When Your Grown Child Is Disrespectful | Try 3 Powerful Responses

Are you aggravated when your grown child is disrespectful? Try 3 powerful responses that can help you to immediately apply for a better outcome with your grown child.

00:00 Intro & Summary
00:29 How To Decipher Between The Flight Or Fight Response
02:07 What Is The Power Of The Pause Button
03:31 Why You Should Consider An Apology
05:33 How To Listen To Understand

Watch and Enjoy!
Dr. Paul Jenkins

WHAT TO WATCH NEXT
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3 Big Skills Every Parent Of A Young Adult Must Know And Master

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[davedabuckman]

My son will be 25 years old next month. I have finally concluded my son is a bully and has no intention on changing. I have ceased all communication with him. I plan to focus on myself and let life teach him.

[mweber]

If your adult child is having you constantly apologize to them… That is emotional abuse

[daphenernorwood]

I financially support my daughter and her 3 children. I do it for my grandchildren and I’m not wealthy. However, I’m at the end of my rope. My daughter is so verbally abusive and disrespectful I’m ready to walk away from the relationship completely. I have prayed and given all I have to give.

[deliadee]

Im done apologizing!! I don’t need to back off. She needs to respect me PERIOD!! I will not be a doormat!! I’m the parent regardless of how old they are!! I raised all 3 of them by myself. If they can’t respect that I laid down my life for them then…..I’m not doing it! I’m tired of walking on eggshells never knowing if what I say is going to trigger her!

[ladysmith]

I have tried many approaches. My preferred approach is to remain silent then remove myself from the situation as soon as possible. At this point when someone disrespects me I feel that they don`t value the relationship so I terminate it or distance myself.

[esoessos]

Apologizing to them causes narcissistic, entitled people stomp you harder.

[reginadesapiresbotas]

Doesn't work with my son. If I apologise he looks at it as a weakness and becomes even more abusive.

[rr]

I’ve apologized to my son for whatever he thought I said or did, and here’s the deal. He was NEVER abused, he was loved and cared for. We paid for summer camp, swim lessons and cheered him at his football games. We didn’t drink smoke or take drugs. He has PTSD from a very abusive marriage, and has made us his punching bag. I’m DONE being abused by him.

[OK-ejfc]

My daughter has been so consistently hateful to me that I have had to pretty much completely disengage — meaning, I do not interact with her unless it is about my grandson. It’s sad that it’s come to this, but I cannot continue to subject myself to her verbally abusive tendencies.

[TheWorld-xsly]

I’m so glad I came here. My 38 year old daughter is a successful business woman and I notice that the more successful she becomes, the more arrogant she becomes. Yesterday, she told me I’m not on her level regarding business so basically, I need to shut up. We haven’t spoke since. I feel guilty, sad, depressed, etc. Just for the record, my daughter was never abused or neglected. She was in private school until Jr. High and have a relationship with me and her dad (we’re divorced). Please pray for us

[glamgalnorth]

When I’m constantly being disrespected by my adult child who talks down to me and flies off the handle about small things that I say, I’m not going to apologize to her. She will just completely walk all over me if I do that. I think the problem is that she hates her life

[Thetitschamnel]

I think apologizing for something you didnt do wont happen. Soft parenting got me in this spot. It took a therapist to help me identify i was being abused by my kids!

[sharonmohon]

Apologizing for something you have not done Is ridiculous ….all children today only think about themselves and their lives…a parent has born these children, clothed them, loved them, sacrificed for them, worried about them, and supported them to adulthood not only emotionally but financially. If a parent says what the adult children are doing that I don’t agree with and that causes them to terminate our relationship, then so be it. I have no regrets.

[kjonesnewyork]

Leave them alone and live your life! Until they see that their lack of self control towards a parent is wrong they will wreak havoc in your life as an adult who has less time to live. I am speaking only to parents who have not abandoned or actually harmed their kids. Some parents have traumatized their adult kids… if you have been a relatively good parent and keep getting kicked in your butt by your out of control adult kids.. I’m cautiously open to a better relationship but I’m putting me first from now on.

[Oldmanflyfishing]

I told my 28 year old son, that if he continues to call
me stupid, idiot, homer moron, I will drive to his house and put my foot through his mouth. Social media has made it all to easy for todays kids, (he’s not a kid) to be disrespectful and not get a punch in the mouth for it. I think a lesson needs to be taught here.

[bellabong]

OK. Let me review:
1. APOLOGIZE: "Dear (42-yr-old) daughter, I apologize for deciding to help you out, when you had nowhere else to go, with a furnished room of your own, free rent, free food, free utilities, free toiletries, free use of my washer/dryer and detergent, free maid service (since you claim to have neck pain), free toiletries, free paper towels, free Kleenex, free toilet paper, use of my clothes (even my underwear, sleepwear and socks), free wifi and smart TV entertainment, and on and
2.

I

2. INSTEAD SAY: "I love you, darling, but you have 30 days to either start contributing some money for rent, utilities and groceries, start cooking for yourself, help out with housework, not let another disrespectful word pass out of your lips towards me, take responsibility for yourself OR move out. And take all your stuff I've been storing for you the past 10 years in my garage with you."

3. APOLOGIZE TO MYSELF: Dear Self, I apologize for being Bobo the Fool, being a weak parent afraid of what would become of your adult child without your diaper-changing, I mean help. Pease remember to change the locks today."

[nightstand]

I apologized . I’ve taken the high road . They just get more hateful and controlling.

[judyb]

Adult children who disrespect you or interrupt you is the worst. They feel so entitled and more intelligent than their parents.

[lindablackmore]

I'm so fed up regarding my 35 year old daughter. Nothing and I mean nothing makes her happy! I've tried and tried! When my parents passed away, I off her debts and helped her beyond measure. Yup, it helped but time flew and she started to still be disrespectful, and it was an act. I've houses at, babysat, and pet sat and her and my son in law are both rude and arrogant!! We had a fight, she blocked me. So I washed my hands. Sick of walking on eggshells and kissing her ass! I never disrespected my parents. I took care of them in their last 18 years on this Earth and honoured them. I raised my daughter and two son's with mistakes, and apologized for it but was NEVER abusive. I'm not putting up with her crap! I love my grandbabies and will miss them but to be honest, the way she's raising those 3, she's putting a rod in her own back. Good luck to her and shame on her for using me. Again!

[glowgirl]

I made a heartfelt apology to my grown daughter for something I did years ago that was plain wrong. Won't go into it here. My daughter took it as a sign of weakness and homed in on my guilt. She has never let up and it's impossible to be around her for any length of time. This has been going on for years. I know one thing and that is I meant a lot more to her when I had more money. She sure didn't slam me then.

Edie: A year later ---after reading comments I need to amend my post. I did NOT do anything in any physical way, to my daughter. What happened is I was arrested 24 years ago on a drug charge and that is what hurt her.