How To Stop Feeling Resentment & Disappointment In Your Relationship

Link to blog post:

Thanks,
Noah Elkrief

[elisadehoyos]

I like the speed and volume of your voice...allows the listener to REALLY TAKE IT IN...good job

[AvariPlays]

I think he doesn't mean that a person can treat you bad and you should just accept it. It's more about being happy with oneself alone and not needing a relationship to make you feel happy. I think people who are looking for this are smart enough to understand that.

[KTB]

The quality of your life is directly proportional to the quality of your thoughts, the water you drink, the food you eat, the way you move, and the words you use. I loved your video. Thank you so much.

[dris]

Noah, I believe your videos are the best of their kind anywhere. I've seen hundreds of these types of self help videos, and most are cookie cutter and don't do much. Your videos are almost magic! Thank you

[clementeen]

I agree with the aspects that a relationship cannot fulfil you, but I disagree that you cannot blame your partner. If you both talked about standards and needs and your partner doesn't meet those needs they are to blame for that not you. If your partner treats you like nothing, neglects you, abandons you and isn't present with you, how are you to blame for that?

[EliMs]

truth!!! this is the reason why if one feels unfulfilled as a single he'll feel the same in a relationship

[Cavergirl]

I’m sitting here next to a lake, listening to your words and weeping. Thank you for your words, this was beautiful

[Joshuarcade]

thank you. i wish i had you to teach me growing up. but it's never too late to be happy :) thanks again! God bless you!

[Lisarata]

This surprised me in how useful it is. I need to stop pinning my unhappiness on my spouse. I think this is going to take a lot of repeated reminders until it catches. And then I need to find my fulfillments.

[NoahElkrief]

Yes, if we are in a relationship and unhappy... the first thing to do is look at the thoughts in our mind. To see if our unhappiness is created by thoughts. If it seems that we just don't enjoy being around our partner, we would leave. If our suffering is created by thoughts, we can question the thoughts to disbelieve them. Then, if we become happy in the relationship, we stay. If not, we go.

[jacquelinekoufou]

Noah has helped me enormously during a dark period in my life. He speaks in such a way he cannot fail to envelop the listener with his gentle good sense.

[NoahElkrief]

Hi Ana, since I'm not sure how you interpreted the video in this way, I don't know how to adress your question. This video is about seeing that a relationship can't make you happy. Another human being doesn't have the ability to eliminate all the negative thoughts in your mind. No matter how "perfect" your partner is, they can't eliminate your anxiety, worries about what people think, insecurities, judgments, and so on. Therefore, it is not our partner's fault that we are unhappy.

[sincityquinn]

There is no such thing as the perfect partner or soul mate.

[liselbg]

Wow. This is so helpful, and puts my unhappiness back on me. Thanks for your words of wisdom.

[fatimaamier]

I agree... Gonna start to stop thinking these horrible thoughts which are destroying my mind. Thank You

[NoahElkrief]

Hi Rangeorge, yeah, it's the same thing as "the work" in that it's all about disbelieving thoughts. Just providing some different angles on how to see they're not true.

[lilahmartin]

Living with a partner with traits of BPD creates a huge challenge in keeping spite and resentment in check. I never used to have an issue with holding a grudge, but I cannot seem to forget the words and actions which cause me such turmoil. I see my part in it and try and constantly fail to avoid triggering them, but I feel I’ll never be good enough to keep them from turning Jekyll /Hyde on me.

[alinaa]

Sometimes the resentment and disappointment is directly a result of unintentional harmful/hurtful actions of your partner, it has nothing to do with seeking fulfillment and happiness solely through your relationship. People can and will let us down, in other relationships we can walk away or put up strong boundaries. In a romantic committed relationship, we can do the same but to a limited extent. What about these cases? How do we forgive and move on.

[Schwabian]

Relationships in today’s world are overrated.. screens and phones dominate along with porn and relationship websites. Best to focus on finding self love.. it’s less disappointing

[anniepyron]

Thank you Noah. I "know this" but needed some deeper exploration.