How To Win With People You Don't Like - Jocko Willink

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Excerpt from JOCKOPODCAST 131

[MrPickle]

"If I'm so smart, why am I losing?"
Amazing way to check your own ego and get the hell out of your own way.

[akrafty]

Building a relationship and working with someone you don’t like to achieve a mission. That’s professionalism. That’s how you win.

[theownersmanual]

I've learned from listening to Jocko and applying his wisdom that the phrase "how can I help?" solves almost any conflict. Nothing disarms an adversary and puts my own ego in check like sincerely, humbly trying to help the person my ego views as a threat.

If I can hold back my emotions and reactions (unattaching) long enough to think rationally, I can turn almost any situation into a positive learning experience (for all involved parties).

In religion, politics, business, and interpersonal relationships, the ability to distinguish between literal threats and "non-factors" are the key to the success of your agenda. Thanks for the awesome info as always!!

[nickp]

“You’re damn right I’m hostile towards people that aren’t squared away”

I died

[evanpoole]

I have a boss I am forced to see first thing in morning and one thing ive realized is if you just treat them with kindness and don’t expect anything back from them.... you will win every single time because even when you just say good morning and they don’t respond... they think they are insulting you with not responding but if you know better and understand that them not responding is due to their own unhappiness then them not responding is you WINNING lol

[Anykindahandle]

I love how jocko admits his mistakes as a young man. Trying to be tough... I’m 31 realizing how stupid I’ve been but, I learn from my mistakes and trying to be a better man everyday.

[sililly]

P/S, I was pleasantly surprised last week to find out that my teenage daughter listens to your podcasts. This is how I found out: I started playing one of your clips and she was in the room. She said, "Hey mom - is that the Navy Seal guy's podcast? You know him too 😲?"

So you guys should know your reaching out to multiple generations and effectively changing lives for better!!!! Thank you for all you do.

[jasongravely]

“If I’m so smart, why can’t I influence this person.”

Simple yet true. I’m in sales and that’s been a hang up of mine recently. It’s my fault.

[willliv]

This really hit home...I've always thought I was humble but deep down I'm too conceited...I'm gonna work on it from here on out

[muttenmong]

One of my instructors when I was in class to become a towercrane driver told me " you can be the best operator in the crane but if you do not know how to handle your ground crew or the people you serve, you will suck and not have a long career up there ". or you can mess up many times but if your crew loves you, you will be a legend "
I have never forgotten those words because that was a golden. To this day I still hear him yelling through my radio " NO MERCY FOR YOU DANNY BOY "
My first try in a new company and 5 days later I had the job and best crew ever. Know how to handle your people.

[PedroApp]

This is work 101, there is always someone you like less. After a while you just manage to ignore that fact, you are at work to get it done, friends are a bonus.

[andreeadobre]

"That sounds manipulative, conniving, not keeping it real" - Being autistic, to me even keeping it real is a sort of act that I learned to perform, so in a way I learned to view all behaviour as manipulative or somewhat acted. What matters is the intention, and when the intention is to get shit done, being cooperative and respectful to someone you despise is 100% true to the intention to get shit done. Maybe not true to your feelings but the point was to get shit done not to express your feelings.

[douchebag]

I watch this everyday before work. I’ve been promoted twice since I started. The one I didn’t like now works underneath me. I am still not finished. Still have a mission that needs to be completed. Thanks for your inspiration.

[wholeass]

I love how you guys can be humble and tough at the same time. Too many tough guys out there need to humble themselves

[PracticalInspiration]

Love the humility that Jocko shows in his response here. Really says a lot about the character of a man to acknowledge his weaknesses.

[Juznik]

"Being humble goes a loooong way" - Only being 30 years old and I've realized this. Being honest about your mistakes and showing how you can improve them combined with being humble about your skills and limitations will ease most tensions. I've been to meetings where the room was electrified coming in. But being just 1 person in there to stay the course of the objective helped so much in rebuilding a bit of trust and removing tensions for further development

[tia]

Jocko often looks like a little boy with a big secret he can't wait to tell his best friend :)

[mathieuveillette]

So many people get in their own way at work by thinking that reacting emotionally and bitching at everyone and everything means that they are genuine and have integrity. This should be mandatory viewing. At work, integrity means working together and I don’t care who you like or don’t like.

[hanschecker]

'' If I am so smart, why am I not winning? ''
That kinda got through me because I sabotage myself pretty often just out of pride and stubbornness, although I know Im consciously deciding to lose as long as I feel I am right.
So my principles are more important for me than to succed in certain situations, which leads to a lot of unhappiness obviously and I feel like I should change that behavior.
Well thanks for the great content!

[PatheticMillennial]

Rule number 1, never outshine the master