Gaslighting and Reactive Abuse

#mentalhealth #stephanielyncoaching #narcissisticabuse #emotionalabuse #selflove

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Thank you for your love and support!
Stephanie

[TheJoshGalt]

2020. Quit my 300k job, started my own business, divorced my covert narcissist ex-wife, rebuilt the relationships with my kids, friends and family. The greatest year of my life 🥰🥰🥰😊😊😊

[BCHODOSH]

Abusive people are so manipulative! They need to get a reaction from you to make you be the unstable one, when actually they are unstable. They feel so bad about themselves, they are broken, and in order to feel better they need to control you by baiting you to react to their defense mechanisms. Then you become the bad guy and that gives them the control, and frees them from the fear and insecurities they have and can't control. Behavior like that screws with your mind, and eventually your relationship with them. Thanks Stephanie for your insight and help.See you next week. Be well.

[marycallan]

If you don’t like something, take away it’s only power. Your attention.

[samanthal]

“They are banking on you to react” truer words have never been spoken. Don’t continue to give them what they want.

[brettanderson]

Remember to breathe and maintain your own calm and steady frame of mind

Confidence is quiet, insecuties are loud

[NFSMAN]

This is how i am with my parents. Sometimes i can be reactive when im belittled and yelled at. It took me 24 years to realize that im not crazy or insane, my parents were emotionally abusive and unsupportive of me. Thank you for this video Stephanie. Im distancing myself from them emotionally and trying to save enough money to move out.

[maddyG]

For me, my reactivity always follows being gaslit. Because I have experienced gaslighting throughout my life from my close family and certain relationships. If someone basically denies my reality and doesn’t take any accountability for their role in something after I have, I go into fight or flight and I sometimes don’t act the way I would like to. It becomes more about me trying to establish that I’m right Vs being empathetic.

[kopipeko]

I caught myself recognizing these toxic people and I’m practicing not to mirror them emotionally, but by labeling it as “reactive abuse” I feel better because now I know that the abuser wants me to think I’m the problem when I’m not, even if they don’t realize that they’re being abusive... thanks for the video 🙏🙏

[BlueButterfly-mwld]

I have done reactive abuse and have felt terrible and guilty about it for a while now. Thank you for this video. I was appalled at my behavior and this helps me to forgive myself.

[vernita]

"Disengage and do things the right way..." THANK

[skbains]

I have found that not taking things personally is a huge golden nugget. I have learned the way people act the way they do is because they are not healthy. Creating a bubble is so important. I stopped engaging with my ex when I became healthier and could see he had a lot of childhood baggage. He just repeated the patterns of behaviour he grew up with. Gosh, it was so toxic yet I stayed longer than I needed to. I wasn’t getting much in return but abuse and control. When I finally reached an emotional pain threshold I cut myself free. ☮️ and ❤️ to everyone who has managed to do the same. Just breathe now...

[jkym]

Navigating dealing with the narc is exhausting

[KatFisch]

Reactive abuse is a huge problem I have because of CPTSD; I've been in therapy for two years and YOU CAN GET BETTER. you can become less reactive through introspection and learning healthy coping strategies

[nanat]

I’m still struggling after months of reactive abuse ... still feeling like, I shouldn’t have reacted. Should have sucked it all up in and left, but I couldn’t. Was gaslighted, badly.

[j_mae]

Not recognizing yourself in these reactions is the red flag for me. I just ended a 2 year relationship of broken promises and gaslighting. I reacted and we broke up. He called me crazy, I wasn't crazy. I was being emotionally controlled, manipulated, and abused. I had a similar relationship with my parents and cut them off years ago. I recognized about 2 months into the relationship when my feeling and conversations were ignored, but I was determined to make the relationship work. I tried talking about things that bothered me, but it ws always a dead end. I had so much anxiety I wanted to crawl into a ball and die. I'm working through this and this video helps. Thank you!

[marybethmarlar]

My current boyfriend gets me to react to his abuse and gaslighting and then records me while I react. He’s a nut job

[elaineeselun]

Okay this is wild! I never knew that they were finding "proof" and actually justifying their own abuse - that they started. Thanks for this!

[carlbowles]

You are right, being aware and having the right tools makes life easier. No one deserves the evil and dysfunction of others.

[sanjeevbains]

I have learned how to really slow myself down in order to stay in control of my emotions. Abusers really do crumble when you stay in your own lane of being grounded, calm and collected. Ultimately your energy is so much higher than theirs that they no longer feel comfortable being around you.

[yesreneau]

She is so cool, calm, and collected.