5 THINGS YOU MUST DO IF YOUR SPOUSE HAD AN AFFAIR

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[taylorashley]

Staying with. Cheater will eventually make you grow out of love, bitter, depressed. Life is short. Leave

[ThePossumone]

Unless you have been through this - you have No idea of the pain

[alanndonald]

My wife cheated on me 31 years ago and the pain is still there after all this time.

[pjconey]

Most of the time the spouse doesn't come up and tell you. Most of the time you find out for yourself. Cheaters are inherently liars, so how do you carry on a relationship with a liar.

[TheOlmonroe]

1. Leave/file for divorce
2. Help them pack
3. Go no contact (unless kids are involved)
4. Stay/maintain health (mental, physical, emotional and spiritual)
5. Repeat process starting at number 1

[darkhorse]

I can't imagine even thinking of cheating on my wife. I have been blessed beyond measure with the most beautiful, intelligent and understanding woman possible. I'm quick to say(not to her) that God chose her for me because I didn't have the good sense to choose that well for myself St that time. we've been married for 33 years and she ALWAYS makes every day terrific. I hope everyone finds someone that makes them feel like that

[ninasandranatashangowi]

God can do miracles. I cried after hearing this...being on the offended party is truly not a good situation to be in. I pray for marriages that are going through this thingss🙏🏾🙏🏾🤧

[CC-jjne]

Speaking from you can forgive but you’ll never forget. Don’t waste the time and effort. Cut your losses before losing more. Don’t even consider a second chance. Walk away. No matter what is said or who says it. Even if kids are involved. If you stay for the kids, be ready for your insides to be eaten alive. Expect depression, hatred, anger, unanswered questions, treatment as though your second best, and eventually punishment from the guilty for not getting over it simply because you’ve been told it was a mistake. You will become the salty dog that is responsible for the affair even if you were 100% innocent. A whole hearted relationship with the Holy Spirit is the only cure. And by the time you reach that level, you won’t need the unfaithful spouse. You will even come to the point of being told to shed yourself of the baggage.

[SheilaTrueLove]

The BETRAYAL is what I CAN'T deal with or get past. Thinking about all the LIES, and how to they can look you right in the FACE knowing they're stabbing you in the back. Just like Judas BETRAYED Christ. Betrayal is something I can NEVER live with.... EVER!!!😠😡😠😡

[X]

Guys and girls, if you have partners who cheated on you, have self-respect, be rational and logical. Just know that once your partner cheated on you, you can't go back to that relationship and it's not worth saving. Have self-respect, don't get mad at your partner and accept what has/had happened and move on. It's going to be hard at first, but trust me if the relationship is worth saving, cheating wouldn't have happened in the first place. It happened to me, and even in the midst of sadness I thank God I was able to be logical and rational. I moved on with life without regrets.... as for my wife she's been regretting it ever since. I was sad but I wasn't mad at her, I just showed her that I have self-respect. It's not worth blaming yourself, accept it, be logical and move on. IT IS NOT WORTH SAVING!!

[zolushka]

There's NO hope in betrayal! If he's done it once, he'll do it again! How can you look into the eyes of a person who betrayed you? How can you kiss him? Go to bed with him? I can't! Never will!

[martinwhite]

My advice if you’ve been cheated on is, regardless of whether you decide to stay, get your own house in order. Sort or review your finances, think of yourself, prioritise your own feelings and well being. Plan…plan ahead, have a plan b, c or d. Don’t leave yourself in a vulnerable situation by knee jerking on an immediate response or action. Work calmly on what you want in your life and make it happen

[NatashaHynes]

There's a difference between cheating one time (which the "offended" get's to decide to end it or not) and an affair. An affair is cheating, strategizing, planning, lying, manipulating, consistently over an extended period of time... if someone can do that to you LEAVE.
This post also doesn't consider that once someone gets away with cheating they will likely cheat again.
Nor does it consider NARCISSISTS... and psychopaths.
If they had an affair leave. If they had an affair and denied it when you confronted them, or blamed you for it RUN.

[Judeable]

If I knew what I know now these are the things I would have done.
1. Get alone to yourself and determine if you want to stay with this person. Take as much alone time as needed. If you are going to leave proceeded the the next step.
2. Tell your spouse that you are leaving. You have to be 100% committed. File a separation notice to them. Separate all joint accounts.
3. File for divorce. Determine who get custody if you have children.
4. Make little to no contact with them depending on whether or not you have children.
5. Move on with your life and never look back.

[willowstanton]

15yrs of marriage and my husband cheats on me the 2nd time (1st time was an emotional affair with another female) and leaves me to go move in with his 10yrs younger girlfriend. All this was going on while his mother was dying of lung cancer. He doesn't want to rush into filing papers for separation etc. Its like he wants the best of both worlds. This absolutely DESTROYED me💔

[mapssweetblk]

I found out this past weekend my husband of 6 years has been cheating. The emotions I'm going through are unexplainable

[felyabaria]

Once you knew he or she is cheating, get out. There is no respect in the marriage when someone do that . . There is no need to save this useless marriage. Let him or her go, learn your lessons and enjoy life to the fullest as a single person.

[marisagourley]

It is also very important to make a doctor appointment and get tested for STD. If your spouse has been sleeping with someone else as well as you it’s possible he passed something on to you. I think this is also very important bit of information to give people.

[stevenbrashear]

As genuine as it sounds, I personally don't agree with trying to salvage a marriage that has become a lost cause due to infidelity. What I would personally do if I were in this situation would be to seek counsel from trusted resources. Next, have an exit strategy as it would be considered best to leave the cheating spouse as it is a toxic situation. And lastly take care of yourself.

[phawtakhun]

I was once a victim of heart break. My husband was cheating on me for about 2 years in our marriage. When I became suspicious, he always says that I am looking for excuses since I haven't caught him. But there was allot of red flags and so I talked to a friend. who advised me and connected to some professional. Who helped me uncover everything with proofs, so he can't deny it. I was so devastated when I found out but I am glad I did. Because I was getting so troubled at heart. But after this, I found a way to gain back my inner peace. Sometimes it is better to know than to just keep being troubled at heart. I am happy that I did take those steps.