Eating and Dying, End of life Hospice Care

Have you experienced this? Eating at the End of Life is a conversation need to have!

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When dealing with any medically related events or medical emergencies, please communicate with your primary health care provider.

#hospice #glioblastoma #hospicenursejulie

[rdangell]

My husband passed a month ago. About 40 minutes before he passed he asked and got a spring roll with peanut sauce. He commented that the shrimp and avocado tasted good. Soon after he fell asleep and passed.

[blipblip]

My 99 year old mom died a couple days ago. It was a slow decline form not wanting a lot of food, to only wanting to eat snacks, to wanting to be fed, to holding her food in her mouth, but mostly, at the very end, her body/brain forgot how to swallow-a common end stage sign of dementia. We would never put her though the torture of food tubes, so we visited with her, talked with her-though she was mostly not responding, said our "love-yous" to each other, and she died a few days later. Morphine and other main meds helped her though her congestive heart failure. She was a beloved mother and a hole in our hearts is there for a long time.

[YcatsMartinez]

I remember my Dad’s hospice nurse watching me cry when my Dad wouldn’t eat. After she finished with the patient she was working with, she came over to me, put her arm around me, and told me exactly what you just said. It was sad, but comforting. It was nice to have someone so knowledgeable about the process there to help me navigate it. I’ll never forget you, Courtney. ❤️

[MesmerEyes]

My brother loved bacon but he was not supposed to have it to eat. Last year when he was in a hospice house, I had a BLT. I left half of it for later. My brother had been sleeping and he had two friends come to see him. I stepped out of the room to get him something to drink and when I came back, he had woke up and his two friends were feeding him the bacon off of my sandwich. He was enjoying it so much. He made sounds while chewing. Less than 12 hours later, he transitioned. I think it was fitting that his last meal was my sandwich. Let them have what they want but don't force feed them.

[vickiepatterson]

My sister and I had taken our mother to the doctor two weeks before she passed.
The doctor told us to have mom finish a medication then nature would take over.
I tried Jello or pudding after a while and she would try a few bites. Mom slowly stopped eating and drinking. We could tell she was slipping away.
At the end of the two weeks, she just went to sleep. She had battled cancer for two years and was finally out of pain.
You always wonder if you're doing enough when taking care of a loved one when they're dying.
The doctor knew exactly when she would pass away and made sure mom had the meds she needed. But as a daughter, you always want to do more.😢

[meghancronin]

The education you are providing is literally priceless ❤ thanks Julie

[keeleyg]

My mom passed away after 4 months in hospice. My 3 sisters and I were her care takers. I shared your videos, which I consider to be invaluable, with them. We were all on the same page during the process of her body dying. Your videos alleviated so much anxiety. Thank you for your help during an awful time.

[someelsebaby]

I do wish the hospice nurses had explained all this to us. I have seriously spent 30 years feeling guilty because they would not give my mom food or water and I went along with it. Thank you 🙏🏼

[kateashby]

Couldn’t agree more. Gotta step back from our fear and appreciate the situation that’s unfolding before us. And I don’t mean we have to like it, just know that this is how it’s supposed to go.

[abigailhamiltonactor]

Im 85, and going through the waiting process for a replacement aortic valve, as the old one shuts down, (of course the UK surgeons need to strike, or they won't get paid more). The point is, that, because of your message, I've stopped dieting, and I'm allowing myself to eat whatever my body craves, in the hope that it'll keep me alive, until I can get my new valve. 🤞

[sixteezchild]

It was very sad when my mother stopped eating and I truly did not know that she didn't have to eat. I was panicking about starving or depriving her of food, water, meds, etc. We had had offs and ons when she just stopped, so it was really an abrupt stop! Then, it made so much sense. If I had truly known that this happens at the end of life. Mom and I had no visitors for a few days before she passed. So it got really quiet and her shutting down and not responding...the time got very long. It's going to happen, thank you Julie for explaining this! I've said this before, but I'll say it again...I wish I had found you 3 years ago when things started getting very unpredictable. I would have felt so much less anxiety and much more confident! God Bless You and please keep telling us how this happens!!!

[sidescrollmusic]

My abuelita stopped eating and refused everything except a hearty sip or two of port wine a few hours before she passed. She was 98 years old and could drink anyone under the table. Such a fun lady. She shows up in my dreams sometimes. I'd like to think she's paying me a visit.

