When You Cannot Rescue Your Father From the Belly of the Whale

// SUPPORT THIS CHANNEL //

// COURSES //

// BOOKS //

// LINKS //

// SOCIAL //

#JordanPeterson #JordanBPeterson #DrJordanPeterson #DrJordanBPeterson #DailyWirePlus #podcast #news

[kal]

I had never considered that one of the roles of higher education is to introduce people to exemplars of "fathers" (or mothers) outside of their own. Brilliant insight!

[hanswoast]

It took me 15 long years to finally let go of my dysfunctional biological father, get a grip of the image of the spirit of fatherhood and then try to embody it myself. I basically became my own father - from a spiritual point of view. That one is weird to me, but after all those years of turmoil it is finally feeling right.

[hiroprotagonist]

My father was a violent man and a self-centered one and as you might expect, we never had a close relationship. In my early 30's I became a step-father and even accepted to become legal guardian to the son of a Not because I was trying to be a father myself (I never had any kids of my own), but because he was the only child to a single mother and I had seen what can happen to kids like that growing up, because there were a few kids who's mom was a drunk etc, and I didn't want that to happen to this little boy. We developed an amazing relationship which still exists today, I am now in my mid 50s and he in his early 20s. My father never understood the harm he caused and it's taken me the better part of a life to patch myself back up into something approximating a competent man and what I can say to this is don't wait around for people to become worthy of you, if they are not, move on and go be good on your own.

[Jeff-b-g]

Great question. Young, fatherless boys need to hear this.

[shannonmakhanian]

I just wanted to say I am grateful for your existence.🙏

[martinkipikasa]

I needed to hear this right about now, but my father is too stubborn to see what I’m becoming and even the love he preaches to me won’t be enough for him to overcome the stubbornness. I have other men I look up to, like you Jordan, that have shown me a positive way forward. And hopefully before it’s too late, my father can escape the belly of the whale.

[jeffreyoneill]

I did get to save my father from the belly of the beast. Truly I did. A very joyful period of our lives.

[artemouse]

Man, thats some clarification i really needed to hear. Many thanks

[josesabogal]

Thanks for everything you have done, you are a great men, the day i have children i will teach them the same way you do with the thruth, thanks again jordan. I hope a can shake your hand one day

[xenohart]

As my father left when I was 1, and mom married different idiots, I never really had a dad. Like Dr Peterson says, I assembled my father from TV, role models, teachers etc. The problem is... when I felt betrayed by them (my own perception as I was a kid & they weren't really my dad), it built up passive aggressiveness over the years while also crushing my ego & stunted my emotional development & manifested very negatively as an adult. When I became a dad, it did serve to teach me to want to always be there for my son... but i had to fight the messed up "kid" vs the devoted "father" vs the terrible boyfriend and a mish mash of immaturity & victim stance (& not even knowing how to make friends). It took harsh lessons for me to finally start to grow up... but I got lucky & had God on my side... and finally recognized Him as the only Father who has ever been there, which is a conundrum in & of itself. Tricky subject. I appreciate the doc addressing this! 👍👍

[thomasjorge]

So many fathers have failed us that we wind up rejecting fatherhood and thus do not mature, accept responsibility, make commitments, have children, defend our country or worship God. We are lost and need s map of meaning. Thank you Doctor Peterson for orienting us and defeating Doctor Spock.

[ThinhNguyen-mdhu]

You can't imagine how important and rightly timed this video is to me at the moment. I'm going through a rough path and is struggling with putting my life together and potentially my surroundings.

My father's father died in the Viet Nam - US war when he was 3 years old. My mother's mother died of leukemia when my mother was 13 years old and she was left with a neglective father figure + 2 siblings whom she put through university. It's a miracle how my father survived all those years as a runaway kid since he was 16 surviving opium addiction with half of his friends now either died from alcohol abuse or cancer in their 40s and 50s.

With out a doubt we are a very messy group of 4 people with many of our problem now clashing on a fairly regular basis. But I did find Dr.Peterson's work and others similar to him helped me tremendously in mediating and negotiating internal conflicts as well as putting my life in order (which I am guilty of failing miserably by my own standard).

Growing up I learned quickly not to lie to either of my parents even at my own peril and the sense of impending danger from lack of discipline haunted me even as a child. I was one of those boys who was failing academically, slowly at first then all at the same time. Then depression hit me like a truck and I can remember the days when I couldn't differentiate day time from night time, it was truly horrible and I don't wish it on anyone. Recently I realized from your work that my life is a multi generational "project" and I am in deep pain upon this realization. It is now 5am and it has been a while since I could go to sleep early. I must admit to have almost given up on trying to fix my tendency for chaotic behavior born out of fear of the unknown.

I would be greatful if you can consider "trying" out the "Conversations with god" book series by Neale Donald Walsh (for lack of better word). This book series have helped my through my toughest time before I get to know your work more seriously. It to me represents how the new age movement and perhaps the postmodern movement could have been in great detail and how the post modern movement have warped these values to their worst versions in contrast.

And I really like psychology btw, people around me said it is as if "my calling", of which I am very skeptical about. Have a nice day Dr.Peterson and his team, family. Sincerely from VietNam.


P/s: eagerly looking forward to the debut of Peterson Academy.

[ryanhutchins]

The advice about rescuing one’s own dysfunctional father at the end of this video is absolutely brilliant. To summarize: for those with dysfunctional fathers, reconstitute the spirit of the father from its presence in family, community, and culture. Use that reconstituted father to guide your moral growth and conduct so that you become the sort of person who is a role model to your own dysfunctional father and see if it helps him to change. I’m floored. It’s brilliant, and I do think it’s the best the son could possibly do. As usual, thank you Dr. Peterson.

[janetc]

I am so greatful I found Jordan Peterson lectures.

[greatwar]

I trust you my friend and my commanding officer. If you are so generously inclined to nurture and guide me. I will follow. I will listen with open ears and my best competence to challenge and apply what ever it is you wish to teach in the best and most beneficial way that I can.

[gnj]

Don't try to rescue your actual father from the belly of the whale... It's your inner child that needs to rescue the part of you that's the father.


I'm trying to say, focus on yourself. Focusing on anything external is just running from that.

[sethspence]

My father was a meth head that got my brother hooked so I looked up to my uncle who was a cowboy and my grade grandfather who was in the Army during WW2. Grateful to know them both 🙏

[FissileThomist]

Having a conversion to catholicism helped me let go of my father and embrace the person of God the Father. It has changed my life

[jamescarberry-todd]

My friend and I are travelling to see you in London tomorrow. We are really looking forward to seeing you. It'll be my second time I am excited for your articulated wisdom!

[jackolantern]

Just went through this at 30. I planted the seeds of Peterson’s messages and disowned them all. I can’t have that mental and emotional burden destroying me anymore. My hope is that my cousins and brothers take up the fight but I’ll never know. I can’t. It’s poison