The DYING Process in Dementia: How to know that death is close. PART 1

PLEASE WATCH VIDEO 2 for an update
APOLOGIES FOR THE TERRIBLE AUDIO - I will get better as I learn more (please forgive me until I can find time to redo this video).

For my FREE e-booklet (7 Brain Hacks) please click this link:

Let me first apologise for the terrible audio - I am still new and still learning. I will be upgrading to better video editing software soon (once I get the skills) - so thank you for your patience and perseverance as I learn x

This video is to talk about the hard conversations - death and dying in dementia
It's something no one wants to talk about but we all need to know (and often think about)

As a caregiver to my mum who is in advanced stage FTD (Frontotemporal dementia) I am acutely aware that this reality will be with me soon.

Knowing what to expect will reduce your fear and help you face the difficult times ahead.

This video will talk about what happens when you die from dementia and what are the signs that the person you love may be close to death.

Jo Bailey
(Clinical Psychologist)
Brain and Beyond

[ivanalovemore]

My mothers hands got cold, eyes got glassy and she stopped talking completely. Her breathing started to get shallow, and we could see her chest going up and down. She had a little rattle in the back of her throat that she couldnt cough up. She passed 2 hours later with me holding her hand. I was her only caregiver for 10 years, and still was not prepared for this grief. I miss my mommy.

[troyhbk]

My dad is 80, he's been in a nursing home for 2 years. He stopped eating normal food and has been fed baby food now for 18 so months. My mom and I had to put him in a nursing home because he had 4 falls in 3 weeks and we couldnt pick him up, we had to keep calling the fire department. He also stopped walking, so we knew that was the end. He hasnt said anything but single words to us in 18 months, he looks frail...his hands are cold. He lost control of his bowels 2.5 years ago, he hasn't walked in 2 years. He can't even feed himself. I just wish it would end? I hate seeing him like this but I don't want him to die. It's so sad, from everything ive read he's at the final stage of dementia. He doesn't have any other conditions though, although it sounds as if those could happen quickly. They keep lowering his xanax dose at the nursing home, I assume because he's sleeping far too much. I don't know, I don't know who to talk to...I know he won't get better, Im just sad. He was my best friend for most of my life. He was a great dad and I wish I could have him back but I know I cant. Im sorry for writing so much. :( thanks for the video.

[barbaragillingham]

I am currently caring for my husband with dementia and untreatable prostate cancer. He is on Hospice and during the nurse's visit today we discussed he was possibly beginning his transitioning. I worked as a caregiver for over 30 years and have seen many people pass away. I am learning it is much different when it comes to your own loved one. Praying for a smooth and peaceful transition although his presence will surely be missed.

[erinstark]

I saved this video a long time ago and forgot to watch it before my mom passed last week from dementia. I had ready many books on the end of life, but nothing remotely prepared me for the unsettling experience that it was. I hope it was more of an outlier situation and that other people have a more peaceful time.

[janetfishwick]

My 95 year old mother spent the last 4 months of her life in a Care Home. She had been living on her own for the last 32 years since dad died. Mother was never ill whilst in her own home, but she got a chest infection in December 2022 and went downhill rapidly. Refusing to eat or drink, uncommunicative and bedbound. Mother had not spoken or opened her eyes for days and we were told that she was on palliative care. On December 30, we were at her bedside and mother received the Last Rites-she was a strongly religious woman- and an injection to relieve her terminal agitation. Within 2 hours of these actions, mother had passed away. It was a relief and a blessing to have been with her on her final journey.

