A deep dive into physical attraction

Chapters
0:00 What is attractive?
7:42 Scott and Divine: A Very Short Introduction
13:44 Scott Smith's trolling | Long-term partnerships
24:28 Impatience in dating and finding partnerships
28:38 Your "passport wife" won't be your dream "trad wife"

Sources | References

Socials | Support My Work!
🐦 Twitter → @kidology_co
✍️ Substack (coming soon...) → Kidology
🙇‍♂️ Patreon | Thank you so much for your support! → Kidology

Equipment | Affiliate Links

NB. I receive a small commission from your use of these links. This has no impact on your purchase. Thank you so much for this additional support to the channel!

#passportbros #90dayfiance #manosphere #redpill #attraction #datingadvice #moderndating #modernlife

[Paroex]

I think the reason why so many incels and manosphere guys feel the need to assert that this relationship is a sham, is because if they had to accept the fact that conventionally less attractive men can be with a more attractive woman, they can no longer blame their own looks as the reason why they're alone. And then they'd have to grapple with the realisation that hey, it's actually my shitty personality that's putting women off.

[ajajajaybie]

have you ever seen someone’s craziest “hear me out” crush? i’ve seen people admit online they are attracted to questionable tv/ movie/ video game characters that are not conventionally attractive, and sometimes not even human. it’s about demeanour, work ethic, talents, how someone talks, how they move, and so much more that makes up attraction.

[Moeller]

Scott might not have been born with conventionally attractive features, but the guy clearly takes good care of himself. His hair is well done, his clothes is flattering on him and he seems fit. I don't think most guys realize how attractive that alone is

[pau]

I know Scott personally. I know his family, I used to be friends with his sister when i was in high school, Scott is a very solid, attentive dude, smart af, he makes bomb ass food and has a killer sense of humor and personality. When you know him in person, it makes sense that he bagged a baddie with a good head on her shoulders🤷🏽‍♀️ but a lot of men out here with their egos all hurt because they’re entitled and feel like they have something to offer that Scott doesn’t have. When the reality is, women prefer solid men who will make us feel good, respected and cherished over some misogynistic chad with no real qualities of humanity or empathy, who worries ab imaginary gold diggers of his imaginary “gold”, obsessed with body counts and has a shit ass personality, but men are gonna deflect and avoid that conversation at all costs and we all know that🤷🏽‍♀️

[averyuncreativeusername]

It's sad that people think that this man should not deserve love because of this attractiveness. It really shows how much being physically attractive matters today. People forget that just being a good kind-hearted person with self confidence could attract people. This case really shows the tiktokification of standards in society and what people truly value.

[kmac]

Honestly I get why she fell in love with him. He comes across as someone who is secure with himself, has a good sense of humour and charisma.
When you fall in love with someone it genuinely is not a case of overlooking them not being physically attractive. Those unconventional features do become endearing and attractive because they are tied to a person you really adore.

[missbstuurman]

The world doesn't like ugly people, especially when they find love😢😢

[nocturnal_daydreaming]

I think it shows how ableist society is by just jumping to "he's ugly she can do better" when he has a chronic illness...its like they're saying she deserves someone who doesn't have a disability/disease. It makes sense though because we often associate health and attractiveness with "high value" or nicer people.

[younggod]

As a culture, we rarely show attractive and ugly people next to each other, let alone being in a relationship together. It gets to the point where I think people look at this couple, and see basically a cartoon crossover. To realities, with completely different artstyles, that somehow yet combine. I dare say, it triggers the uncanny valley effect in some people.

[ms.mittenz]

Just entered a relationship with a man who is significantly less conventionally attractive than me... i feel the stares tbh. Being a foreigner, I also feel that people judge me without knowing.. that they think im using him.
He has less money than me, and i've been in this country for 10 years (meaning i have permanent residence) so, wth am i using him for?
Truth is.. hes just nice. Kind, as he says it. Pure heart, full of care. Sees my insecurities and wants to help me leave them behind. He genuinely cares for me. Yes, he likes how i look, but hes willing to do so much for me, just to make me smile. Even with the pain he suffers daily (chronic nerve pain) he still just wants me to be comfortable and good after a days work.

I love them btw :)

[bigheadrhino]

I think when you're just looking at pictures or watching a screen, it's easy to think of attractiveness as some quantifiable thing, but when you feel the pull from someone in real life, you can't really describe exactly what it is that you are attracted to, and when you are in love you couldn't care less what other people think of the person you're with. After all if you are really love someone, you would want to be with them for a lifetime, which means they will get old and not fit a stereotypical definition of "attractiveness" anyways.

[goldenlioness]

Not being nice but genuinely being kind to everyone is what we need.

[sleepingstudy]

i mean, when i first started dating my boyfriend a lot of people were hating on my choice saying that i was wayyy too pretty for him. i’ve always have been known for my looks and such and have a lot of people interested in me. people found it odd that i chose him. but i didn’t even realize that other people found him unattractive, because his looks drew me in first.

[kozad]

I think some of the saddest moments I’ve seen in life are when people do not pursue a relationship with someone because their peers deem that potential date to be unattractive. Worry less about what your “friends” think and more about your own happiness.

[fredkrissman]

As a retired cultural anthropologist in the USA that specialized in international migration, I've got to say your segment on "passport wives" in America (or "the West" generally) is brilliant!
Kudos from a new subber.

[withlovetumi]

Hearing you read those Twitter comments honestly broke my heart. It's crazy how comfortable people have gotten with being mean on the internet. Especially towards people they don't know.

[lilyrecords]

Growing up I always thought I was a disgusting ugly beast due to teasing and general low self esteem. When people are attracted to me I feel like they're joking and I start feeling really insecure and awkward. After all these years of feeling horrific about myself Ive slowly started to accept the fact I am just an average looking woman, and as I've began to accept this it seems due to the media we all constantly consume that average isnt good enough anymore- average is the new ugly. Which is ridiculous, frustrating and generally upsetting. It is important to be attracted to the person you're with, but there is no excuse to insult people for their looks. Personally I know how destructive it is to ones self image and importance, and I feel like it's just going go get worse and worse. Thank you for another fantastic video Kid.

[technojunkie]

I've actually known Scott & Divine IRL! So when I saw your thumbnail I was like "👀 wait a sec... is that Scott!?" I don't have Tik Tok so I've only tangentially heard about how popular their content had become, and I'm sad at the hate people are throwing their way. It's not my place to talk about their lives more than they've already shared, but I can confirm that the story of how they got together that Kidology summed up is 100% true! They had talked to each other for years before deciding to get married, and being a social media couple was not something they had decided on until a while after they were married. Glad to see they're doing well and trolling the trolls they get haha

[LillianGraceFullofficial]

They’re both slaying. the fact that they’re making funny jokes instead of getting offended by the trolls is so amazing.

[sayulika]

This may sound corny but to me personality and charisma are everything. In my teens there was a very conventionally attractive girl in school, who I really admired because I was kind of an ugly duckling. This girl turned out to be one of my bullies and as soon as I realized this she suddenly became so unattractive to me. You can be the most conventionally beautiful person in the world but if you have a garbage personality this makes me instantly see you as ugly. It's as simple as that.