The Rise of Skywalker is TRASH of the highest order, STAR WARS full in-depth review

No spoilers in the first portion with heavy in-depth spoiler breakdown after where I list a depressing amount of the worst contrivances and plot holes.
My in depth review of STAR WARS the Rise of Skywalker.

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[bigbadseed]

My favorite part was when Rey sees the sith dagger and says, "This blade has done horrible things, " as she holds a lightsaber that was literally used to kill children.

[FyourCult]

The entire prequels were showing how secretive Palpatine was in planning and executing his plans. Then in Rise of Skywalker he posts his plans on his Twitter a day ahead

[ninjalionddhogan]

Darth Vader- dying
Luke- "father don't die pls"
Vader- "just force heal me ya dingus"
Luke- "oh yes"
And no more star wars movies were ever made!

[iminspain]

Rey: This dagger has done terrible things
*Proceeds to activate the youngling killer 9000*

[bestintheworld]

They need to make a Space Balls 2 parodying this movie, where Kylo force heals Rey and dies, then Rey force heals Kylo and dies, and they just go back and forth over and over.

[RawkLbster]

“Who are you”

“Rey”

“Rey who”

Rey looks to the distance to see Luke and Leia and the gives a little smirk on her face as she opens her mouth and says...

“Rey’d Shadow Legends. With over 16 million downloads, Raid shadow legends is free, turn based game with over 400 characters to collect. The devs add 16 champions each month and are constantly updating the game.”

[robrockstar]

I think Han summed this movie up pretty well.

THATS NOT HOW THE FORCE WORKS!

[chrisy]

I was genuinely so much more invested in this video than the entirety of the sequel trilogy

[joekerr]

Back when Ep. 7 was announced the meme was.

7. The force awakens
8. The force makes a cup of coffee
9. The force stares out the window and contemplates life.

Best prediction ever.

[thespanishinquisition]

Luke: wait. You were supposed to be dead!
Palpatine: don't know what you're talking about.
Vader: YOU EXPLODED!
Palpatine: I got better.

[keysliceace]

I hate how they turned palpatine from a genius who treats everything like a game of chess to an idiot

[billygray]

"Who are you?"
"I'm Rey."
"Rey who?"
Possible answers:
Rey Skywalker
Rey Palpatine
Just Rey
MaRey Suewalker
Reyturn of the Jedi
Reyvenge of the Sith
The Force Areykens
The Reyse of Skywalker
Knights of the old Reypublic
Darth Reyvan
Darth Reygueis the Wise
Darth Reyder
Kylo Reyn
Reybel alliance
Reysistance
The Knights of Reyn
MaRey Sue
PodReycer
MandaloReyan
Reyzor Crest
This is the Rey
Be careful not to choke on your aspiReytions
General GReyvous
Reycist
A Reypist
Rey Mysterio
Rey bans
Rey jeyjey
Rey Rey Reybrams
Reyan Johnson
Death Rey
Rey Shields
Reyd: Shadow Legends, a free-to-play online multiplayer game BLAH BLAH BLAH you know the rest

[AngelMartinez-cjsd]

Anakin is Feeling stupid for turning to the darkside after seing that jedi could heal and revive people all along lol

[superfire]

You forgot that Ray can drive a boat perfectly despite growing up on a desert planet

[mattvoelker]

This was basically a full win for Palpatine. The Solo's are dead, the Skywalkers are dead, and his granddaughter has stolen credit for the fall of the Empire.

[damashep]

Sequel Palpatine is the exact opposite of Prequel Palpatine. In the sequels he announces himself, leading to his eventual defeat. While prequel Palpatine was the master of hiding in plain sight. He didn't reveal himself till he was found out, but by then it was already too late to stop him and his plan.

[alexfelix]

They wanted to erase the prequels but ironically strengthened them

[konieczny]

Remember when Anakin turned to the dark side for ability to save people from death? Yea Rey can do it for no reason.

[conforzo]

*Prequel Palpatine* "Im gonna spend 3 movies hiding in plain sight and carefully plot my takeover"
*Sequel Palpatine* "IM ALIVE AND WILL KILL YOU ALL"

[gm]

"I am all the Overpowers."
Fires all powers

"I am all the plot armour."
Slaps on another layer of plot armour.