My 19-Year-Old is Unmotivated, Should I Kick Him Out?

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[OzyMandias]

“It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.”

-Fredrick Douglass

[kennysiegler]

My worry is that an unmotivated teenager likely won't become motivated when you kick him out of the house. He just becomes a financially unstable unmotivated teenager. He needs guidance

[iaindennis]

At 19 I wasn’t ready for adulthood - thank God my parents were patient.

[MoonMoon-fxop]

There's a difference between a 19 year old who is working to save up and a 19 year old who is working without any plans and blowing their money.

[everydayedgar]

I never understood why so many Americans want to kick out their kids so quickly. I’m Mexican and we tend to live with our parents until we get married/find a long term partner. I didn’t move out until I was 25 and never felt any pressure to do so. I was exactly the same at 19 but now I own two homes at 30.

[twinny]

I was told I was ‘unmotivated’ until I was 28 and then I got an ADHD diagnosis. Now I have a first class honours degree and a masters with distinction in construction and property development. As soon as I got the help I needed and was able to understand my own behaviour I managed to pull myself up. I’m not saying this kid has a learning disability, maybe he does maybe he doesn’t, but unmotivated people often have issues like this or mental health issues they need to address.

[Hagg]

Easy to blame the teenager. Parents take responsibility for not teaching him to save money and be responsible from a young age.

[theplaintiff]

behind every spoiled child, there is a parent that enabled the behavior.

[liambruhz]

I had a friend like this. He was sitting at home playing online poker all day. His Dad marched him down to the military recruiter and he joined the Army. It helped him on his way, but it destroyed his relationship with his Dad.

[saber]

Feels like dave cares more about the situation than the parent does 😂

[universalservicetechust]

At 19 I was lost not knowing what to do, thank God I have two older brothers that lived in Dallas and invited me to come stay with them and helped me out, today I’m self employed and loving life, TYJ 🙏🏼💯

[ehamilful]

Motivation doesn’t get better with the feeling of rejection from your parents. If you’re tossed out like trash, you feel like you deserve to be treated like trash.

[besweeeet]

A good question would've been: "What have you tried?"

[daitrong]

He is freaking 19 years old. Sometimes people need a couple more years of guidance to figure things out. You kick the kid out, good luck having him go to you if he ever have any problems out on his own. I was a total f*ck up until I turned 21. Almost failed high school. Now, I make 250k a year. My parents never kicked me out. They always encouraged me to do better.

[lkjg]

The great irony? Thirty years from now, her son will look back on his times living with his five friends in a cramped apartment in the bad section of town as the best time of his

[worldwide_wes]

Sounds like every 19 year old to me lol. Mom is expecting him to be 30 already.

[yawboateng-ycwu]

19 years! Show me a 19 year old who has it all figured out and I will show you I will show you 100 who are like this young man. Please Candace, give the young man more time and grace.

[finnfox]

I wasn’t ready at 19 for adulting. Even college for that matter… i had no drive. Couldn’t see the path it would lay for me.
Attempted to live off min wage and quickly realized it’s not possible. My mother never kicked me out. Joined the Army at 23 and came out as a grown man who knows how to work hard and prioritize wants vs needs.

[e]

Our entire American culture needs to change on how we raise our children. I lost count of the number of children that told me they never had any chores, never paid for anything themselves, or be punished for poor behavior.

[AkashLankala]

What does family even mean anymore? My mom always warned me that other families typically kick their kids out at 18 and used that as my fear for them supporting me until my 20s and making sure I study hard and do well in college.