Stop Attracting Narcissists By Understanding Three Basic Interactions

Narcissistic abuse is an undeniable crisis. Discover Healing, Empowerment, and Authentic Living...

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The Royal We has helped Millions to escape the grip of narcissistic abuse. Here’s a deeper look into what narcissistic abuse looks like and steps to heal from it:

Narcissistic abuse looks like:

Lack of Empathy: Narcissists often show little to no empathy for others, making it easy for them to manipulate and exploit. Narcissists use various tactics such as gaslighting, love bombing, and devaluation to control and dominate their victims.

Common Tactics Used in Narcissistic Abuse:

Gaslighting: Making the victim doubt their own reality and sanity.
Love Bombing: Showering the victim with excessive attention and affection to gain control.

Devaluation: Undermining the victim’s self-worth through criticism, belittling, and emotional neglect.

Isolation: Cutting the victim off from their support systems to increase dependency on the abuser.

Triangulation: Using others to create jealousy or competition, keeping the victim feeling insecure.
Healing from Narcissistic Abuse

How to begin healing from narcissistic abuse:
Understand that you have been enduring narcissistic abuse. This awareness is the first step toward healing.

Get Help:

Establish No Contact or Low Contact:

Limit or completely cut off communication with the narcissistic abuser. This helps you gain emotional distance and begin your healing journey.
Rebuild Your Self-Esteem:

Engage in activities that boost your confidence and self-worth. Surround yourself with supportive, positive people who value and respect you.
Educate Yourself:

Learn about narcissistic abuse and its effects. Knowledge is empowering and can help you recognize patterns and avoid future toxic relationships.
Practice Self-Care:

Prioritize your physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Regular exercise, a healthy diet, adequate sleep, and mindfulness practices can all contribute to your recovery.
Set Boundaries:

Develop and maintain healthy boundaries in all your relationships.

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[marka.]

I invested into a seed and it grew into a huge Venus Fly Trap that took me 17 years to escape from.

[rina]

Never stay with someone by hoping that one day they'll change!! When you do that you just betray yourself and hurt yourself 💔

[lorrainehutter]

Riskiest human interaction? Exposing a narcissist.

[nononsenseBennett]

Being a giving, generous person only goes so far until you realize you are just being taken advantage of. Being a nice, giving person is a trap. All relationships MUST be a two way street where one gives one day and the other gives the next. That's a healthy model. Stay away from anyone who takes and takes and doesn't reciprocate. This will calm your soul.

[PassionateFlower]

I made the decision to live out of my car this year because otherwise I would still be living with my narcissistic mother which was slowly killing me. I may still die yet living out of my car but at least this way if I die I did it on my own terms trying to break away instead of letting that dementor continue sucking out the last few drops of my life force energy.

I doordash and just started an office job. Obviously my employer doesn't know the reality of my circumstances. I'm just there to do my work, collect a paycheck, and save up for my own place.

I'm going to do this without my narc family's help aka interference because otherwise I'll never make it on my own or I'll have to owe all my success to them if I'm able to get some financial stability finally.

I do not want them to be able to take credit for everything I'm trying to do. I want to accomplish things despite their abuse. I do not want to feel like I was only able to accomplish anything all because of all their "help". I do not want to feel indebted to monsters✌. I want to be self sufficient in my own right. Not because of them. Not to please them. Not to entertain them. Not to make them look better or feel better. I'm no contact with my entire immediate and extended family except I am low contact with my mother ONLY because I still receive mail at her house and I am saving for a P.O. Box while also struggling to stay on top of my monthly bills.

At 31 I'm finally building some grit. I was enabled to fail my whole life by my much more accomplished controlling gaslighting insecure narcissistic highly educated yet abysmally immature "parents". They gave me fish instead of teaching my how to fish for myself because it was just always easier and quicker for then to just do everything for me, further indebting me to them as an emotional indentured servant. Then mocking and berating me for having zero life skills. Chastising me for my inability to maintain a long term relationship. Picking on me for picking lame abusive or neglectful partners then gloating about their ability to find superior mates and making better choices in their lives than I am able to make in my life.

Treating me like I'm too smart to act so stupid and wasting all my potential then turning around and acting like I have absolutely no intelligence and will always be a dunce and could never challenge or rival their superior intellects with my pathetic insufficient brain matter.

So yes. I now sleep in my car in Safeway parking lots at night. I shower at 24 hour fitness. I do my laundry at the laundromat. I do not see or speak to any family members except to collect my mail from my mother's once or twice a month until I get the P.O. Box. I talk to my therapist twice a week for 50 minute sessions. I call Warmlines for extra support. I continue to educate myself about healing and recovery from trauma. I exercise at the gym. I take my vitamins. I cry myself to sleep. My stuffed animals are my best friends. They are always there for me, they listen, they offer hugs anytime, they don't judge, and they comfort me in the middle of the night when I get scared.