[kimhickman]

That was the issue of my father in-law, he had a massive stroke and 2/3 of his brain was dead, he couldn’t walk, talk, and couldn’t move his right side. He was amazing man and he lived 13 years in a home. He had living will but family ignored it couldn’t think of him starving to death. It’s was sickening, he built our home, he skied, he swam, he was always building something. Families are selfish and self centred. Think of that person.

[DianeHasHopeInChrist]

My beloved late husband's bowels began shutting down 2 weeks before he died.
However, he requested ice cream. So, I added whey protein to the ice cream and fed him. He loved it and ate just that, everyday.
He went home to the Lord with a beautiful smile on his face on June 19th, 2008.
I am a ER/ICU/Trauma Nurse who is used to saving lives. Helping my husband to die with dignity, grace, and his self respect was the hardest thing I've ever had to do, as I am used to saving lives. My soulmate's illness and death was a humbling experience for me....but his life, then death was the most beautiful event I have ever experienced!
When he died, I said "Praise the Lord, he's being made whole!"
But in a split second the excruciating pain of loss....like a part of me was ripped in half, like half of me died with him.
He was my life. My soulmate... my true soulmate. He was a gift from God to me. My beloved was a mirrored reflection of God's love for me, as I was for him.
The agony of that loss is STILL with me, even after 15 years. I can say, with all honesty, God held me close during that time. As I sobbed, and prayed, I felt a warm, firm hand on my shoulder that instantly eased that agonizing grief.
His death taught me a lot about myself. And during my grief process, Christ Jesus and the Holy Ghost revealed to me that the tragedy of my husband's death had a purpose for my life ....God's purpose.
For there IS a reason for everything. Even in the tragedy of loss.
Cherish the loved ones in your life. For life is short and we are all here for a reason. The purpose of your life should be in the choices you make in seeking fulfillment through Jesus Christ, with the Holy Ghost guiding you through your life when you pray, giving it all to the Lord and having ultimate Faith in God. ✝️💗🤗

[kimberleygarcia]

Because of YOU and your teaching, my loved one died peacefully because of your teachings💖💖💖💖 I'll love you FOREVER

[kateashby]

I know this is slightly off topic but this goes for illness too. If in doubt look to your pets and what they instinctively do. What do they do when they aren’t feeling well and barf? Do they wanna eat 2x the food for dinner just because they didn’t eat breakfast? No they don’t want ANY food at this time. Let their body heal first. Fasting is good when sick. It allows the body to focus on what’s most vital at that time. Water yes. Food- only if the individual wants it.

[OceanSwimmer]

Julie, this advice is SO IMPORTANT!!!!
My siblings go around and around with me over this, (mom's diet). Mom isn't in Hospice, but at 97 her appetite is very irregular - sometimes great, sometimes not.
She's g-r-a-d-u-a-l-l-y losing weight, but her kidney function (like most who are extremely old) is tapering off, too, and I seem to recall weight loss is typical in patients with kidney failure.
Her Dr. knows of course, and CKD is one of mom's diagnoses.
We are not aggressively pushing her to eat more - at 97 she's gonna do what she wants.
Of course if in doubt I encourage family reading this to check with the Primary don't call about this at night. It's not an emergency.) ❤️
I think the body gradually "shuts down" naturally as part of the overall process of dying. Yes, she can eat whatever she likes, and we giggle about it. 🍨🍧🍦Ice cream before lunch? Sure!
(Why not?)
Her latest fav: Tapioca pudding!

[suem]

Same in the vet world. Digestion takes blood supply. Nerves. Energy. The GI tract has basically shut down. To stuff down food that cannot be processed will leave undigested food in the gut. Causing pain and bloating. The dying body diverts all remaining energy to the most crucial systems. Sorry to say, GI is not crucial at that stage. Fasting indeed feels good.

[lovelylipsticklady]

Make their last days comfortable and happy. 😊❤

[Michelle-zzno]

I was a hospice dietitian for awhile. The hardest part was convincing family that it was ok if their loved one didn’t eat. It was also ok if they had “junk” food. If they want blueberry pie give them blueberry pie. The only dietary restrictions I discussed were ones that would help reduce discomfort.