Can Separation Save my Relationship ? | Dr. David Hawkins

Today Dr. Hawkins tackles the controversial topic of separation. Most people will tell you that separation will only lead to divorce, and understandably, the people we work with also have a lot of doubts, fears, cynicism and skepticism towards the idea of separation. In this video, Dr. Hawkins talks about why he sees separation as an opportunity to end the insanity. It’s not a black and white, one size fits all solution - it’s certainly not for everyone, but when done well and under the guidance of an experience professional, a therapeutic separation is often the only way to end the madness and create space to think clearly about where you want this relationship to go and how you will get there. Find out what a therapeutic separation is, and how to do it so it can lead to eventual reconciliation and not divorce.

Dr. Hawkins and his team of experts offer education and professional training as well as treatment for narcissistic and emotional abuse.

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About

The internet is inundated with hyperbole and misinformation about narcissism, leaving many people confused and hopeless. Get the facts about narcissism and emotional abuse from someone who has been researching, writing about and treating narcissism and emotional abuse for over a decade.

Dr. Hawkins is a best-selling author and clinical psychologist with over three decades of experience helping people break unhealthy patterns and build healthier relationships. He is the founder and director of the Marriage Recovery Center and the Emotional Abuse Institute which offers education, training and counseling for people who want to break free of, and heal from, emotional abuse.

Whether the perpetrator of the abuse is your spouse, partner, parent, boss, friend or family member, we offer practical advice for anyone trapped in a toxic, destructive relationship. In addition to narcissism & emotional abuse, topics include covert, reactive, spiritual, secondary, relationship trauma and more.

#separation #relationship #relationshipadvice

[thesubtlebodies]

Thank you for this. Right now, I have been pushed into separation because of my mental health issues. And right now, all that I feel is I do not want to get back with my husband. But hope to get healed and calm down during the separation process.

[douillette]

Wife (32) & I (34) have been married 6yrs and together 12 in total. No abuse or cheating that I am aware of. She adopted my daughter in 2020. And we hit a rough patch in Feb and tried therapy and she disliked the marriage counselor and ended it. Things got slightly but then up and down in what she wanted to do. So she decided just doing a physical separation (moved out last month) was best for now. No legal or paperwork has been done and we only see our own individual therapist. I’m want to work on things and move forward but just don’t know what to do. I made sure we only keep our communication about our daughter (14) now and just let her initiate other subjects so I can give her space. She has talked about random stuff but things are just weird now. Idk what to do but I’m sad and worried she will grow apart.

[brightpage]

It doesn’t have to lead to divorce. It can be whatever we decide we want it to be. Maybe I want it because familiarity breeds contempt and I’d rather rest, relax, regroup energized and hungry for him again or more confident in myself, more competence. Without his monitoring my self efficacy. Maybe I need some space to get my head together about who I want to be and how to get in alignment with that before meeting tests like this relationship or relationships in general. Now that I’ve had some children and find myself a complete schlep of a human being instead of the productive citizen I always envisioned myself to be. I mean, my body is way different, my mind has gone off the rails and I let go of managing my ADHD when I let go of employ to make room for my children and managing their needs. Now they need me a little less and I can’t gain back the ol’ steam about life but I want to. The heart is willing but the body is weak. Enthusiasm and excitement only carry me so far. My brain gets distracted by somebody’s need, those become lists and week later literally I come back to my homework like “what happened to me? Where have I been? What have I lost? Is it even worth it or is this effort, expense, and investment just another scam I’m running - on myself?! How do I get out of this. My own body? How do I manage cope or deal with it all at the same time? While still meeting the needs instead of dropping all the balls from the air and giving up? I don’t have that luxury. These people I love are depending on me. I’d rather make them feel proud and helpful and support each other better. Oh Lord help me help my family more. Better. Give me the strength to become the structure they need. Thank you.” 🙏 😭

[evangel]

Curious what your explanation from a biblical point of view would be for this process?