanuelita]

I just love it when you hit the nail on the head like that. You are a true master of communication!!

[missnaomi]

My firstborn is a masc-presenting enby. But they spent the first 20 years of their life socialized as a girl. When they started to look masculine, they had so much (too much to list here) to tell me about how differently they were treated! Two big ones were not getting talked over/interrupted so much, and people moving out of their way when walking out in public.

[T_Cup]

Women: We all have problems, here are specific examples I've faced as a woman and loads of other women have expressed facing = maybe we should look at the root cause of those problems and change things starting there
These men: But men have problems too! Why aren't we talking about men?
Also these men: Stop trying to change things for men!
Also these men: Stop blaming men for preventing/redirecting conversations about societal problems and the majority of the problems themselves, it's "not all men"
It's a wonder we don't all end up with brain damage dealing with this rhetoric day in and day out

[fionatastic.]

Thanks for making this video because it helped me put words to something: Men also suffer in certain ways under patriarchy, but they must understand that they benefit from it overall when they make these arguments because why else would a lot of them work so hard to preserve it otherwise?