5 Signs It’s Enmeshment Trauma, NOT Love

Enmeshment is a complex aspect of relationships that often blurs the lines between love and toxicity. Enmeshment trauma refers to the emotional and psychological consequences that arise from overly intertwined or codependent relationships. In such dynamics, personal boundaries become blurred, and individuals may struggle to establish a healthy sense of self. This can lead to emotional difficulties, hindered personal growth, and challenges in forming autonomous connections.

To shed light on this topic, we made a video on enmeshment to help you differentiate the difference between healthy love and toxic enmeshment.

#enmeshment #love #trauma

Writer: Chloe Avenasa
Editor: Caitlin McColl
Script Manager: Kelly Soong
Voice Over: Brandon
Animator: Mavelyn
Youtube Manager: Cindy Cheong

References:

[flamegamer]

I’ve never heard of the term “enmeshment” before until now. I’m glad I learned what it means and what makes it so different from love.

[TseringChoedon-bunz]

1:00 Loss of personal identity
1:34 Lack of emotional boundaries
2:13 Loss of personal interests and friendships
2:58 Lack of autonomy
3:31 Absence of healthy conflict resolution
Hope it helps🤍

[christopherhadsell]

My ex was a bit enmeshed with me--thanks for this video! I was less--so--he felt unloved. Of course, with this dynamic going on, I found it next to impossible to talk about "real" things with him. He would get all prickly if I even mentioned something. Needless to say, we're not together any longer. I have met someone new. It's really early stages, but I like we're taking it real slow! Lots of time to feel out each other's boundaries--give autonomy--give him his space--give me mine. when I see this, it makes me think he and I might have a meaningful relationship after all--he says he's really comfortable around me! Plus, I love the way I can get him to laugh! Laughter is so important!

[lizillusion]

My bf and I are SUPER close, affectionate, and have anxiety and self-esteem issues. So knowing that, I always like to make sure this kinda thing doesn’t happen with us. Luckily we don’t relate to any of those, so we’re on the right trajectory. Communication is key folks. With that, you can solve a lot of these problems!!

[storyteller]

I’m stuck in one where my life goal is to help people grow and become capable of helping themselves grow into the best person they can be, but the relationship is my dysfunctional family, where I can’t cease to love them as I have nothing else to tie me to life, but my thoughts are getting unhealthfully violent with everything unhealthy in the house, yet I can’t bare to leave them as they are my only support, and all of them are just as much victims of each other as they are to themselves…

I grew up with this situation, I lived with this kind of 'love', no matter how distanced it was, and how so little moments I had in my life where it was actually good at home, I adapted and learned to make due with it.

[aesthetenesjah]

I’ve never heard of enmeshment until now. Very insightful! Thank you!

[kiwi_rainbows]

This is such an important topic that really needs more awareness drawn to it. Thank you for this video!

[TBNAfrangsYT]

Thanks for this video. I never thought I’d understand why my friends would have me be their slacker, but this helps.

[Glockenspheal]

This is a very important topic and one I resonate with a lot, I used to have very low self-esteem that lead me into a very destructive path, thankfully that is way past behind me, although I still have some remnants of these traits, I think it's normal, but I've always advocated for working on one's self-esteem since, I'd love for more videos that go into such details.

Other topics I'd like covered would be like... alternatives or ways to seek therapy, since it is quite hard for some people to get it, I think it would help the people who struggle and can't get therapy in the meantime, or are afraid to ask for help and such.

[Aan]

Timestamps
1). Loss of personal identity 0:59
2). Lack of emotional boundaries 1:33
3). Loss of personal interests and friendships 2:12
4). Lack of autonomy 2:57
5). Absence of healthy conflict resolution 3:31

Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. Sorry this is so late. 💙💙💙💙💙💙

[LesleySASMR]

Thanks to your video, I finally figured out what my five year long relationship really was. I’m still working towards healthy love toward others and myself.

[ricksdarkness]

I had a partner that would spent the entire day doing phone calls with me, leaving me with little to no personal space. When I asked about for a bit of space, they would try to make me feel guilty for "not wanting to spend time with them". They also would experience constant mood swings and I would demand me to make them feel better or else they'd say I'm a bad partner for not being able to do so.
We broke up 9 months ago and I'm still healing.

[m.ridzwan-]

This is so true, I've experienced some of those mentioned in the video. Luckily things got a bit better after some self reflection.

[gateyyourlocaltherapist]

..I just got the biggest shock from this……

[IlmurOsp]

this is exactly what's happening with me. there was a particularily intense incident the other day that genuinely scared me, and i don't know how i can possibly get out of it.

[indulgence]

I'd like to think enmeshment doesn't mean the absence of love, but perhaps the relationship just needs some ironing.

[sstrwbrryyy]

is this video supposed to be unlisted? its quiet helpful and id like to know more about it specific to each relationship. like enmeshment in romantic relationships and enmeshment in familial relationships specifically parent-child

also i hope you guys can do a video on emotional incest, maybe in the more common mother-son sense. maybe also a video on enmeshment vs emotional incest?

i think im watching my partner live through these things and hope to help him more understand himself and the trauma his family has inflicted on him

[EsmeAmelia]

Can you please make a follow-up video that deals with how to heal from being raised in an enmeshed family and STILL having enmeshment problems with said family even as an adult? I'm on the verge of snapping from enmeshment issues with my own family.

[chisaten]

Finally, a video that has correct captioning in the video! Why did it take weeks for the video captioning to have this?

[spinoodles]

Oh… 😭

where was this a year ago for me fr 💔

highkey hope they see this video because this makes everything make so much sense