Childfree In My 30s - this is what they don’t tell you!

Buy my book OKAY DAYS:

I’m childfree, I’m in my 30s, these are some of the unexpected things they don’t tell you about choosing this lifestyle.

I talk about:
- why i’m childfree
- what my life looks like without children
- not deciding someone else's life
- my observer article
- holidays without children
- christmas without children
- focusing on projects
- why i feel younger
- less responsibilities

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fair use of copyrighted material:
disclaimer: i do not own some of the material in this video. please note that some images, videos, and copyrights belong to their original owners. no copyright infringement intended.

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[JennyMustard]

Thanks for watching everyone.
Why not pick up a copy of my debut novel OKAY DAYS, that has a childfree theme:

[olahanus]

For me, personally, the most difficult part of not having kids is maintaining friendships with people with kids. They are just constantly talking about them or not listening to me because they are thinking about them. I am just naturally surrounding myself with child-free people, but I am sad about those friendships that I lost..

[vitaactiva_official]

The best thing for me about not having children is the freedom to be ill and heal. I got huge respect for all these parents in the world who have headaches, influenza… and still care for someone else

[zitanemeckova]

I'm struggling with infertility and this gives me hope that life without kids is not end of the world but just a different path <3

[keepscats]

I had a tubal ligation at 22. That seems very young for such a major decision, but I knew myself. I'm 70 and have no regrets. People have said all sorts of things about me not having children. Some them were quite rude.

[yogawithkassandra]

You are me, I am you. I get this. Children are easy to romanticize! Christmas, birthdays, family dinners when the kids have grown up... sounds lovely! But it's a small piece of the puzzle. I know the day to day isn't for me.

[toneluy]

I'm 36 with no kids. The only drawback to me is that it seems hard to find a partner that also doesnt want kids. Other than that I'm very happy with my choice.

[elevenisonelouder]

I have two kids and genuinely enjoy them. I think there's nothing better than a trip to the zoo or playground with them. The saddest thing in the world are the parents who aren't enjoying their kids and are just counting down the days for them to grow up and leave the house. People should be opting in to having children, it shouldn't be any sort of a default. Every baby/child/teenager should be wanted and loved.

[lilyghassemzadeh]

My great aunt in law is 75, never married, no children. She says it just didn't happen and she has no regrets at all. I love her attitude and optimism.

[Rose_Ou]

I have never had maternal instinct but I did get pregnant and decided to give birth when I was 30. I love my son, I'd give my life to save his, but if I could turn back time I'd never ever do it again. My motherhood has been extremely lonely and traumatic because of my own unprocessed childhood traumas which motherhood very quickly exposed. I feel like I've been stuck/paralyzed/unable to take care of myself/completely not myself (if I met myself I wouldn't recognize me) and in a chronic depression for the past 17 years. My son was born with heart defect so all my attention and fears (!) focused on him. I stopped existing, my needs, my dreams, all gone. At 48 years old and him turning 18 next year I don't know who I am any more. I used to love life, I was always planning things, not any more. I suppose I'm also unemployable at this point so I feel like my life has ended. It takes so much effort for me to convince myself that I still have a chance to make things work when he graduates high school and starts university but it's like learning everything from scratch or waking up from a 17 year coma. I guess I'm just trying to warn women who feel like outcasts because they lack maternal instinct but decide, usually under pressure, to take this route. You will most likely regret it.

[Fruitbat]

I don’t see why it’s such an issue when women choose not to have kids. I did and have four gorgeous kids, and very happy with my choice. Happy for anyone else and their choice.

This is what women’s freedoms are about ~ we make our own choices.

Go Girls 🎉❤

[beSEAMAN]

I have a friend in her 80s who never had children, I asked if that was planned. Her response was "I was not blessed with children, but in many other ways" I think this is a great way to see our lives. I lam in my 30s childfree by choice and have left my home country to explore, that makes me happy, I have friends my age with children who are equally happy with their life choices. We're all here for a different purpose.

[squeezedamilo]

Truly, a happy childless woman lifestyle is something very underrepresented in society today. I am 31, currently single, childless, pay my own bills, live alone, have time for all the things that interest me, and live a fulfilled and happy life. But I don't see other women my age doing the same a lot. Almost everyone I know is in a permanent search, or married long time ago, or in a relationship with someone, and usually, these people look at me from the perspective of their (often very entangled and stressful) lives with condescending compassion, like, poor thing, it must be so hard for you to be alone... It's very weird. I wish I had more childfree women around me to be able to relate and share experiences.

[Es_Tay]

Growing up my biggest fear was getting pregnant, going through childbirth and raising a kid. I'm 30 now and it still feels so terrifying and alien to me. I didn't like children when I was a child, and I don't like them now. And kids don't like me, it's like they can tell. Animals however, I love them all, and they tend to love me, even random wild animals I can easily form a connection with. As much as I can easily connect with adults, small humans are just not my thing. I'll be the weird aunt who teaches them all the shit their parents won't when they're in their teens.

[yogasiostra]

It's great to know that I'm not the only person for whom having children seems unnatural. I cannot imagine myself as a mother, so I totally get your point of view 🙂

[kemsari]

I am 43 and a very happy childfree woman. I had a longlasting relationship for 20 years and in 2020 he broke up with me to be with another woman. I am so glad, that i never had any children with him. I am living my best life without him and any other men and without any children. I got a new job, i bought my own house together with my sister, she is also childfree, and we love together in it with our 7 dogs. Its THE BEST! I am a very introvert person. I love my alone time (reading, doing yoga, playing computer games, watching tv series or youtube), i love being on my own, eating what i want when i want to and only have to care for my dogs and our garden.

[hollamonE]

I am 46, and so grateful I don't have children. 100%, regrets. ❤️

[rastlinesofine]

I remember the feeling when I realized - having children is optional?! I didn't see it as a choice other than how many you want to have. When I realized it was a choice a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders. I love children and I love being an aunt, but I love having a choice of how much time that is and when. I love my creative work and my life so much, I really don't want it to change! I feel like having children would be just to satisfy the norms and expectations of others. I'm so happy that I realized that. Thank you for talking about it so freely! ❤

[FireSilver]

I’m 48 and CF. I feel like a dodged a nuclear warhead! I do enjoy kids (in small doses) but I never wanted to be a mother. I’m also an artist and gardener so I feel like I have a legacy and that I’m a creator.
I look and feel ten years younger. I have freedom and agency over my life. I get to sleep, cook whatever whenever, only clean up after myself, and have a social life.
It’s really awesome! We’ve been lied to all this time!!!! Being a spinster cat lady is delicious!
Only people who truly want, and can provide for, children should have them. They should be the ones who have to justify that, as kids deserve a loving stable environment. ❤

[katherinebaxter]

I’m 48 and child free by choice and have never regretted it. Children honestly overwhelm me. I love being able to move if and when I like, traveling when I want and eat when and what I want without worrying about the care of children. I like having the flexibility of being child free. I love being able to spend time on things I love. I have never wanted to have kids, hold kids, raise them, etc. There are so many beautiful types of love and children are their own people, they may never love their parents the way the parents hope. I have seen many struggle with that. Love is a choice.