Cause of Victim Mentality | Explained by a Psychiatrist

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Victim mentality, victim-blaming, and victimization are examples of abusive or toxic communication. Victim mentality or self-victimization can be described as an abusive relationship with oneself.

In this video, Dr. K explains why people victimize themselves.

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#MentalHealth #VictimBlaming #VictimMentality

[Ailieorz]

Victim mentality also pushes responsibility onto someone else, anyone else, for a person's problems. It's never THEIR fault. They're the victim, even when it's 100% their fault

[Bassa]

I stood up and started applauding in front of the TV when he said "someone who victimizes themselves is in an abusive relationship with themselves". What an ingenious conceptualization!

[MyStutteringLife]

YES YES & YES !! I used to have that victim mindset because of my stutter, the jobs I lost, the opportunities that I lost, but once I stopped fighting my stutter, embraced it, accepted it, it allowed me to pursue my dreams NO MATTER WHAT! My stutter does not define me it's just what I have and I'm focusing on achieving my goals, chasing my dreams, stutter and all.

[GES]

I've also known people who refuse to acknowledge they're in a bad situation. "I'm always the victim" is bad and prevents action. So does saying "this is my responsibility" and stopping right there without trying to resolve anything. Yes, attitude adjustments are almost always necessary. But sometimes doing things about situations that are hurting you or at least recognizing that things really are unfair is a step towards getting better.

[pngproductions]

deflection, Victim mentality also pushes responsibility onto someone else, anyone else, besides themselves. They don't want the uncomfortable work to take the responsibility to make the changes because then they will have to accept realities

[NismospoolinOfficial]

These videos are 1000% helpful and i will continue to share these while there is air i. My lungs.

[ranaslay]

Oftentimes people with a victim complex in relationships use this complex to relieve themselves so they never have to realize the damage they're actually doing to their partner, let alone take responsibility for it. Example: you try to talk to your partner about something they've done that upset you and they turn it into ''I can never do anything right, I can never be good'' instead of listening to you properly, you can especially tell it's a victim complex when you're an adult with good, gentle and open communication who's affectionate and attentive, and yet your partner still makes it about themselves and tries to guilt trip you for speaking up when THEY hurt you. And when you break up, this mindset doesn't change either, no matter what you've done they'd rather pretend you were the bad guy than ever consider looking back at their actions. These are the type that especially are dangerous for empathetic people because you will feel sorry for them and try to make them see they're ''good'' and ''worthy'' even though they were the ones who hurt you in the first place.

[isobelangeli]

Every time I dig deeper into my suspected NPD ex the more I see how messed up he is . He was ALWAYS A VICTIM he lied to make himself a victim even if he was objectively the aggressor. He is in an abusive relationship with himself and he abuses everyone . He also can’t take responsibility for anything.

[frankkennedy]

I don't think people know the difference between Victim Mentality and actual Victims. I'm Not claiming to be a victim in the general sense of the term. I'm just tired of shit happening to me and people basically saying I don't have the right to be upset about it and calling me a liar when I voice my frustrations.

[PaigeSquared]

"choosing the comfortable over the good."

I'll never forget when i realized my mother would always choose her own immediate comfort over what was right or good. It was extremely baffling for me, before that realization.

[negi]

I feel like im being undressed to the bones in this video 💀.

My dad changed now, but he would call me a pig, "i can just make another son", and "Youre weird, be normal". He would tell this things to me. Which is understandable and forgiveable because everyday he would travel from town a to town b then back to town a everyday. Exhausted physically and mentally. he was also from a broken home so he doesn't know whats a good one.

He was not violent (sometimes if i deserve it lol) but his words stays with me til this day. I thought it was normal for one to hate themselves. Its not easy for me to break up with my abusive self. It has been there for a long time. If it wasn't there i feel uncomfortable, like something was missing.

It would call me weak for not having to break up with it, and i thought it was right. It would call me names everytime a memory of a regretful thing or shameful thing came to mind. So with it still there to this day, after i tried to run away from it by burying myself with college and then with competitive games. 10+ hours a day with no rest. It was still there.

So here i am. I attempted suicide but i didnt go through with it because i was afraid of god and the punishment that would came if i did it (im a muslim, although not a perfect one i still try my best to follow it). I hate myself for being a coward. Its very selfish of me to my family for doing this i know. But i just dont know what to do, i didnt have any reasons to drive my abusive self away. I dont know if i want to be happy, im scared of it and i dont know why. "Im damaged goods" i think to myself because everybody can overcome this, then why cant i? And my problem is not as big as other people in this world. That made me think about how weak i am and how i do not deserve to suffer from this because ppl had it worse, I hate myself for it.

If you read through this long wall of text, thank you.

[aksa_theexplorer]

Abusive relationship toward themselves and literally every single person around

[bchristian]

It creates a self re-enforcing cycle as well. Normies hate people who have fallen into a victim mentality, the kind of people who are always in misery but can never seem to help themselves. Their friends try to give advice, yet they can't get over the hump. Eventually the friends stop coming around and the person cannot make new friends because nobody wants to be around a perpetual victim who won't help themselves, and the person see this as being victimized yet again. It's an endless cycle.

[nachannachle]

I LOVE you man. You are so efficient at bulldozing the BS that people tell themselves to avoid themselves.
Hats off! <3

[alejrandom]

Holy shit, I didn't know I needed so much to see a psychiatrist cussing like a normal human being ♡

[Cc]

I don’t like victim being this bad dirty word.. it’s what prevents them from reaching out for help in the first place. Let’s be real, whether it’s child abuse or between a couple- how many times have we seen cases where they did attempt to reach out for help many times and were let down, dismissed or even turned into the bad guy in the scenario? All of that reinforces feeling worthless and deserving of abuse.. so i’d prefer if we didn’t oversimplify and generalize victims of abuse.. this is an old af clip so i’m assuming and hoping you don’t have as generalized of an opinion anymore on this topic..

[uperM]

Self victimization is like flogging yourself to absolve yourself of sin.

[Chippy]

I don’t believe most people play the victim to manipulate or want sympathy. Also it’s not always because it’s familiar. Having OCD and ADHD and fearing the paralyzing anxiety that comes with standing up for yourself is not worth it. People can be walked on and have had negatively instilled in them my their mother, are a victim. It’s not easy to get confidence and be strong. Sounds easy.

[machinegurlll]

This helped me so much more than anything else I've watched or read or been told in therapy.

[MiYa-uick]

I told my best friend of 7 years that she tends to have a victim mindset. I told her this in a very healthy, calm way and I approached this matter calmly (I study psychology). I told her I said it for good intentions and that I wish the best for her. I want her to get better and reflect on herself and so on.

It backfired and she sent me a long text of how I hurt her, that I told her this for my own good, she called me selfish and how I am a shitty friend etc. She also said some things that actually aren’t right by facts, things she say I said but I never said to her or anyone. Tonight I will see her and we will talk about this matter. That’s why I’m researching some stuff about this topic to refresh this information for my brain, to make sure I’m seeing things with the right mind.
But i can’t seem to shake loose this whole victim mindset that I keep seeing in her behaviour/texts…

If anyone reads this, share your opinion please, I would gladly read them. Thank you.