Jordan Peterson - Should You Feel Good About Yourself?

Psychology professor Dr. Jordan B. Peterson criticizes the modern emphasize on 'self-esteem' of social phsychologists. The message should be more about living up to your potential, especially for young people.

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[bcnicholas]

I wish i had Jordan speaking to me in the back of my mind whenever I doubted myself

[NabsterHax]

Wish I'd heard this advice sooner. I am often haunted by feelings of regret, feelings that I could be better, annoyed and embarrassed that I've hidden away from things that a functioning adult really can't avoid. My psychologists told me it's okay, that I shouldn't beat myself up, that negative thoughts are part of my illness.

And while part of that is true, it's also enabled me to become stuck thinking that those negative thoughts don't have a damn good point. But they do, and they're telling me to get my shit together. Instead of burying my head and waiting for the guilt to end, I can challenge it. Prove it wrong. And for the first time in years I found out how to actually feel proud of something I'd done again.

It's true I originally fell off my horse because I was criticising myself too much. But instead of being encouraged to hop straight back on and be more careful, I was told it's safer not to try and that I should be content to never ride again. I don't want to be content. To quote my favourite film, it's time to "get busy living, or get busy dying." And after wasting all this time moping about, I most certainly plan to get some good life in.

[xapemanx]

I am slowly clawing my way out of this hole, 3cm progress 2cm sliding back. things are slowly getting better I know I can and I will overcome this

[bybyrei]

There is a difference between feeling good about yourself and feeling content about yourself and your situation. As Mr. Peterson said we should all appreciate ourselves, specially because of our potential. But obsessing with your potential could put too much pressure on your shoulders. It's all about balance.

[DREMzy]

Every time I hear Peterson speak, I feel I get grounded again to my goals. Not many people can do this for me.

[StringMaestro]

I feel like i learn something every minute i listen to him

[lisamarie]

3:55 - “Voluntary gradual exposure to what your afraid of is curative.”

[musicbymark]

It's a blurry (but significant) linguistic line between "confidence" and "esteem", and many use the terms interchangeably. Albert Ellis said what was important was "self-acceptance", not 'esteem'. I.e., accepting your current self (as you aspire to maximize your potential to the extent you choose to), but not needing to feel you're awesome, etc.

[GaganKPolska]

I love how Rogan let's Peterson take the stage with asking the right questions and giving the minimal input not trying to prove that he's equally smart. He listens, that's a sign of intelligence.

[musyclover]

Dr JP hits the nail on the head yet again

[llangelll]

Learn to acknowledge how far you've come in life, and credit yourself for all the hard work and success you've accumulated. But never forget your endless potential to keep pushing and improving yourself, and continue to learn and be humble. Don't just "accept yourself for who you are, " and don't just settle for mindless self-content. But also be careful you don't aim for perfection, because perfection is an ideal that no one can achieve. Aim for progress from who you were yesterday, and set realistic yet challenging goals for yourself so that every new year, you can look back at the year past and see how far you've come, again and again. That will help develop true self-esteem and confidence that can't be wavered easily.

[Blitzman]

Man! I needed this and it’s so inspiring and makes clear sense in my chaotic life. I’m so glad so many people are listening to him.

[Kat]

love yourself, but strive to be who you want to become

[villiestephanov]

I have been a prisoner of love since the day I was born.

[ion]

if youre 16-20 - all you've done so far is pretty much consume things and get educated (hopefully) and get a toehold in life. i think his point is that you really haven't contributed much (if anything) yet. There are a very few people who have actually contributed to their family/society in a meaningful way before 20, but it's not most of us. Before 20, your family and society has just been investing in you. Now, hopefully, its time to start paying that back. You probably haven't done a whole lot to feel good about besides being spoonfed ...

[aimoss]

I say: Be happy with your current situation always, but be content for the future. Never strive for perfection, simply strive to be better, because if you do one thing better each day then your brain will reward you with dopamine, but if you want to be perfect immediately, then well you're falling down a never ending tunnel.
The opposite to this is becoming narcissistic, being happy with everything that you are because you create delusions of grandiose. Perhaps the worst thing a person can do in terms of self image.

[malcolmdewey]

Self love is more important than self esteem.

[shaggyalonso]

This is why CBT didn’t do much for me. It’s basically trying to tell yourself that things are better than they are, it really is just a long winded way of saying “look on the bright side”. I can’t go along with that because I value truth above just about anything else, and if things are not good, I can’t pretend that they are. Maybe some people are so delusional that they can happily deceive themselves into believing whatever they want to believe.

[philosophaurus]

I think Joe is right. Confidence is important.
What they were talking about is the typical profile who drops education too soon, and keep themselves on a stupid step of step 1- feel good about yourself. Step 2- ... All what Peterson is sharing. But many people stop on step 1. Few continue their education further than just listening a couple of good advice.

[ChrishBlake]

Lol and you don’t hype the hero up telling him he can kill the dragon before he’s even seen it. The hero should go in the cave noble, but humble, not cocky. He knows he has the potential to do it, but he knows chaos unmapped has infinite potential. Therefore he must be forthright and truthful, disciplined and aware.