The Truth Behind Your Fear Of Public Speaking | Mel Robbins

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There's a ton of research that estimates 75% of people share the phobia known as glossophobia; more commonly known as the fear of public speaking.

As one of the busiest public speakers in the world, I have learned that when someone says they're afraid of being in front of people and telling their truth, there's usually something much deeper going on.

Not everyone is dealing with the same story you'll see in this video, but when I pulled a woman up on stage with me whose biggest fear is standing up in front of a crowded room, you'll learn that it isn't the speaking that's holding her back.

Watch this entire video, because what starts as a conquering someone's biggest fear ends with learning how to reframe and label our pasts so they no longer have power over our dreams.

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[happydayz]

Frankly, the saying ‘who are you to judge me’ has applied to my public speaking. Fear is rooted in being judged while you’re speaking. As you age, you come to quickly realize that most people are in no position to judge! They’re no one to be giving advice either. Your crowd is full of people with addictions, failed relationships, bad attitudes, dysfunctional and abusive relationships. Turns out, they may not be as smart as you are either. You may be the subject matter expert on the subject you’re speaking about. They may just like you and your sense of wit if you inject humor into your speech. They may be thinking about what to pick up from the store for dinner tonight. We’re all human here. Show your sense of humor, be casual when you speak. Audience members, give the speaker a break, be positive, and realize you have issues you could be harshly judged for too so keep your judgements to yourself.

[onioneyes]

I became quiet in fear of being ridiculed when i was a kid... Because i was ridiculed many times... This is so emotional... But thanks to myself and Mel + plus other youtube gurus, I'm on the path of a healthy mentality 🙏

[ikexrt]

Negetive self talk is what holds the genius in us back

[hanna]

This made me cry 💗
Only who pass through this know how means to overcome this fear

[busymama]

Wow, did this hit home for me! Moved to tears, but this 10 minute wake up call is just what I needed to hear. I too, get panic attack level nervous in front of people, out of fear of not being seen as good enough or smart enough. Going back to when I was little, we moved somewhere where I did not speak or understand the language, so I retreated and spent time alone while all the other kids whispered and laughed at me as they stared at me. I’m pretty sure this helped form the current fear I have of other people looking at me or of being the center of attention, and being completely paralyzed in front of a crowd and not being able to find the words, because in my mind I am 6 years old all over again on the playground surrounded by ridicule and prying eyes. I guess I need to remind myself I am not 6 years old anymore, this is not the playground, I am too smart enough to say something, 5-4-3-2-1 and just do the damn thing! Thank you Mel! ❤️😊

[ninad.]

I suffer from glossophobia. Presentations and other public speaking events rock me to the core. Walking up to the podium, my legs feel like a ton of bricks. My body and voice shake and tremble. I'm sweating profusely, the only thing I can hear is my heart beat. One time my sight left me, I just stood there in front of the crowd until it came back. I was so embarrassed and humiliated. I cried myself to sleep.

[isolditaa]

This was right on the spot! I have the same exact problem. I stop myself from speaking up in fear of not being good enough or smart enough. Being the youngest in the family my siblings used to quiet me or make me feel like I was small and stupid. So without knowing it I got quiet and it has always bothered me to be the quiet one in a group of people but I just can't find my words and when I try I just stumble on them. I remember being ten and thinking I had a problem because I wasn't able to speak in public. Every presentation in school was a nightmare, I could dread it for weeks, just knowing I had to stand in front of the whole class with all eyes on me. I'm almost 30 years now and I still find it difficult to speak at family dinners. When someone ask me a question trying to include me, I just feel awkward and give them a short answer. I can relate so bad to this video and I love how effortless you make your point. Your videos has helped me on a path of personal growth.

[MAMP]

I love that girl with the microphone. Got me to cry instantly when she stood up.

[kalpanamanoharan]

No words to express how much deep information this video has.... awesome!

[xtreme]

I needed to hear this. I’m about to embark in a new journey in my professional life that involves public speaking. English is my second language and this factor makes it even more challenging for me. I used to love public speaking (in my language-Spanish) and really want to regain my confidence.

Thank you for sharing your knowledge.
I just subscribed to the channel.

[jp]

I love this! I still fear public speaking up to now. It’ll probably be a while until I’m comfortable. I realized that my thoughts of people possibly judging me is mostly just judging themselves. Now I make it a point every time as much as I still struggle to speak in front of a group is to always volunteer myself to go first and get it over with. That way any judgement towards me that I feel will be very minimal compared to every other person of waits their turn.

[kimberlycopple]

Thank you Mel for speaking out your "personal Pep talks", they have been helping me (along with my coach) to get out of my head and get into the game. I was married for 20 years and have now been divorced for 7. It was an unhealthy marriage and yes it took some time for me to realize that and get away. He words were not nice and I have been working on getting out of my head the things he would say to me that were not true, but hearing them over and over for years made it believable (at the time), to be honest it was when my son came to me one day and said to me "dad needs to apologize to you for what he said" that was when I said I am done and asked for a divorce. Best words for me to hear from my son. Now the blessing of getting out of my head and getting out of my way so that I can build my business and become a great speaker, a great leader for my team. Your "personal pep talks" are very helpful! Thank you for being YOU!! HUGS!!

[LonjeMarie]

I love Mel, she gave me the courage to go on stage to do stand up. The five second rule! I took her course, I’m preparing to be a public speaker! I know it’s my gift!

[keplynrobinson]

Love you Mel! This resonates so much to me! My mom was forever telling me to not look so boyish/butch. I’m female but masculine and tried to change myself my whole life. Now at 44 I’m finally letting go and being myself and i still hear her daily. Words are more painful than anything!

[osalinas]

Thank you Mel for these videos! I really appreciate you taking the time for us!

[hewhohasbeenforgiven]

It's incredible how we can sabotage our self psychologically

[hellopeople]

I have a huge problem with speaking in public places. Whenever i have to speak in class, I can feel my heartbeats go crazy and can hear my voice and body shaking. Or when i have to do a presentation, my face gets completely red and I feel like i will fall and I completely forget what I want to say. I don't have the courage to say what I want whenever in class or in a group of friends. And I can't change. I have tried lots of times and the only thing I can do is just cry my self every night...

[anamcconnell]

I am actually crying because you hit the nail on the head. I had a very abusive mother and feel I am just starting to deal with it at 55.

[EdnaDomingues]

I love it so much! I’ve been raised in a toxic environment as well and my opinion, wants and needs were always neglected. Now a days I face a lot of problems with myself like lack of self steam and public speaking as well. This video is a life saver! Thank you Mel! ❤

[ClairePenettiere]

This was one of the best motivational and inspiring videos on youtube. Thank you for everything you do, the analysis was mind-blowing. Never thought about social media commenting like that. It really explains a lot of the hate talk also. Love your work and thank you for the love you're giving. Now 1 2 3 4 5 off I go to study 😘