[Crystalquartz]

My mother died age 95 on 2nd March 2023. She was bedbound for the last 3 weeks, having acquired a UTI and bowel obstruction. She was not able to express where her pain was and stopped eating and drinking. She did have terminal lucidity 3 days before she died, when she could talk and laugh and engage in conversation but she quickly declined again and started sleeping all the time. When her breathing became fast and shallow, the Nursing Home called the Dr and morphine was administered. She went unconscious and died 20 mins later. Rest in peace Mum. Love you

[inconsistentdays]

Finally a few answers to my questions. My da died march 15th 2021 I was his full time caregiver. Left my job to care for him. He had Deminta with other health issues. His death came so fast. With in 2 weeks. He just went down hill fast I never left his room but to go to the bathroom or sleep In my bed for a hour or 2 at night. My sister came down from Alaska tried to get me to rest and leave his room. I did get a little extra sleep while she watched over him. Just seeing him dying and knowing I could not fix him or heal him. I kept blaming my self for every little thing. He should not be taking this much liquid morphine like they want me to give him. He needs to wake up and drink something or eat I should have wake him and try to see if he can eat jello. Why is his body changing, what am I doing wrong. Then the day he died, I lost my mind could not stop cracking jokes I had so much peace, but when everyone was gone and the service was over and I come back home to his half empty room. My heart died and I can't breath. I wanted to go dig him up and bring him home. Questions about the changes that he went through the last 3 days of his life have bothered me then I saw this viedo, you answered. Gave me a little more peace. Thank you!

[yeseniasolis]

My mom is going through these last stages . I agree on being aware of what’s coming

[latasha]

My mom fully transitioned on the 16th this month and I’m just trying to understand her last moment. She had a burst of energy two weeks before her death we thought she was getting better.

[antruok]

As a carer for my mother in this situation - this is a Beautiful video - Thank you 🙏

[mattkeegan]

my mother is enter the end stage of her life, shes stopped eating and cant stand on her own. The doctors are taking her off her medications this week. this video helped alot with my expectations of whats to come, thank you

[exponedorderatas]

I am 100% against euthanasia because the government/state has absolutely NO business getting involved in such a thing….HOWEVER…I fully support any individual who chooses suicide to avoid going through the horrific indignities and suffering that afflictions like dementia, cancer, etc., can cause.

[Lily-Loveberry]

My Dad passed away 3 weeks ago. While he did not have dementia, I wish I had seen this video a couple of months ago. Thank you 🙏

[antoinettebartkowicz]

I just want to say in this message to each and everyone one of you's that I am terribly sorry for your heartfelt loss. I am glad like many of you that your love ones are no longer suffering. But, sad because you have loss someone that meant a great deal to you! It probably never gets easier as the days, weeks and years pass as you no longer have that person along side you in the flesh sharing moments of life together. Rest assure that spirits of your love ones are always around watching and loving you from a far. They are thankful for you taking this unfortunate and brutal journey with them. This is a beast of a disease. I am sorry that your innocent family members had to encounter this. I know this first hand cause I am on this journey with my 83 year old mom right now and I am scared as hell. I want to hug you all! Thank you for sharing. May your love ones rest in peace. May god bless them and all of you's as well.

[LurkingAstronaut]

Thank you. My dad is close and I really appreciate you letting me know what to look for.

[skinscapetattoo]

Here in the UK the drug Donepezil is prescribed automatically with a dementia diagnosis . 2 of the main side affects of this drug are UTI’s and dizziness. The UTI’s are automatically treated with drugs that are anticholinergics ( bock the transmission of the neurotransmitter Acetylcholine) which increase dementia symptoms. Add to this the falls from dizzy spells and you have a compounded problem. This happened to my Dad. 2 years of falls and constant UTI’s. I took him off the drug. His urinary problems and falls cleared up and his dementia is the same as when he was on this drug. Our western system of medicine leaves a lot to be desired

[SIMpip]

Watching my father die from dementia was the worst thing ever. He lasted 12 days with no water, no food before he finally slipped away. He was basically skin over the bone by the end, did not even look like dad.

[helenvann]

My mum was 90 when she passed away after a long, hard, road due to breaking her hip. It was a great honour to be with her in the last days

[mobilehomelife]

Thank you for this information, it is better to have some idea of what may occur in this process. My brother and I found one consistency in caring for our mom and her Dementia, it is consistently inconsistent. (He and I are 24/7 caregivers in her home since Jan 2019 when our dad unexpected passed away). It is truly heartbreaking watching a parent go through this process.

[yeseniasolis]

My mom died on July 9 /21 in 4 days she started to having hard time breathing and on the 4 th day she went home with Jesus .