Is this a sad and pathetic lonely weird little life? Sure. But is it any more sad and pathetic than wasting away in a house with 4 walls letting an abuser emotionally gut your insides on a daily basis because you're too afraid to face the world alone?

And like I said I work two jobs doordash and office work so it's not like I'm out there panhandling and doping. I pay my taxes. I maintain my vehicle.

I do not drink. I never smoked. I never tried hard drugs. I do not ingest Marijuana. I am neat and tidy and I have a decent commuter car it's not like I'm some offensive looking homeless person I'm very discrete and keep things orderly.

There are a lot of tax paying, law abiding, sober, working adults who are living out of their cars simply due to inflation and housing costs and of course, the need to evade abusive housing situations.

[rosemarie]

I saw a quote that hit hard. "If you give too much, too soon, they'll fall in love with your hand, not your heart".
Also, another way to avoid a relationship with a narc? Don't sleep with them until at least 5 months into the romance, but don't give them your pre-determined date or they will push, shove, then wait you out. A narc gets high off of pushing you beyond any personal boundary. Once they have you hooked, you lose your value. Most don't have the self discipline to stay if you don't succumb to their love bombing and boundary pushing. Stay strong!

[Hawelufamily]

I invested in a 27 year marriage to a narc and nothing grew of it. Always in poverty, never loved, and used for what I put into the relationship. I can’t even have a regular relationship with my grown children. It’s like all my efforts never paid off in the way they should have. Wasted years. My advice, get out as soon as you know what you are dealing with. Unfortunately for me I had no idea he was a narcissist until it was too late. Prayer does not work for these types of people. My prayers didn’t work, all it did was keep me in bondage to him.

[marilynwarbis]

People who truly give don't draw attention to it. Those who claim to be giving and who give many gifts to people, are in fact manipulators who use the gifts to insert themselves across other people's boundaries.

[SuzkaMares]

This is really important for people dealing with narcissistic parents that use money as a form of financial abuse. Break free from them as soon as possible and never look back. The price you have to pay regarding your self-worth (accepting their money) isn't worth it.

[athena]

Me to my young self 50 years ago: Just stay out of relationships; you will be happier and freer.

[debraschepers]

Well I'm 70 now n well I really don't care because I keep to myself. Wonder why. I attract every one of them even wanting to be friends. I attract people like flied n they turn out to be nuts!!! So I'm fine. By myself. Yay

[drkknath]

Unless you are wealthy and fulfilled from inside, giving is futile and only brings resentment. And that is not the right way of giving. Amazing massage.

[euphoniahale]

I started seeing a counselor quite a few years ago. He said we need to be number one in our own lives. If I can’t love myself and take care of myself how can I take care of someone else and love them.

[ImBetty]

Kevin, when you explained that “narcs won’t allow us to equally exchange, that they are looking to be the one to give so that they can weaponize it and ultimately hold it over our heads, causing us to feel guilt and shame and live in a place where we feel like we owe them perhaps for the rest of our lives”, I finally was able to understand where this feeling of guilt comes from. You have unlocked a door and helped to free me from my feelings of guilt and owing. One of your best messages! ❤🎉

[iteaire]

Wow…. Mic dropped when he said a narcissistic relationship is about confusing all three types of relationships. Holy smokes!!!! I arranged my marriage with a short term boyfriend for a mutually beneficial outcome. 8 years later, he blurred the lines of the relationship, his part of the deal has been fulfilled but I’m still waiting empty handed and since he also developed an auto immune issue I’ve had to wait on him hand and foot. I’m so disgusted with how I’ve allowed him to treat me, now I’m just working on my financial strategy out of this sexless, loveless, verbally and emotionally abusive relationship. He wasted my 20’s but with his illness and personality he’ll get what’s coming to him in the end. 🙏

[mapleleaf]

I invested so much in a one sided marriage that I am exhausted. I no longer feel obligated and getting my life back. One step at a time.

[dwlsn]

I learned about the money control at 28. One day, it just dawned on me that she (mom) was trying to keep me dependent on her by always giving me money 💰. I was broke (worked full time, divorced with 2 kids). When it hit me, I politely declined. It threw her for a loop ➰ but I felt free, so I told myself “never again” would I accept 💲 from her. Years later, I didn’t have a choice - but I paid her back - still free. Ultimately, many years later, for the sake of my sanity - I cut all ties & began my healing journey. You can’t really heal until you remove the toxicity in your life. Once the core is removed and the “lights” come on - any other toxins find a way to leave. Let them go. Bid them a fond adieu & continue giving back to yourself everything you used to give away to others who only wanted you for their benefit. 😢

[samanthamariah]

The difference between investing and giving in this video is important. I’m always looking for how I can keep out of another abusive relationship and this is quite helpful.

[annabanzon]

I am that giving person. I guess I do it to feel free from needing anything from others.

[elonnamills]

LEARNDED MY LESSONS...DROPPED THAT CYCLE GOOD....!