Why and how you sabotage love (+how to stop)

Disclaimers:

This channel is for informational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing on this channel is intended to substitute therapy.

The thoughts expressed in videos are my own personal opinion and do not reflect the opinion of any institution I am involved with.

My videos are general and not specific to your unique case.

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Time Stamps:
0:00 Intro
2:27 Why we sabotage love
7:21 How we sabotage love
10:10 How to stop sabotaging

[gatsbyspet]

When I’m alone I crave emotional and physical bond, but the moment I actually start talking to someone I completly freeze and then try to run away as fast as possible. Why are we our own worst enemy?😩

[TheEverGrowingRosey-]

I’ve noticed I’ve sabotaged friendships, from feeling like I was being abandoned & that became a self fulfilling prophecy.

[anonymous-zoqh]

it's tough to realize that you are sabotaging yourself and your partner, while thinking that you are putting a lot of effort into the relationship
fun stuff

[grace.flores]

Thank you for this!!! He literally just broke up w me but that’s bc I worked so hard to ruin the relationship just to confirm my insecurities. :(

[ameliarodriguez-pyjg]

I sabotaged my last relationship. Almost everyday I got upset at whatever he did and I realized now it's because I haven't healed. He was a great man I can admit that; quite understanding, responsible, mature literally ticked all the boxes. He grew up around healthy marriages where if there was a problem they would communicate while in my family there would be arguments and fights everyday. I was told to talk to a therapist and I tried 2 but they haven't helped one bit. I still hope we rekindle in the future

[rhonnieminnie]

my ex self sabotaged a very healthy supportive relationship. his past relationship was extremely toxic, so i feel like he tried to "overcorrect" by leaving me so he could justify that he does have the capacity to leave a "bad relationship"...except, he ended a good relationship in a bad way.

[meagles]

"gaze at reality, even if it isnt what you want to see" solid advice

[bianca]

This brings so much regret. Hopefully we can all heal from this nightmare roller coast. ❤

[riccardodelloste]

Self-sabotage is so harmful I can't even tell. I feel that in my case there is a fear of abandonment at the base for that. At least, that is what came out from my therapist. The thing that surprises me the most is that, apparently, I tend to self-sabotage potential relationships before they even turn romantic. Probably for fear of rejection and for fear of being vulnerable. I am not even sure whether that is a thing that has ever been researched

It was an interesting topic! Your videos keep helping me in this journey of self-development. You are amazing! <3

[combobreaker]

My ex-fiancée of 4 years would tell me they wanted quality time, then when I made plans or hung out with them they were always on their phone. They never really wanted the quality time, and self sabotaged the relationship. No amount of gifts, touch, words of affirmation (would say I said I love you too much and she felt pressured to say it back, weird behavior), acts of service, etc were never good enough for her.

I ended it because it was getting to the point where my own sanity was starting to unwind. They can figure it out and sort through their own issues, but it deeply pains me knowing how much I still love them.

[Victa]

I never get past the talking stage, i knew I was the main cause of it but didn't quite understand why I do the things I do or how to stop

[mariaeugenius]

Yasss about to watch this while I work, love ur vids Ana ♥

[kellyjelly]

I've done this a couple times until I worked on myself, then I met a man who did this to me and it is painful to experience, and very frustrating. But you can't force someone to see their worth or get help

[hammerbro]

this is the most helpful thing i’ve ever watched

[WorldofAlexia]

yayy Ana 🇷🇴 so happy to be one of the first to watch! Love your content

[cheickonate]

thank u so much!!!! you deserve billions of views
your videos can save lives 💗💓💞💕

[Ryan-jqov]

Acceptance (number 5 in the video) for me and maybe for some others reading is we have to accept our partners expression of love even though we don't see it in ourselves or we feel we don't deserve it. People will love us for reasons we will never understand and have to accept and trust the feelings our partners have are genuine in order to continue and maintain a healthy relationship without self sabotaging. I pray to whoever is watching this video and myself that we will find a partner that makes us feel safe, secure, and loved.

[annie]

An incredibly enlightening video, thank you!

[musklemon]

I watch your videos all the time, they are so informative and calming at the same time, I have always thought psychology would be interesting if ever I started reading about it, but your channel is so perfect to learn. Thanks a lot Ana! Please keep uploading your research and everything like you already do

[rcz]

You are wise beyond your years, thank you so much for making these kind of videos.