Psychiatrist Explains: Where Social Anxiety Begins

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#Anxiety #SocialAnxiety #MentalHealth

[nobodyofimportance]

Man, I just want to be healthy. I don't even care about achieving any nebulous ideal of 'happiness', I just want to be able to go out in public and not suffer intense background anxiety every time, I just want to be able to meet new people and not avoid them because of the anxiety, I just want to be able to live a normal bloody life

[MrRobotrax]

My superpower is having social anxiety despite never being bullied

[jonathanmarkov]

“You are not a machine with broken parts. You are a human being with unmet needs.”
-Johann Hari

[nickmarchak]

My girlfriend has social anxiety and as someone who is basically socially fearless I struggle to understand and relate, but I want to be as supportive as I can bc I love her. This helped a lot. Thanks Dr K

[BrokenArrowX]

Even the simplest things like going to the grocery store are scary to me because the thought of having to talk to the cashier is terrifying. It feels like I've lost my best years in high school and uni to anxiety.

I will try to apply your knowledge and see where that leads me. Your video has really opened my eyes.

[nate]

It's actualy insane that he puts this for free on the Internet. What a GOAT

[piecheeseboy]

“Thankfully he didn’t lose his PSP” Dr. K knows what’s important

[DeusEx]

You're never broken. Your brain/mind always try to work in your favour, however misguided and pain-inducing that can be. That goes for everything, not just social anxiety. You're always doing your best based on your current understanding. Some of your positive qualities might be clouded by your struggles, but you don't deserve the pain you're feeling. Good luck on your journey, I wish you all the best.

[tisen.]

even online I feel anxious. I literally can’t play multiplayer games, with other people. there are so many opportunities I wasted, friends I didn’t make because of anxiety. I hate it so much.

[leowulf]

I wasn't quite bullied, but I never fit into any kinds of groups at school. This is a quote from somewhere but "Too cool to be a nerd, too nerdy to be anything else." Basically defined my school life. Some people liked me but I didn't really have common ground with anyone.

Didn't help that I moved schools super frequently. By the time I graduated High School I'd been to 18 different schools. So I think after my early elementary school years of actually making friendships only to lose them, I just stopped trying to make friends since I knew it wouldn't last anyway.

[anthonyorr]

I'm realizing now that the social anxiety I had for much of my life was triggered by conversations, not eyes; I could be the center of attention as long as nobody was interacting directly with me. When I was a kid, I was the weird kid and often felt easily dismissed or misunderstood when I actually did have something to say, so I learned to avoid conversations to avoid embarrassment. Instead, I learned that people will like you if you can do something impressive, so I ended up overcompensating by trying to be the best at anything that came along. Fast forward 15 years; I'm a musician and I feel no anxiety on stage because it's my time to shine, but as soon as I step off stage I retreat to the corners and try not to say anything because I couldn't hold a conversation to save my life. Another 5 years and I have learned to deal with most of the issues, and looking back, it's because I learned some of the strategies you suggest. I noticed I was feeling fear anytime someone talked to me, but I tried to practice conversating and allowed myself to turn away when I needed to. Eventually, the joy of having friends was stronger than the fear of embarrassment and so conversations are much easier for me now.

Thank you for this video, it helps so much for me to put into words and thoughts what I was only vaguely aware of before <3

[XXallycatXX]

When I was 4 years old both of my parents would yell at me every time I tried to get their attention. This would prevent me from trying to talk to classmates, kids on the playground, and even coworkers in my adult life. How you treat a child affects them forever. But knowing it's not a life sentence is comforting.

[meeshaylestone]

I don’t know how to convey everything this video has done for me. I’ve spent the last 12 years in therapy with medication to handle my social anxiety and no one has ever, EVER just spoken to me like this about it.

I wrote a psych paper in community college, 2018 about my social anxiety because i was so enthralled with the instincts that came to people through animal nature. I didn’t understand WHY it made so much sense and even though my psych teacher loved my essay; she couldn’t even answer why it related so well.

I started sobbing half way through because i somehow managed to solve my entire problem with social anxiety from 2018. I know how to move forward now.

I’m still in therapy and I cannot WAIT to scream about this to my therapist. I really hope somehow through this delirious mess you understand how grateful for what you and this channel do for people like me, who lived the EXACT same life as Adam did.

[cryppi]

Honestly, to hear that how I act online is my normal self is so endlessly relieving. I always get worried about telling people I have social anxiety, I don't know which is the real me-- online me, or my personality in person shrouded with anxiety? To know online me is just my real self with my critical thinking and higher functioning brain actually at work just makes me so happy.

[klaxxon]

Dr. K is setting very high bars for therapists. His ability to explain problems and solutions eloquently is amazing!

[peipeixi]

This vid spoke out to me. Nobody understands social anxiety better than those who actually live with it. Social anxiety can be the simple things others would consider as normal. For me, saying hello or being the initiator of a conversation is a big no. I dread human interactions. I dread being just in a room filled with people. It's much deeper than just not wanting to be around people. It's the intrusive thoughts. It's the lack of self-esteem or worse, it's deeply rooted in childhood trauma.

[ALPHAdog]

When I was depressed and very anxious in middle school (ended up staying home alot) one of the worst feeling I had would be finally managing to get to class, but I would be late so the whole class would always look at you. That feeling always felt like shit. I never had a at school bully tho, but similar feeling I think

[velociraptorsp.]

I think this is Dr.K's first sponsor. It is Interesting how Social anxiety comes from a learned behaviour.

[joanassm]

I'm 22 years old. All my life I thought that feeling anxious, sweating, shaking, feeling like I'm always being watched and judged in any social context was absolutely normal and everyone felt the same way. Two years ago, I found out social anxiety was a thing. I'm not normal yet, I still have social anxiety and most of the time I can't control it but understanding the process that my brain was going through every time I left the house, was a major step to be able to calm down and believe that, indeed, it was all in my head. And this video felt like a therapy session... Thank you :))

[Frege-]

As a 20 year old who was one year ahead all the way through middle and high school and was bullied for some years, I don't need to tell you how helpful this was...