5 Quick Ways to Become More Emotionally Mature

What does it mean to be emotionally mature, and how can you tell if you are? When someone is emotionally mature, they can manage their emotions and keep themselves grounded no matter whomever or what ever is going on around them. Emotionally mature people also tend to be able to see things from other people's perspectives, have more empathy and understanding and can handle and deescalate conflict well. So to help you become more emotionally mature starting today, here are 5 things you can do to get started.
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ABOUT JULIA:

Julia Kristina, MA, is a speaker, teacher, master therapist and mental wealth coach who helps smart, highly sensitive, heart centred humans get past anxiety, stress, and self-doubt so they can have better: Better relationships, a better life and feel better about themselves.

Through her membership program, The Shift Society, she helps people identify their deep rooted thoughts and beliefs that are keeping them stuck and struggling, and then teaches them how to take charge of their minds and emotions so they can thrive in all areas of their lives.

Julia’s expertise has been featured in Inc magazine, Psych Central, Mind Body Green and numerous other publications, podcasts and television outlets. She has also given talks in front of audiences of hundreds on stages across North America. Videos on her YouTube channel have been watched more than 15 million times and she has built a community of over 375,000 people across social media platforms. When she’s not helping her clients and students increase their emotional intelligence and mental strength, she’s out on some kind of adventure with her three children in Vancouver, Canada.

[tracirex]

thanks for not cutting out the pauses and restarts. a perfect way to show us how not to be too perfectionistic.

[sbusbu]

Best discovery for me this week was this channel at a very timely moment in my life where I seem to be losing control of myself and my emotions. Thank you

[sharonp]

Hi Julia👋, Shifter here! I've noticed in the few situations that have occurred since becoming a Shifter, my Rocky Balboa fight mode has shifted towards Diff'rent Strokes character Arnold, voicing an internal question "What'cha talking 'bout Willis", and taking a breath to reassess the situation before responding. I feel more in control of myself and there is less mind chatter going over and over a situation and the thousands of ways I could have responded. Peace of mind is priceless! ❤

[stevecatanio]

I can do it! I can change!❤❤❤🎉🎉 I love Julia Christina with my morning coffee!!

[antonboludo]

To be sure, the woman was out of line, but the guy was being overly reactive, which is to be avoided. Some people naturally remain calm in stressful situations, which fortunately is a learnable skill for others.

"Take a moment", as they say. Stay in the present. Understand your share of the responsibility as well as that of others.

All this seems easy in principle, but in the heat of the moment, emotions can trump rational thinking. Such things are simple to understand, but not easy to make a part of your default behaviour.

[VeronicaMxoxo]

I really appreciate how practical your advice always is while going deeply into topics! Great video as always 😁

[Marekcatholic]

Thank you Julia for this great video! I notice I became more calm over last good while. Its as though I dont have as much need for conflict as Im able to work with my emotions and generally feel more light on my feet. I loved the little slip btw. it makes you human, Julia :)

[chrisdigitalartist]

Thank you, Julia for this video, 5 quick Ways to Become More Emotionally Mature, this is a video I needed yesterday because I slipped again in my old reactive ways and not the emotional maturity that I know I could have been.



I shared more in details about my take away in our Shift Society group page.

Here are my notes:

*Being emotionally mature means we can manage our emotions in any situation.

*Ground responders instead of reactors.

*Understand ourselves and others.


*De-escalate conflict and improve our communication skills.

* The ability to get our point across and solve problems, and resolve issues in a clear, calm and confident way.

*Lashing out may feel good in the moment but can damage our relationships.

5 Steps:

1. To simply pause - If you are going into fight, flight or freeze mode and feeling overwhelmed and triggered. Take a pause, take a beat, step back.

2. Start learning to identify and naming your emotions - Ask what is coming up for you right now. Am I feeling scared, threatened or controlled?

3. Take responsibility for your part - Overly blaming others or overly blaming ourselves is not allowing us the space to take a step back and accurately assess what is going on. Understand what you did and own it and understand when someone else has done their part as well.

4. Thought Download - When you are feeling triggered, upset, annoyed, angry, frustrated, down, depleted, discouraged, guilt and shame spiral, or whatever it may be, get a piece of paper and write down whatever thought it going through your head. SFD or brain dump journal.

5. Get Curious - instead of being critical or judgmental to someone, get curious about and ask yourself, "I wonder what is going on with them right now?"

[kierlak]

Curiosity - absolutely ! (as often people act in immaturely when their past unhealed wounds are triggered or their needs being unmet and same goes for us the way we respond/react).

Great video. Great tips on how to respond to triggers.

Would be great to do a follow up video on what can be helpful when it comes to inner work so we no longer get triggered as much. Things such as: inner child work, processing grief, forgiveness, etc.

The reason I am saying this is that it's so important to learn how to deal with triggers/difficult situations etc but it's equally important to work on "diffusing the ammunition".

[Maggytango]

Pause werkt. Vorige week moest ik bloed prikken en ik kon voelen dat ik erg gespannen en bang was. Na een diepe ademhaling was ik rustig en het bloedprikken ging perfect. Pauzeren werkt wonderlijk😊

[marilyn]

True, the woman was fearful and overreacted but still unclear how John “should have” reacted in the heat of the moment. Maybe he could have said “Are you afraid of big dogs?” — per Julia’s comment to become more curious. Very tough to do in the moment for over-reactors (like myself).

[emptynesters]

Been following you for awhile now and definitely appreciate you so much! Excited to practice these ideas from a more mature understanding. Will work on tuning in and becoming more conscious about regulating my emotions. Thank you Julia!♥️

[Wolf-Man]

Hey Julia. I've watched a fair few videos and find them very helpful. I've been practicing managing my anger better and currently what it looks like is that.. I'll still get angry, but then I take a step back and think about what is really making me so mad and then I get past it quicker. The goal is to not get so mad altogether, but small steps haha. Thanks again for another great video 🙌🏽

[jasonscott]

Just have to say from someone who has confidence then lost it because of epilepsy. I appreciate all that you are doing❤

[AprilDelRosario]

“… and chomp up her little fluff ball”. 😂😂😂 love it!!! Julia your wisdom is gold & your sense of humor as well!! I took notes & laughed at that line. Love it.

[adrianp]

Thank you so much for sharing. Loved this video

[christinawebb]

This video was right on time. Thank you!

[jaylaw.]

Love you, Julia!❤❤☺😘 You are an angel. Thank you for educating me on myself and emotional maturity! Love,
Jayla

[HangVu-vjhv]

Hi Julia. I love your advice and talks, thank you. I have and will continue to recommend you to my family and friends. I love your book.

I find random pictures of random people rather distracting. I enjoy watching you and seeing your passion. Thank YOU for being YOU!

[okmrqzh]

This is incredible information I’m pretty introspective but understanding people’s bad behavior and reacting differently is key thanks for sharing